Widower with three kids - am I crazy?

[Anonymous]

+bump

[Anonymous]

OP here - I can’t believe people remember this from almost a year ago! Everything is wonderful and while we are not officially engaged we have told our parents that that is on the horizon. The children and I have developed a great relationship and they are very comfortable doing things just with me. I have gone on vacation with them a couple of times and while I was initially felt awkward about it everything went fine. The only sticky thing was work related because he was a client of my company and our HR person got pissy but my CEO was very happy for me and made things work. I’ve had plenty of time to consider what I might be taking on and while it scares me I love the feeling that it’s not just one person who wants me in their lives. Yes, the more cynical DCumers will jump all over me as a Hallmark movie but it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I can’t believe people remember this from almost a year ago! Everything is wonderful and while we are not officially engaged we have told our parents that that is on the horizon. The children and I have developed a great relationship and they are very comfortable doing things just with me. I have gone on vacation with them a couple of times and while I was initially felt awkward about it everything went fine. The only sticky thing was work related because he was a client of my company and our HR person got pissy but my CEO was very happy for me and made things work. I’ve had plenty of time to consider what I might be taking on and while it scares me I love the feeling that it’s not just one person who wants me in their lives. Yes, the more cynical DCumers will jump all over me as a Hallmark movie but it is what it is.

Good for you! I am so glad that you stepped outside of your comfort zone. Wishing you all the best in the future!

[Anonymous]

Wow! That’s wonderful!

I am curious if spending time with the children has made you feel that you want a baby or do you feel more like you’re the last piece of the puzzle and the family is complete?

[Anonymous]

Happy for you, op!

[Anonymous]

I'm the first person who asked for an update! Thank you SO much for posting! I'm so happy to hear things are working out well! A little fear is healthy and it sounds like everyone is managing it well. Please be sure to let us know if/when you get married! Best wishes and hugs!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow! That’s wonderful!

I am curious if spending time with the children has made you feel that you want a baby or do you feel more like you’re the last piece of the puzzle and the family is complete?

OP here...again...yes we have talked about it. He is very willing to go along with whatever I want and I think I do want one but I do have concerns about our ages. I think the children are old enough to really embrace the idea of there being a baby in the house. Time is not my ally here so we need to move things along.

[Anonymous]

I love your story OP!!! Hurrah!!

[Anonymous]

Yay! This is great, OP! I just looked back at your original post -- it was so hopeful and sweet. It makes me happy that you have found each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a red flag he’s already introduced you to his kids and had you spend that much time with them.

+ 1 million

Former single Mom, I would NEVER "hook" someone with my kids and family first and then ask on a date. The kinds of men that do that are abusers. Google "love bombing."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a red flag he’s already introduced you to his kids and had you spend that much time with them.

+ 1 million

Former single Mom, I would NEVER "hook" someone with my kids and family first and then ask on a date. The kinds of men that do that are abusers. Google "love bombing."

OP was right. Here the cynics. He didn’t lure her in with kids. If anything that was scaring her off. Congrats OP! This reallybwould make a cute hallmark movie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I can’t believe people remember this from almost a year ago! Everything is wonderful and while we are not officially engaged we have told our parents that that is on the horizon. The children and I have developed a great relationship and they are very comfortable doing things just with me. I have gone on vacation with them a couple of times and while I was initially felt awkward about it everything went fine. The only sticky thing was work related because he was a client of my company and our HR person got pissy but my CEO was very happy for me and made things work. I’ve had plenty of time to consider what I might be taking on and while it scares me I love the feeling that it’s not just one person who wants me in their lives. Yes, the more cynical DCumers will jump all over me as a Hallmark movie but it is what it is.

:')

[Anonymous]

So sweet! Best wishes, OP!

[Anonymous]

SUPER excited for you, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow! That’s wonderful!

I am curious if spending time with the children has made you feel that you want a baby or do you feel more like you’re the last piece of the puzzle and the family is complete?

OP here...again...yes we have talked about it. He is very willing to go along with whatever I want and I think I do want one but I do have concerns about our ages. I think the children are old enough to really embrace the idea of there being a baby in the house. Time is not my ally here so we need to move things along.

Time is definitely not your ally so you do need to move things along. If you do want to have a baby tell him and move up getting engaged and married otherwise you could be 41 or 42 which is far from ideal. Regardless, best wishes!