When sorority rush goes wrong

[Anonymous]

Sophomore rush isn’t really a thing at the schools are sororities are uber competitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tonight they will submit a ranking again. Tomorrow morning, they will get their sisterhood party invitation schedule. There are a maximum of seven sororities for each girl. If they had fewer than seven for philanthropy, obviously they will still have fewer than seven for the next round. On Monday night, they will submit rankings again for preference round. They can only attend a maximum of two. Some girls will get one. I suppose it is possible that some girls will also get zero. Based on the timing of the other releases, I would expect their preference schedule to come out about an hour to an hour and a half before they have to be there. I believe that is this weekend.

Why do you know all this?

lol—NP but what many of you who are non-Greek may not be aware of is that there are 26 NPC sororities that each have between 46-180 collegiate chapters all over the country and at least that many alumnae groups. These are multi-million dollar businesses and most have at least 40 paid full time staff members and an “army” of trained volunteers who serve as collegiate chapter advisory boards to support recruitment efforts, marketing, leadership development, fundraising, housing operations, and money management.
It’s not just a club. It’s a fine-tuned machine and for every college campus that holds formal recruitment, there are 100+ alumnae members of that Greek system who can tell you exactly what the dates are, what the stats are, and the party structure, including how many parties the PNMs can attend and when bid day is. These aren’t chosen at random. The dates and part structure numbers and process are all voted on by the chapter representatives and deigned to make the intake process “fair” to the longevity of the chapters in the system, with the goal being survival of the system such that each chapter is thriving within the system.

I thought the poster who discussed alumni contributions from Greek members had an interesting point: follow the money. This feels like a giant money machine with adults as the beneficiaries at the expense of teens.

I'm the poster who made that comment. I hadn't thought about it in such detail, but it sort of is as you describe. What's in it for the schools? Future alums who statistically give a lot more. What's in it for the sororities? A made-up network that can pay off in job and social connections for members for years. All funded by families who want their kids to have a fun college experience, and to be better connected when they graduate.

It's a fascinating process when you consider the size and scope of these organizations, and how embedded they are in American culture.

They really aren’t embedded in American culture anywhere that matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sophomore rush isn’t really a thing at the schools are sororities are uber competitive.

My DD rushed sophomore year at UCLA.

[Anonymous]

Sophomores won't have a lot of options at UM unless they are looking at the chapters who didn't participate in formal rush this winter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. She could not join a house and rush again next year. Her friends in certain houses could help her get in.

My DD at UCLA didn’t get the ones she wanted freshman year. Didn’t pledge. Then this sophomore year knew all her friends and rush was easy. Got what she wanted.

[Anonymous]

Not OP, and DD isn't at UM, but I've been following
Because my kid was also rushing g this week.

Reporting back that she got a bid and she's happy! Not the top house, but a solid mid tier, better than she thought she'd get if you'd asked her four days ago.

I asked her, would you rather not be in. Sorority or would you rather be in this one? And the answer was in a sorority. Sometimes, you just want to be included.

All the ranking stuff becomes irrelevant over time. Just find people you like!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sophomore rush isn’t really a thing at the schools are sororities are uber competitive.

My DD rushed sophomore year at UCLA.

Irrelevant, only 13 percent of the kids are Greek at UCLA. Hardly ubercompetitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not OP, and DD isn't at UM, but I've been following
Because my kid was also rushing g this week.

Reporting back that she got a bid and she's happy! Not the top house, but a solid mid tier, better than she thought she'd get if you'd asked her four days ago.

I asked her, would you rather not be in. Sorority or would you rather be in this one? And the answer was in a sorority. Sometimes, you just want to be included.

All the ranking stuff becomes irrelevant over time. Just find people you like!

Congrats to your daughter! My dd had the same choice and opted not to join. Didn't want to join a sorority just for the sake of joing one. Now a junior and no regrets. Both choices can lead to good results, op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sophomore rush isn’t really a thing at the schools are sororities are uber competitive.

My DD rushed sophomore year at UCLA.

Irrelevant, only 13 percent of the kids are Greek at UCLA. Hardly ubercompetitive.

It’s not about the whole school. For better or worse, this is the world she connects with. She says many people there are bots, whatever that means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sophomore rush isn’t really a thing at the schools are sororities are uber competitive.

My DD rushed sophomore year at UCLA.

Irrelevant, only 13 percent of the kids are Greek at UCLA. Hardly ubercompetitive.

It’s not about the whole school. For better or worse, this is the world she connects with. She says many people there are bots, whatever that means.

And there are only 10 and she was interested in two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. The lowest tier houses mean she'll be separated from all her current friends. And the lower tier houses are not a guarantee themselves. She could very likely not be either of them either.

I guess my true question is (let's not get caught up in house tiering) is: what happened to your kid if they were either not matched to any house or separated from all their current friends? Did they bounce back socially? Did they transfer?

Seriously!?!?! "did they transfer"!?!?!?!

Greek life should enhance their current group of friends/grow the social circle. If she cannot remain friends with her "current group of friends" why the hell would you want to join greek life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, OP, it's Monday. What happened?

Yea OP what happened?

[Anonymous]

Not my daughter's situation, but loads of friends have had this.
1. Wait until rush is over - a lot happens with COB (continuous open bidding).
2. She's better off not joining a sorority then joining a house she won't fit in. Oftentimes, the sorority friends will include her in things and parties.
3. She can rush again sophomore year and it is almost always easier.

I am sorry, mama. This hurts, but it will be okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not my daughter's situation, but loads of friends have had this.
1. Wait until rush is over - a lot happens with COB (continuous open bidding).
2. She's better off not joining a sorority then joining a house she won't fit in. Oftentimes, the sorority friends will include her in things and parties.
3. She can rush again sophomore year and it is almost always easier.

I am sorry, mama. This hurts, but it will be okay.

The bold is the important part.

Based on the number of participants this year and Theta recolonizing, the girls were told not to rely on COB. Sophomores do not fare well in primary recruitment at UM.

That said, I think the craziness will settle down in a month. I'd hate to see someone transfer over rush, but I feel like if they did, it wasn't really rush....that was just the last straw.

[Anonymous]

For those saying that kids will hold onto to their friends despite Rush results---the friendships coming out of freshman fall are in their infancy. They're more acquaintances than anything.

My daughter is very social and if you looked at her Instagram she's always with a pack of 6-8 girls and looks like she's having a great time. However, only 1 of that group has turned into a ride-or-die friend and I think that's actually doing pretty well for the girls only being in college for 3-4 months. The rest are somewhere in the casual friend stage an are vulnerable to ending if schedules don't align due to Rush or whatever.