How to marry a financially compatible man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

Listen, if you want to date a rich guy, you need to ask yourself what you bring to the table OTHER THAN MONEY. That guy is not interested in the money. And most definitely that guy is not going to be interested in someone who got some passive income in a divorce settlement.

You can meet all sorts of rich guys if you think for a minute: the country club, opera, art galleries, boating, etc. etc. But getting someone financially compatible to be interested is a whole other story, and your attitude about money is not going to help.

[Anonymous]

I heard Rupert Murdoch is getting divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

Listen, if you want to date a rich guy, you need to ask yourself what you bring to the table OTHER THAN MONEY. That guy is not interested in the money. And most definitely that guy is not going to be interested in someone who got some passive income in a divorce settlement.

You can meet all sorts of rich guys if you think for a minute: the country club, opera, art galleries, boating, etc. etc. But getting someone financially compatible to be interested is a whole other story, and your attitude about money is not going to help.

I didn't get a "passive income" in divorce, here's what shows your prejudice to women in general. It is my business since the very beginning. It's not a passive income. I've always had this business, developed and grew it over the course of marriage having a much higher involvement than my exH. I repaid nearly $1.5mm collaterized loans; had personal and credit card debt during constructions, was a signatory on all purchasing, financing and refinancing deals, dealt with all business development, client book, taxes etc. I have W2 employees at my business. Plus I worked full time at a 2nd job to maintaining the borrowing capacity for the family: without my second W2 employment there wouldn't be a business at all!
I feel like anytime a woman has a business the presumption is that she got it from an exH. No, I had to buy him out from the business to retain it. He got cash and 401k, I got the business as contributed more personal time, funds and efforts in its' development and was more fit to manage it (as officialized by the judge).

I don't have an "attitude" about money. Wanting an equal is not an attitude: it's a starting point because I've invested many years of my life in climbing to where I am here right now. And I want to be with someone driven, not a "couch professor".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

Listen, if you want to date a rich guy, you need to ask yourself what you bring to the table OTHER THAN MONEY. That guy is not interested in the money. And most definitely that guy is not going to be interested in someone who got some passive income in a divorce settlement.

You can meet all sorts of rich guys if you think for a minute: the country club, opera, art galleries, boating, etc. etc. But getting someone financially compatible to be interested is a whole other story, and your attitude about money is not going to help.

Here's the list of things I can offer to a man:I look good was modeling in my teens, pretty good in sex (my exH "strayed" on the 12th year of relationship which is a longer than average timeframe for a relationship statistically). I can cook for a family every day and entertain throwing parties, can discuss interesting books, finances, world markets, politics, art, sports (to a limited extent). Also I can fix toilets, internet at home, clean pools and notice when it leaks, order many specialty contractors' jobs for the properties, supervise construction etc. I can be supportive of his career by becoming a new "default" parent/step mom to his kids from prior marriage. I can still have a child (dont mind adopt or use donor egg but definitely would carry HIS child up to age 50). With kids I know how to teach the to swim (can write a swimming training set up to sectionals level); can teach them 2 languages, economics, math including AP level; check HW, address special needs by doing visual, speech and small motor exercise; have endless patience to build legos with boys. I dance, play piano, swim and go to a gym. Also I know government contracting if he's a Fed but it's not particular interesting topic to me.

Is it too little for a man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m female in my late 40s and make $500k. My kids are taken care of and their father makes just under $1M.

I get what you’re looking for—someone who can keep up with you financially and culturally. It’s expensive to travel to Europe for 2 weeks in summer, spend 2 weeks skiing in the winter, and have a few long weekends. You’re future partner needs to be able to pay their own way. People on DCUM are so quick to tell women who want a more extravagant lifestyle to get their own money. Well, you have your own money. I don’t see why what you’re looking for is unreasonable. However, in the DC area it’s probably not realistic. You need to look in NY or Silicon Valley.

Vomit. And yes, you are right. Those men are not in DC. Which is why I told a family member to leave 20 years ago...and he did and now very wealthy.

What is there to vomit about?

You live in an unrealistic bubble about what matters. It is especially disgusting since you have money and waste it on “lifestyle” and BS appearances.

Lady, stocks are on sale. You’re an idiot. There are plenty of index funds that will do very very well if you buy in now.

Sorry. Money does matter. It's all well and good to be idealistic that love conquers all. And then reality creeps in and life is expensive. How many people on DCUM outsource everything that they can? That's not trivial money. If OP wants to travel then that's what's important to her. You many consider it a waste on "lifestyle" but at 40 with a grown child, what do you think she should be doing? Her kid is off to college, she has her retirement money already. I have no idea what sort of non wasteful lifestyle expenses you think she should be spending her money on.

Investing it. Not spending 40k a year on travel and 15k on country club memberships. It is vapid.

Ok here: hi , go ahead tell me where I should be investing. I am open for your ideas. I personally couldn’t find anything better than CDs and waiting out for housing crash sitting on cash for the next 2 years. So please, tell me your secret stocks. I exited stocks in the fall

You are an idiot. Stocks are on sale. There are plenty of vanguard index funds to invest in that will bounce back in the future anybody who invest should know that they are playing the long game and you are stupid to sell stocks in the fall. Dumb.

A "home grown trader" who is so psychotic and reactive about stocks won't be a good financial or social match for me.

Signed OP.

You are responding to a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m female in my late 40s and make $500k. My kids are taken care of and their father makes just under $1M.

I get what you’re looking for—someone who can keep up with you financially and culturally. It’s expensive to travel to Europe for 2 weeks in summer, spend 2 weeks skiing in the winter, and have a few long weekends. You’re future partner needs to be able to pay their own way. People on DCUM are so quick to tell women who want a more extravagant lifestyle to get their own money. Well, you have your own money. I don’t see why what you’re looking for is unreasonable. However, in the DC area it’s probably not realistic. You need to look in NY or Silicon Valley.

Vomit. And yes, you are right. Those men are not in DC. Which is why I told a family member to leave 20 years ago...and he did and now very wealthy.

What is there to vomit about?

You live in an unrealistic bubble about what matters. It is especially disgusting since you have money and waste it on “lifestyle” and BS appearances.

Lady, stocks are on sale. You’re an idiot. There are plenty of index funds that will do very very well if you buy in now.

Sorry. Money does matter. It's all well and good to be idealistic that love conquers all. And then reality creeps in and life is expensive. How many people on DCUM outsource everything that they can? That's not trivial money. If OP wants to travel then that's what's important to her. You many consider it a waste on "lifestyle" but at 40 with a grown child, what do you think she should be doing? Her kid is off to college, she has her retirement money already. I have no idea what sort of non wasteful lifestyle expenses you think she should be spending her money on.

Investing it. Not spending 40k a year on travel and 15k on country club memberships. It is vapid.

Ok here: hi , go ahead tell me where I should be investing. I am open for your ideas. I personally couldn’t find anything better than CDs and waiting out for housing crash sitting on cash for the next 2 years. So please, tell me your secret stocks. I exited stocks in the fall

You are an idiot. Stocks are on sale. There are plenty of vanguard index funds to invest in that will bounce back in the future anybody who invest should know that they are playing the long game and you are stupid to sell stocks in the fall. Dumb.

They will fall this week again, you'll see. With Putin dumping all the USD back into market artificially keeping national currency overvalued, Eastern Europeans (Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Baltic states) all selling assets and bringing USD to the US consumers, Russia default looming and another interest rate hike in the fall, staying away from stock is only choice.

I keep my stocks for 10 to 20 years. Who cares about next week?

I hope you are not older than 35 y.o. and are able to afford not ever recalibrate your portfolio, keep it in stocks and don't maintain a healthy cushion of bonds, CDs, REITs and cash. If you are already 55, you are screwed and have to work for the next 15 years to recover, while I (OP) am enjoying my travels.

I am your age, well diversified, and much smarter than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

Listen, if you want to date a rich guy, you need to ask yourself what you bring to the table OTHER THAN MONEY. That guy is not interested in the money. And most definitely that guy is not going to be interested in someone who got some passive income in a divorce settlement.

You can meet all sorts of rich guys if you think for a minute: the country club, opera, art galleries, boating, etc. etc. But getting someone financially compatible to be interested is a whole other story, and your attitude about money is not going to help.

I didn't get a "passive income" in divorce, here's what shows your prejudice to women in general. It is my business since the very beginning. It's not a passive income. I've always had this business, developed and grew it over the course of marriage having a much higher involvement than my exH. I repaid nearly $1.5mm collaterized loans; had personal and credit card debt during constructions, was a signatory on all purchasing, financing and refinancing deals, dealt with all business development, client book, taxes etc. I have W2 employees at my business. Plus I worked full time at a 2nd job to maintaining the borrowing capacity for the family: without my second W2 employment there wouldn't be a business at all!
I feel like anytime a woman has a business the presumption is that she got it from an exH. No, I had to buy him out from the business to retain it. He got cash and 401k, I got the business as contributed more personal time, funds and efforts in its' development and was more fit to manage it (as officialized by the judge).

I don't have an "attitude" about money. Wanting an equal is not an attitude: it's a starting point because I've invested many years of my life in climbing to where I am here right now. And I want to be with someone driven, not a "couch professor".

You do have an attitude about money and every single post you’ve been completely transactional about a relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I was making more than my exH (in business) than he was making at his corporate career. Plus I was the default parent while he was out of country 100 days/year. You are terribly prejudiced and don't respect women's contribution in marriage. My exH was kind of similar, thought his position at corporate ladder was placing me so much below (by the end of the marriage). It gave him a sense he could go around f.k different "charming" women. He would never recognize that he achieved his corporate titles thanks to me being a default parent and him having a full freedom). I married him when he was a regular specialist.

Yes, I fought in divorce and proved my contribution was worthy of my settlement, and took the whole business from him. He can enjoy his title and 401k. Kudos to judges.

Too bad the judges can't force a rich guy to be interested in you.

I am glad a rich married guy who posted above and writes just like my exH would not be interested. I weed out these narc types on a spot.

Listen, if you want to date a rich guy, you need to ask yourself what you bring to the table OTHER THAN MONEY. That guy is not interested in the money. And most definitely that guy is not going to be interested in someone who got some passive income in a divorce settlement.

You can meet all sorts of rich guys if you think for a minute: the country club, opera, art galleries, boating, etc. etc. But getting someone financially compatible to be interested is a whole other story, and your attitude about money is not going to help.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I could have still held on to my exH. I was the one who filed for divorce. He was just fine living his way while being comfortably married and having things done for him. Very convenient to have one life here and a second “work wife”. Just wasn’t for me it was affecting my well being having different women involved in my marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course income and wealth matter. It's disingenuous to pretend they don't. Lots of misogyny here trying to tear down middle aged women and tell them they have little value. 20's and early 30's women usually don't date 40 something year old men with children unless they're damaged. The people saying OP is competing with the never been married 25 year olds are off their rocker.

OP, tell all your friends that you want to date and ask them to set you up. See if your country club has any singles events. That's likely the best way for you to meet someone with the qualities you're looking for. Try an expensive singles vacation abroad if that doesn't work. The key is to do activities with a higher cost of entry so the men there can likely afford it.

If you do OLD, then don't post your wealth or expectations. You could attract some scary scam artists after your money.

Good luck and I hope you find what you're looking for!

No one said it does not matter. But at OP's age, her expectations are unrealistic. Most men in their 40s are married already and very slim pickings. And very wealthy men are unlikely to want someone her age. I say this as a woman her age.

Didn't you think that maybe it's you who has a problem with male attention, not OP?

I have my pick of the litter, thanks. But I also don’t expect a man with these income requirements either. I only date men with graduate degrees in professional careers though but many of them don’t have the kind of wealth OP is after. Her problem is the insane wealth requirement that most people just do not have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I could have still held on to my exH. I was the one who filed for divorce. He was just fine living his way while being comfortably married and having things done for him. Very convenient to have one life here and a second “work wife”. Just wasn’t for me it was affecting my well being having different women involved in my marriage

I’m a woman but it’s pretty obvious why he was cheating. He probably didn’t feel loved and probably felt that you were with him for money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m female in my late 40s and make $500k. My kids are taken care of and their father makes just under $1M.

I get what you’re looking for—someone who can keep up with you financially and culturally. It’s expensive to travel to Europe for 2 weeks in summer, spend 2 weeks skiing in the winter, and have a few long weekends. You’re future partner needs to be able to pay their own way. People on DCUM are so quick to tell women who want a more extravagant lifestyle to get their own money. Well, you have your own money. I don’t see why what you’re looking for is unreasonable. However, in the DC area it’s probably not realistic. You need to look in NY or Silicon Valley.

Vomit. And yes, you are right. Those men are not in DC. Which is why I told a family member to leave 20 years ago...and he did and now very wealthy.

What is there to vomit about?

You live in an unrealistic bubble about what matters. It is especially disgusting since you have money and waste it on “lifestyle” and BS appearances.

Lady, stocks are on sale. You’re an idiot. There are plenty of index funds that will do very very well if you buy in now.

Sorry. Money does matter. It's all well and good to be idealistic that love conquers all. And then reality creeps in and life is expensive. How many people on DCUM outsource everything that they can? That's not trivial money. If OP wants to travel then that's what's important to her. You many consider it a waste on "lifestyle" but at 40 with a grown child, what do you think she should be doing? Her kid is off to college, she has her retirement money already. I have no idea what sort of non wasteful lifestyle expenses you think she should be spending her money on.

Investing it. Not spending 40k a year on travel and 15k on country club memberships. It is vapid.

Ok here: hi , go ahead tell me where I should be investing. I am open for your ideas. I personally couldn’t find anything better than CDs and waiting out for housing crash sitting on cash for the next 2 years. So please, tell me your secret stocks. I exited stocks in the fall

You are an idiot. Stocks are on sale. There are plenty of vanguard index funds to invest in that will bounce back in the future anybody who invest should know that they are playing the long game and you are stupid to sell stocks in the fall. Dumb.

They will fall this week again, you'll see. With Putin dumping all the USD back into market artificially keeping national currency overvalued, Eastern Europeans (Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Baltic states) all selling assets and bringing USD to the US consumers, Russia default looming and another interest rate hike in the fall, staying away from stock is only choice.

I keep my stocks for 10 to 20 years. Who cares about next week?

I hope you are not older than 35 y.o. and are able to afford not ever recalibrate your portfolio, keep it in stocks and don't maintain a healthy cushion of bonds, CDs, REITs and cash. If you are already 55, you are screwed and have to work for the next 15 years to recover, while I (OP) am enjoying my travels.

I am your age, well diversified, and much smarter than you.

A smart person won’t provide a self-assessment of smartness on an anonymous forum where there are no way to validate either anyone’s smartness or quality of portfolios. I am doing good financially that all which matters. Good luck with your stocks !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I could have still held on to my exH. I was the one who filed for divorce. He was just fine living his way while being comfortably married and having things done for him. Very convenient to have one life here and a second “work wife”. Just wasn’t for me it was affecting my well being having different women involved in my marriage

I’m a woman but it’s pretty obvious why he was cheating. He probably didn’t feel loved and probably felt that you were with him for money.

Maybe he was with me for money, didn’t you think other way around ? He didn’t “leave” either. He was already divorced once (our marriage was second for him and first for me), and he cheated on his first wife as well. So no, men who don’t cheat just don’t cheat. Even when the wives are fat and angry. His AP was his married subordinate and slept with him for hefty consulting contracts he gave her through his job. I filed for divorce when it was discovered. That’s the story and it was far from being a purely romantic arrangement for his AP.

I don’t have a “wealth” requirement: I have income requirement. Assets and income are two different things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy who would satisfy OP's criteria (more than, actually), and I would not be interested in the least. I have more than enough money to entertain myself, so I would rather have the company of someone more charming. I assume that was the case with OP's husband as well. If she couldn't hold onto one rich guy, why would she hold onto another?

Also, most rich guys aren't too impressed with a mid-level GS who happened into a lot of money through divorce. Kind of gives me the willies.

OP here: I could have still held on to my exH. I was the one who filed for divorce. He was just fine living his way while being comfortably married and having things done for him. Very convenient to have one life here and a second “work wife”. Just wasn’t for me it was affecting my well being having different women involved in my marriage

I’m a woman but it’s pretty obvious why he was cheating. He probably didn’t feel loved and probably felt that you were with him for money.

Maybe he was with me for money, didn’t you think other way around ? He didn’t “leave” either. He was already divorced once (our marriage was second for him and first for me), and he cheated on his first wife as well. So no, men who don’t cheat just don’t cheat. Even when the wives are fat and angry. His AP was his married subordinate and slept with him for hefty consulting contracts he gave her through his job. I filed for divorce when it was discovered. That’s the story and it was far from being a purely romantic arrangement for his AP.

I don’t have a “wealth” requirement: I have income requirement. Assets and income are two different things.

Income requirement of 300+ a year at your age is unrealistic because most of those men are already married and not on the dating market and the ones who have that kind of money are not interested in someone who is 43 years old usually. If you want to have an actual partner who cares about you and you have this kind of money the amount of income they have should not be relevant.