Honestly interested in sending child away

[Anonymous]

All that rage often comes from somewhere. I’ll raise one possibility I haven’t seen mentioned yet.

If there were someone in your daughter’s life sexually abusing her, who would it be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school did a screen and said there were zero signs of ASD. I asked both the neuropsych doctor that did the neuropsych evaluation and the school and how they could actually test for these things if she wasn’t flaring up or being challenged, they didn’t have a good answer.

I’m not sure what I can do if both private and public sources are telling us she doesn’t have any psych or spectrum challenges.

What do they say about her lack of personal interests or "lack of personality" as you characterize it? You say she takes on the characteristics and interests of the child she is currently playing with, which eventually becomes a turn off for them.

The professionals you are working with must have some thoughts about this. It's very unusual for a NT child.

What’s unusual for a NT child?

Taking on the interests of another child until the other child burns out.

[Anonymous]

Did OP comment on the diet suggestions? Did I miss her post?
Was she willing to try it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All that rage often comes from somewhere. I’ll raise one possibility I haven’t seen mentioned yet.

If there were someone in your daughter’s life sexually abusing her, who would it be?

We specifically cited that concern with her and with the therapists. She repeatedly says no in all company.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school did a screen and said there were zero signs of ASD. I asked both the neuropsych doctor that did the neuropsych evaluation and the school and how they could actually test for these things if she wasn’t flaring up or being challenged, they didn’t have a good answer.

I’m not sure what I can do if both private and public sources are telling us she doesn’t have any psych or spectrum challenges.

What do they say about her lack of personal interests or "lack of personality" as you characterize it? You say she takes on the characteristics and interests of the child she is currently playing with, which eventually becomes a turn off for them.

The professionals you are working with must have some thoughts about this. It's very unusual for a NT child.

What’s unusual for a NT child?

Taking on the interests of another child until the other child burns out.

I agree--this would be very unusual in an NT child.

[Anonymous]

Was she always acting like this? Or when did the hysterics start?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All that rage often comes from somewhere. I’ll raise one possibility I haven’t seen mentioned yet.

If there were someone in your daughter’s life sexually abusing her, who would it be?

We specifically cited that concern with her and with the therapists. She repeatedly says no in all company.

It sounds like you don't completely believe her. So I will repeat the question: if there were someone sexually abusing her, who would it be?

I mean, answer the question that is literally on the screen, not the implied question "could she be being sexually abused?" And then check your gut about the answer.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm so sorry. And also sorry for the unhelpful comments here. People who can't relate should thank their lucky stars.

I have a similar child but more of a roller coaster. We have good and really terrible periods. The only suggestion I can make is to switch everything up that's not working. New therapist, new psychiatrist, different meds, parent coaching (I agree that this is beyond PEP, but a Dan Shapiro class would be good - and he may have suggestions for additional resources). A comprehensive facility like KKI might be able to support you on several fronts. I totally get the time away from work (that is also what keeps me sane, often) but you can no go one like this long term, so you may need to invest some time is setting up a more supportive team, even using FMLA if necessary.

You definitely need more support and better care. In my case, I asked anyone and everyone for recommendations. It took some time (and is always a work in progress as needs change) but we assembled a team that has helped us tremendously and is able to adapt with us to changes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm so sorry. And also sorry for the unhelpful comments here. People who can't relate should thank their lucky stars.

I have a similar child but more of a roller coaster. We have good and really terrible periods. The only suggestion I can make is to switch everything up that's not working. New therapist, new psychiatrist, different meds, parent coaching (I agree that this is beyond PEP, but a Dan Shapiro class would be good - and he may have suggestions for additional resources). A comprehensive facility like KKI might be able to support you on several fronts. I totally get the time away from work (that is also what keeps me sane, often) but you can no go one like this long term, so you may need to invest some time is setting up a more supportive team, even using FMLA if necessary.

You definitely need more support and better care. In my case, I asked anyone and everyone for recommendations. It took some time (and is always a work in progress as needs change) but we assembled a team that has helped us tremendously and is able to adapt with us to changes.

OP, been there, done that. It's not easy. I sometimes walk around in a daze due to very so overwhelmed emotionally and physically. To make matters worse, I can't get the DD to therapy. She completely refuses, puts up a huge fight, she's stronger and faster than I am so there's no way I can make her go. One suggestion I have is to try an SSRI. That could help her irritability. I would also suggest talking to psychiatrist aobut treating her ADHD. The behavior you describing sounds like impulsivity. Dr. Shapiro's class is helpful (Parent Child Journey). Most importantly for DH and I, his approach is compassionate and really understands the struggle families go throug.

[Anonymous]

That kind of desperate screaming for attention makes me think(like the other pp) that there is something else happening. Some kind of abuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The school did a screen and said there were zero signs of ASD. I asked both the neuropsych doctor that did the neuropsych evaluation and the school and how they could actually test for these things if she wasn’t flaring up or being challenged, they didn’t have a good answer.

I’m not sure what I can do if both private and public sources are telling us she doesn’t have any psych or spectrum challenges.

Isn't it partly diagnosed through forms that you fill out? If you see signs of ASD then typically that shows up in the forms and the diagnosis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:ADHD and dyslexia with no psych stuff

Been evaluated twice

Have you ruled out PANS, yeast overgrowth, co-infections, lyme, MARCoNS, leaky gut? Any one of these can contribute to brain inflammation which can cause one or all of: behavioral issues, dysregulation, obsessive thinking (perseverating on not getting ones way), obsessive bheaviors, anxiety, etc...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school did a screen and said there were zero signs of ASD. I asked both the neuropsych doctor that did the neuropsych evaluation and the school and how they could actually test for these things if she wasn’t flaring up or being challenged, they didn’t have a good answer.

I’m not sure what I can do if both private and public sources are telling us she doesn’t have any psych or spectrum challenges.

Isn't it partly diagnosed through forms that you fill out? If you see signs of ASD then typically that shows up in the forms and the diagnosis.

The questionnaires aren't as accurate as an ADOS bt an experienced provider, especially for girls.

[Anonymous]

"Pediatricians see children before, during, and after adverse events. In the office, clinicians deal daily with children who are suffering the effects of trauma, including separation and loss, physical and sexual abuse, parental neglect, and witnessing violence. Many of these children, especially those for whom the stress is particularly severe, chronic, or pervasive, will have difficulty overcoming their persistent physiological and psychological responses to their earlier stress. Lingering symptoms of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or disrupted attachment can present as difficulties with sleep, anxiety, oppositional behavior, violent behaviors, and school failure.2,3
The child's problematic behavior may continue long after abuse or neglect have ceased, despite consistent and attentive parenting by foster or adoptive parents or birth parents who have successfully changed their own behaviors. Desperate caregivers may seek the pediatrician's help in diagnosing and treating a suspected “medical condition” or “chemical imbalance.” Unless health care professionals recognize the relationships of these common behavior problems to their remote antecedents, their interventions will be at best inefficient and at worst ineffective or even counterproductive. The primary health care professional holds the first, perhaps most critical link for caregivers and children: to help them understand that the child's unsatisfactory response to stress may have originated as a biologically based adaptation to the child's abnormal world and that persisting problem behaviors are the consequence."

[Anonymous]

Have you considers pandas?