DH won’t let me track his Phone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You do realize it’s not HIS paranoia that’s the issue here.
It’s YOUR paranoia that is causing you distress about this matter.

What are you saying I’m paranoid about?

Paranoid about the terror of missing a text when either of you are running or biking or driving.
Paranoid about the panic of losing each other in amusement parks and other public spaces.
Paranoid about the horror of dinner preparation and not knowing whether to wait for him or go ahead and eat without him.
All your words.
You seem paranoid about the dreadful uncertainties of everyday life it would seem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You do realize it’s not HIS paranoia that’s the issue here.
It’s YOUR paranoia that is causing you distress about this matter.

What are you saying I’m paranoid about?

Paranoid about the terror of missing a text when either of you are running or biking or driving.
Paranoid about the panic of losing each other in amusement parks and other public spaces.
Paranoid about the horror of dinner preparation and not knowing whether to wait for him or go ahead and eat without him.
All your words.
You seem paranoid about the dreadful uncertainties of everyday life it would seem.

Oh goodness. No those are t my words. Those are all just scenarios of convenience and usefulness. No one is in terror, horror, or panic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You do realize it’s not HIS paranoia that’s the issue here.
It’s YOUR paranoia that is causing you distress about this matter.

What are you saying I’m paranoid about?

Paranoid about the terror of missing a text when either of you are running or biking or driving.
Paranoid about the panic of losing each other in amusement parks and other public spaces.
Paranoid about the horror of dinner preparation and not knowing whether to wait for him or go ahead and eat without him.
All your words.
You seem paranoid about the dreadful uncertainties of everyday life it would seem.

Oh goodness. No those are t my words. Those are all just scenarios of convenience and usefulness. No one is in terror, horror, or panic.

Aren’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You do realize it’s not HIS paranoia that’s the issue here.
It’s YOUR paranoia that is causing you distress about this matter.

What are you saying I’m paranoid about?

Paranoid about the terror of missing a text when either of you are running or biking or driving.
Paranoid about the panic of losing each other in amusement parks and other public spaces.
Paranoid about the horror of dinner preparation and not knowing whether to wait for him or go ahead and eat without him.
All your words.
You seem paranoid about the dreadful uncertainties of everyday life it would seem.

Oh goodness. No those are t my words. Those are all just scenarios of convenience and usefulness. No one is in terror, horror, or panic.

So relax and respect his wishes then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a woman. I would never allow anyone to track me. Completely invasive. I am with your DH.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I can think of SO many scenarios where it would be useful, especially for us. Neither of us are very good at seeing text messages, or responding.

Neither of us are good at letting each other know where we are. When I’m with the kids, I don’t hear my phone, and when I’m running or biking or driving, I don’t respond to texts. DH doesn’t always see my texts at work and he of course doesn’t text either when he’s driving, biking. He also notoriously NEVER hears his phone when he’s with the kids somewhere.

We’ve lost each other in amusement parks and other public spaces. It drives me nuts. He comes home anywhere from 5-6:30 and I never know exactly when and he doesn’t text to let me know. So when I’m preparing dinner, I like to know whether we should wait for him or go ahead and eat without him. Sometimes I take kids to the park before dinner or take them on an errand, and DH comes home and finds us gone, so he always texts to see where we are, but most of the time, I dont see his text. I have a health condition but I run and bike really long distances and it makes me feel better knowing DH knows where I’m running and biking just in case I collapse for some reason or am jumped by someone. Yes, that’s one of those less likely scenarios, but it’s still a possibility.

I don’t suspect he’s cheating. He’s just very paranoid about privacy stuff and being tracked by companies, the government, etc. He says there are so many ways to track you now that you have zero anonymity. And He doesn’t trust the government at all- doesn’t believe they regulate it AND that they can and do nefariously use that tracking data to keep monitor people.

It sounds like you two have a communication problem, not a tracking problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I can think of SO many scenarios where it would be useful, especially for us. Neither of us are very good at seeing text messages, or responding.

Neither of us are good at letting each other know where we are. When I’m with the kids, I don’t hear my phone, and when I’m running or biking or driving, I don’t respond to texts. DH doesn’t always see my texts at work and he of course doesn’t text either when he’s driving, biking. He also notoriously NEVER hears his phone when he’s with the kids somewhere.

We’ve lost each other in amusement parks and other public spaces. It drives me nuts. He comes home anywhere from 5-6:30 and I never know exactly when and he doesn’t text to let me know. So when I’m preparing dinner, I like to know whether we should wait for him or go ahead and eat without him. Sometimes I take kids to the park before dinner or take them on an errand, and DH comes home and finds us gone, so he always texts to see where we are, but most of the time, I dont see his text. I have a health condition but I run and bike really long distances and it makes me feel better knowing DH knows where I’m running and biking just in case I collapse for some reason or am jumped by someone. Yes, that’s one of those less likely scenarios, but it’s still a possibility.

I don’t suspect he’s cheating. He’s just very paranoid about privacy stuff and being tracked by companies, the government, etc. He says there are so many ways to track you now that you have zero anonymity. And He doesn’t trust the government at all- doesn’t believe they regulate it AND that they can and do nefariously use that tracking data to keep monitor people.

It sounds like you two have a communication problem, not a tracking problem.

True. But it’s much easier to turn a switch on your phone rather than try to problem solve all our communication issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I can think of SO many scenarios where it would be useful, especially for us. Neither of us are very good at seeing text messages, or responding.

Neither of us are good at letting each other know where we are. When I’m with the kids, I don’t hear my phone, and when I’m running or biking or driving, I don’t respond to texts. DH doesn’t always see my texts at work and he of course doesn’t text either when he’s driving, biking. He also notoriously NEVER hears his phone when he’s with the kids somewhere.

We’ve lost each other in amusement parks and other public spaces. It drives me nuts. He comes home anywhere from 5-6:30 and I never know exactly when and he doesn’t text to let me know. So when I’m preparing dinner, I like to know whether we should wait for him or go ahead and eat without him. Sometimes I take kids to the park before dinner or take them on an errand, and DH comes home and finds us gone, so he always texts to see where we are, but most of the time, I dont see his text. I have a health condition but I run and bike really long distances and it makes me feel better knowing DH knows where I’m running and biking just in case I collapse for some reason or am jumped by someone. Yes, that’s one of those less likely scenarios, but it’s still a possibility.

I don’t suspect he’s cheating. He’s just very paranoid about privacy stuff and being tracked by companies, the government, etc. He says there are so many ways to track you now that you have zero anonymity. And He doesn’t trust the government at all- doesn’t believe they regulate it AND that they can and do nefariously use that tracking data to keep monitor people.

It sounds like you two have a communication problem, not a tracking problem.

True. But it’s much easier to turn a switch on your phone rather than try to problem solve all our communication issues.

Evidently it’s not as easy as you thought it’d be seeing how hubby isn’t comfortable with the idea.
May as well resort to Plan B and try to problem solve all your communication issues.

[Anonymous]

I put on shared location so DW could see when I leave for work and if I’m stuck in traffic. Not a big deal. She doesn’t like to have tracking so I don’t care, side effect is I call and text her more when we are coordinating things.

OP DH is an idiot. If someone was tracking him, they will do so regardless of whether find your friends is on. Does he turn off location services? Then they track via WiFi and cell tower triangulation. Does he airplane mode it? Maybe they turn off internal GPS...

The point is, if he is paranoid he should not have a phone. These privacy theater nonsense is weird.

His router purchase worries me that he is into something illicit. Though I don’t know why he wouldn’t use TOR browser instead.

[Anonymous]

So turn on your switch and accept that he doesn’t want to. What DCUM thinks is irrelevant and won’t change his mind. Learn to communicate better or learn to accept knowing less than you want to know. People did get through life for a number of years before GPS.

[Anonymous]

Everyone has limits and mine would be against tracking. It's invasive to me. Would you want your DH reading every text message you send? Allowing him to record your conversations with friends? What do you have to hide?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So turn on your switch and accept that he doesn’t want to. What DCUM thinks is irrelevant and won’t change his mind. Learn to communicate better or learn to accept knowing less than you want to know. People did get through life for a number of years before GPS.

+1

[Anonymous]

Honestly, all of your reasons for wanting to “track” him sound pretty silly and dramatic to me. You know he gets home within a certain window generally - why wouldn’t you wait for him to eat dinner? Etc etc. Just weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, all of your reasons for wanting to “track” him sound pretty silly and dramatic to me. You know he gets home within a certain window generally - why wouldn’t you wait for him to eat dinner? Etc etc. Just weird.

I cook real dinners almost every night. Most taste best when just cooked and still hot. And I have young kids I like to feed on the earlier side if possible because they get hangry. Yeah it’s not a dealbreaker- it’s just one of those things that would be convenient.

[Anonymous]

Why is he tracking you? Sounds like double standards. If you can’t trust him than you shouldn’t be with him, but nobody should need to track anyone.