Who is unreasonable here: Friend A or Friend B?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP your treadmill is only worth what someone is willing to pay, not what you paid for it. When I sold ours, I got a ton of responses on facebook marketplace so I probably could have sold it for more. No one is going to pay $1K for a used treadmill. So, you either accept her offer or donate it if you don't want to take it with you.

I don’t think op realizes that a treadmill is not such a high value item as she thinks. Same as a weight set or rower. We have a peloton, treadmill, rower and weight set. I doubt anyone wants our used gym. I would not even bother trying to sell it

This thread is not about the value of a used treadmill. Did you even read it?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Friend B always seems to get what she wants, doesn't she?

She kind of does. And maybe that's why she is now on a reduced budget, if that's true. When they bought the ponies a few months ago, they had their saddles and other gear shipped from the US; her daughter told me that her saddle cost $5000, and they have a few of these. I know my friend's husband told her they were NOT paying to ship the equestrian gear in, but she went ahead and did it anyway, so maybe he reduced her summer spending limit or something.

For me, the $1000 I had originally wanted for the treadmill would go to groceries or bills. I'm really disappointed in myself for feeling so angry about this because I think it is going to ruin our friendship. She just texted me a string of hearts and "I am so happy to be getting a treadmill at home, I really appreciate this." I don't know if I can get over this. I don't think her concept of "can't afford this" is the same as mine.

I would NEVER do that to a friend particularly a friend who has much less than me. It would be an opportunity for me to help my friend even more so knowing you probably have expenses related to your move. She's a taker and I would be po'd at her. You don't do that to people you love. What an opportunist.

I dunno. It sounds like a miscommunication since the friend texted her hearts and an appreciation text.

If I thought someone was giving me something, I would thank her and be happy too. If I knew how upset the friend was, I obviously would not take the item.

You have reading comprehension issues. The woman harangued her to get the treadmill for free. She texted her hearts and that makes everything right? Are you for real?

Did you not read that that used to hang out daily and that the friend wanted to keep in touch and go visit OP? You read the parts you want. I could be that other friend, completely clueless about some item that I thought my good friend was giving to me. I already have a treadmill and I wouldn’t want this.

Did you not read that the friend and her husband came to get the treadmill and treated op as less than. Op also didn't expect the friend to "peddle" the treadmill for her. Op's friend knows a lot more people because of their kids/interests so she could have asked or let people in that group know about the treadmill. Any friend would have done that for a friend under the stress of moving. At no point do we read that the friend every helped op.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:It does seem sketchy that B’s DH’s colleague would back out in such a way that benefits B, and that DH is shrewd (if this assessment is from OP, not sure). It does almost seem like a set up, but of course this is speculation.

I agree with the PP’s question: did she swoop in an opportunistic fashion or did she sincerely empathize? If she swooped in without at least saying something like, that sucks, then I can see why you would feel resentful.

Is she generally a good friend? Sometimes we can all act in a greedy or regrettable manner. If she’s overall a good friend, then maybe some distance will help.

If she’s not been a good friend, then do what you want: ghost, say you found another buyer, etc.

RE: the $2k, to not feel so bad about it, you can look at it like a gym membership. $167/mo for a gym membership is not out of bounds.

OP here. Yes, she did swoop in as soon as she learned that the buyer backed out. She almost immediately had reserved movers and someone to disassemble it tomorrow, literally within 10 minutes of the conversation about the buyer backing out (this makes me wonder if she had already prearranged this because she knew before me that the buyer was backing out, and if so, what was her involvement in that, though not sure how fair that is). Our other friend has pointed out that she could have offered to message her friend group while I was dealing with packing, etc, to help me find another last minute buyer because she knows a lot of expats with the means to pay for it (her kids stable/pony friends' parents, etc) but her priority seemed to be locking down the free treadmill for herself as quickly as possible.

I don't know. I am not great with confrontation, so I will probably just remain very guarded and not talk much when she comes tomorrow to take it. Then I will let the friendship fade.

Thanks for the replies here. I have found myself in situations in the past where I let someone take advantage of me. It's my own character flaw or personal issue, I guess. I am going to try to be more guarded in the future.

I’m sorry but it is pretty ridiculous for you to expect her to help you find a buyer. I can’t imagine someone wanting me to reach out to my friends to sell something used for them.

I think you should just take this treadmill with you back home if it means so much to you.

I am a rich SAHM. DH lets me spend what I want and if I wanted this, I would have bought it from you. I don’t normally like to buy items used. I would rather buy the treadmill new. I once had a friend who was moving who had a bike and was moving. I tried out her bike and it was ok but I didn’t love it. She wanted $100 for the $500 bike. When she moved, she did not give me the bike. I would have taken it for free but she didn’t offer and I didn’t ask. She would rather take the bike than give it to me for free. We are still friends. No big deal.

Not all SAHM situations are the same. Some husbands are very controlling with how the money is spent.

I DIDN'T expect her to help me find a buyer. Our other friend pointed out that it would have been more, well, friend-like, if she had OFFERED to do that herself, knowing the buyer had withdrawn and I am spending the last day packing.

The treadmill itself isn't that important to me. The relationship with my friend was the important thing. The treadmill issue is just an episode in the friendship.

Anyway, the issue here, I see, is that I need to be less weak and more careful in choosing my friends.

The more you post, the more I’m with friend B. There was never any way she could win with you. You clearly never liked her, and that’s a ridiculous expectation btw.

We got a taker posting here. They always pop up in these posts to justify their selfish ways.

Not at all. Everyone on here seems to miss the point that these two hung out daily. OP is also very judgmental: she wrote that her friend was “a kept woman” and seems to think she knows everything about how their finances and marriage are handled (she also insulted the husband).

Then OP wants her friend to peddle an item for her that the friend asked for. It’s the friend’s right to ask for the item, and it’s OO’s right to say no. Yet, OP is pissed because her friend couldn’t read her mind. Who in their right mind would do that for a friend? No most people on here would be starting threads on here saying…the nerve…

It sounds like OP wanted a pity party, and of course DCUM will always oblige.

Not only that but the friend is categorized as a “taker” for trading on their friendship to get something for free but the OP isn’t being considered a taker despite her trading on their friendship to get her “rich” friend to pay an amount no one else was willing to pay for a used item. I’ve been there before, a friend offers to sell me something at an inflated price hoping I’ll go for it - but it would never sell on Facebook marketplace for that much. I don’t operate a charity.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:It does seem sketchy that B’s DH’s colleague would back out in such a way that benefits B, and that DH is shrewd (if this assessment is from OP, not sure). It does almost seem like a set up, but of course this is speculation.

I agree with the PP’s question: did she swoop in an opportunistic fashion or did she sincerely empathize? If she swooped in without at least saying something like, that sucks, then I can see why you would feel resentful.

Is she generally a good friend? Sometimes we can all act in a greedy or regrettable manner. If she’s overall a good friend, then maybe some distance will help.

If she’s not been a good friend, then do what you want: ghost, say you found another buyer, etc.

RE: the $2k, to not feel so bad about it, you can look at it like a gym membership. $167/mo for a gym membership is not out of bounds.

OP here. Yes, she did swoop in as soon as she learned that the buyer backed out. She almost immediately had reserved movers and someone to disassemble it tomorrow, literally within 10 minutes of the conversation about the buyer backing out (this makes me wonder if she had already prearranged this because she knew before me that the buyer was backing out, and if so, what was her involvement in that, though not sure how fair that is). Our other friend has pointed out that she could have offered to message her friend group while I was dealing with packing, etc, to help me find another last minute buyer because she knows a lot of expats with the means to pay for it (her kids stable/pony friends' parents, etc) but her priority seemed to be locking down the free treadmill for herself as quickly as possible.

I don't know. I am not great with confrontation, so I will probably just remain very guarded and not talk much when she comes tomorrow to take it. Then I will let the friendship fade.

Thanks for the replies here. I have found myself in situations in the past where I let someone take advantage of me. It's my own character flaw or personal issue, I guess. I am going to try to be more guarded in the future.

I’m sorry but it is pretty ridiculous for you to expect her to help you find a buyer. I can’t imagine someone wanting me to reach out to my friends to sell something used for them.

I think you should just take this treadmill with you back home if it means so much to you.

I am a rich SAHM. DH lets me spend what I want and if I wanted this, I would have bought it from you. I don’t normally like to buy items used. I would rather buy the treadmill new. I once had a friend who was moving who had a bike and was moving. I tried out her bike and it was ok but I didn’t love it. She wanted $100 for the $500 bike. When she moved, she did not give me the bike. I would have taken it for free but she didn’t offer and I didn’t ask. She would rather take the bike than give it to me for free. We are still friends. No big deal.

Not all SAHM situations are the same. Some husbands are very controlling with how the money is spent.

I DIDN'T expect her to help me find a buyer. Our other friend pointed out that it would have been more, well, friend-like, if she had OFFERED to do that herself, knowing the buyer had withdrawn and I am spending the last day packing.

The treadmill itself isn't that important to me. The relationship with my friend was the important thing. The treadmill issue is just an episode in the friendship.

Anyway, the issue here, I see, is that I need to be less weak and more careful in choosing my friends.

The more you post, the more I’m with friend B. There was never any way she could win with you. You clearly never liked her, and that’s a ridiculous expectation btw.

We got a taker posting here. They always pop up in these posts to justify their selfish ways.

Not at all. Everyone on here seems to miss the point that these two hung out daily. OP is also very judgmental: she wrote that her friend was “a kept woman” and seems to think she knows everything about how their finances and marriage are handled (she also insulted the husband).

Then OP wants her friend to peddle an item for her that the friend asked for. It’s the friend’s right to ask for the item, and it’s OO’s right to say no. Yet, OP is pissed because her friend couldn’t read her mind. Who in their right mind would do that for a friend? No most people on here would be starting threads on here saying…the nerve…

It sounds like OP wanted a pity party, and of course DCUM will always oblige.

Not only that but the friend is categorized as a “taker” for trading on their friendship to get something for free but the OP isn’t being considered a taker despite her trading on their friendship to get her “rich” friend to pay an amount no one else was willing to pay for a used item. I’ve been there before, a friend offers to sell me something at an inflated price hoping I’ll go for it - but it would never sell on Facebook marketplace for that much. I don’t operate a charity.

+1. This whole story boils down to the fact that OP perceived her friend to have more money than her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you had an alternative buyer, that would be a different situation. You don’t. The options are give it to a stranger or give it to one of your best friends. Seems like a really obvious answer to me.

As for your friend, maybe her spending habits have gotten her in trouble and she needs to cut back. I’d accept what she told you about her financial status.

Good luck with the move!

I think this is beside the point though. Friend B was wanting the treadmill for free since the beginning, even when Friend A had the potential to sell it. That, to me, is the part that would annoy me. Especially since Friend B has so much more money than Friend A. If nothing else, and I were Friend B, I would have paid for the treadmill because I could afford it and my friend could use the money. I'm in a similar situation to Friend B (literally just paid for the second of two ponies yesterday...) and I do things for my friends all the time to the extent I can. This would have been a no brainer for me. So I think Friend B is a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just to be clear, you bought a treadmill you should not have spent money on? She asked for it, and then you agreed?

"Should not have spent money on?" We live in one of the most polluted cities on the planet, so exercise outdoors is not possible, I work full time and would not be able to get to a gym most days, and I do prioritize my health. I cannot afford to NOT make this priority. It isn't as if I'm going bankrupt from buying it, just that the money would have meant a lot to me in reselling before I move.

But, yes, I reluctantly agreed after the other option fell through. That is on me. If I could go back, I would have just lied and said I found a seller in my building for the sake of saving our friendship, I guess.

Honestly I don't think this would have solved the problem. Sure, it would have lessened the sting since she wouldn't have ended up with the treadmill, but in reading your post, the thing that got to me was her insistence that you give her the treadmill for free from the start. That was aggressive and rude and it showed what kind of person she is. If you had ended up selling the treadmill to someone else, you would have had cash in your pocket and been happy that she didn't get it for free, but it wouldn't change at all who she is. So I think that's the real issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, ignore the people who are mad about you buying the treadmill. That's beside the point.

I want to really break down your friend's behavior here, to understand what about it is problematic.

It is fine she asked for the treadmill for free. She didn't know your precise situation. It never hurts to ask.

But you said no, you needed to sell it, because the money was important for your move. She heard this, right? You said "no, I can't give it to you, I need the money," right?

And then she proceeded to ignore your "no" and plead and harass you about it for months. THIS is the problematic behavior. Not her wanting the treadmill for free. Who cares what her finances are. Who cares what your finances are. The point is that she asked, you said no, she refused to accept that.

And then when your buyer backed out, was she empathetic? Did she care how this would impact you negatively? Was she even apologetic when she "offered" again to take it for free? I sense no. She was victorious. She got what she wanted.

Ignore the financial factors here. They feel important but they are not. I have seen a friendship play out like this even when the pair have the same finances.

She is not merely a user or an opportunity. She is aggressive. She does not see you as a person in the same way she thinks of herself as a person. You are a resource from which she can extract what she wants-- companionship, stuff. She will never treat you as an equal. She does not respect you or care for you.

Move on. People like this just cause strife over and over. You will never get out of this relationship what you put in.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been an expat. There is a mail order bride vibe sometimes. Man is maybe American or British, older, not a great catch except for money. Woman is younger, better looking, from a poorer country. I had a neighbor like this, she was asking for my help to get some software on her computer, she said she couldn’t ask her husband. She couldn’t get the $60 or whatever for the software and we were living in a very nice gated community. Maybe she was a liar and just trying to get money from me but l don’t think so.

OP said they're both American expats.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:It does seem sketchy that B’s DH’s colleague would back out in such a way that benefits B, and that DH is shrewd (if this assessment is from OP, not sure). It does almost seem like a set up, but of course this is speculation.

I agree with the PP’s question: did she swoop in an opportunistic fashion or did she sincerely empathize? If she swooped in without at least saying something like, that sucks, then I can see why you would feel resentful.

Is she generally a good friend? Sometimes we can all act in a greedy or regrettable manner. If she’s overall a good friend, then maybe some distance will help.

If she’s not been a good friend, then do what you want: ghost, say you found another buyer, etc.

RE: the $2k, to not feel so bad about it, you can look at it like a gym membership. $167/mo for a gym membership is not out of bounds.

OP here. Yes, she did swoop in as soon as she learned that the buyer backed out. She almost immediately had reserved movers and someone to disassemble it tomorrow, literally within 10 minutes of the conversation about the buyer backing out (this makes me wonder if she had already prearranged this because she knew before me that the buyer was backing out, and if so, what was her involvement in that, though not sure how fair that is). Our other friend has pointed out that she could have offered to message her friend group while I was dealing with packing, etc, to help me find another last minute buyer because she knows a lot of expats with the means to pay for it (her kids stable/pony friends' parents, etc) but her priority seemed to be locking down the free treadmill for herself as quickly as possible.

I don't know. I am not great with confrontation, so I will probably just remain very guarded and not talk much when she comes tomorrow to take it. Then I will let the friendship fade.

Thanks for the replies here. I have found myself in situations in the past where I let someone take advantage of me. It's my own character flaw or personal issue, I guess. I am going to try to be more guarded in the future.

I’m sorry but it is pretty ridiculous for you to expect her to help you find a buyer. I can’t imagine someone wanting me to reach out to my friends to sell something used for them.

I think you should just take this treadmill with you back home if it means so much to you.

I am a rich SAHM. DH lets me spend what I want and if I wanted this, I would have bought it from you. I don’t normally like to buy items used. I would rather buy the treadmill new. I once had a friend who was moving who had a bike and was moving. I tried out her bike and it was ok but I didn’t love it. She wanted $100 for the $500 bike. When she moved, she did not give me the bike. I would have taken it for free but she didn’t offer and I didn’t ask. She would rather take the bike than give it to me for free. We are still friends. No big deal.

Not all SAHM situations are the same. Some husbands are very controlling with how the money is spent.

I DIDN'T expect her to help me find a buyer. Our other friend pointed out that it would have been more, well, friend-like, if she had OFFERED to do that herself, knowing the buyer had withdrawn and I am spending the last day packing.

The treadmill itself isn't that important to me. The relationship with my friend was the important thing. The treadmill issue is just an episode in the friendship.

Anyway, the issue here, I see, is that I need to be less weak and more careful in choosing my friends.

The more you post, the more I’m with friend B. There was never any way she could win with you. You clearly never liked her, and that’s a ridiculous expectation btw.

We got a taker posting here. They always pop up in these posts to justify their selfish ways.

Not at all. Everyone on here seems to miss the point that these two hung out daily. OP is also very judgmental: she wrote that her friend was “a kept woman” and seems to think she knows everything about how their finances and marriage are handled (she also insulted the husband).

Then OP wants her friend to peddle an item for her that the friend asked for. It’s the friend’s right to ask for the item, and it’s OO’s right to say no. Yet, OP is pissed because her friend couldn’t read her mind. Who in their right mind would do that for a friend? No most people on here would be starting threads on here saying…the nerve…

It sounds like OP wanted a pity party, and of course DCUM will always oblige.

Not only that but the friend is categorized as a “taker” for trading on their friendship to get something for free but the OP isn’t being considered a taker despite her trading on their friendship to get her “rich” friend to pay an amount no one else was willing to pay for a used item. I’ve been there before, a friend offers to sell me something at an inflated price hoping I’ll go for it - but it would never sell on Facebook marketplace for that much. I don’t operate a charity.

+1. This whole story boils down to the fact that OP perceived her friend to have more money than her.

Perceived? lmao. Just move on, OP. And drop the selfish B.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It does seem sketchy that B’s DH’s colleague would back out in such a way that benefits B, and that DH is shrewd (if this assessment is from OP, not sure). It does almost seem like a set up, but of course this is speculation.

I agree with the PP’s question: did she swoop in an opportunistic fashion or did she sincerely empathize? If she swooped in without at least saying something like, that sucks, then I can see why you would feel resentful.

Is she generally a good friend? Sometimes we can all act in a greedy or regrettable manner. If she’s overall a good friend, then maybe some distance will help.

If she’s not been a good friend, then do what you want: ghost, say you found another buyer, etc.

RE: the $2k, to not feel so bad about it, you can look at it like a gym membership. $167/mo for a gym membership is not out of bounds.

OP here. Yes, she did swoop in as soon as she learned that the buyer backed out. She almost immediately had reserved movers and someone to disassemble it tomorrow, literally within 10 minutes of the conversation about the buyer backing out (this makes me wonder if she had already prearranged this because she knew before me that the buyer was backing out, and if so, what was her involvement in that, though not sure how fair that is). Our other friend has pointed out that she could have offered to message her friend group while I was dealing with packing, etc, to help me find another last minute buyer because she knows a lot of expats with the means to pay for it (her kids stable/pony friends' parents, etc) but her priority seemed to be locking down the free treadmill for herself as quickly as possible.

I don't know. I am not great with confrontation, so I will probably just remain very guarded and not talk much when she comes tomorrow to take it. Then I will let the friendship fade.

Thanks for the replies here. I have found myself in situations in the past where I let someone take advantage of me. It's my own character flaw or personal issue, I guess. I am going to try to be more guarded in the future.

I’m sorry but it is pretty ridiculous for you to expect her to help you find a buyer. I can’t imagine someone wanting me to reach out to my friends to sell something used for them.

I think you should just take this treadmill with you back home if it means so much to you.

I am a rich SAHM. DH lets me spend what I want and if I wanted this, I would have bought it from you. I don’t normally like to buy items used. I would rather buy the treadmill new. I once had a friend who was moving who had a bike and was moving. I tried out her bike and it was ok but I didn’t love it. She wanted $100 for the $500 bike. When she moved, she did not give me the bike. I would have taken it for free but she didn’t offer and I didn’t ask. She would rather take the bike than give it to me for free. We are still friends. No big deal.

Not all SAHM situations are the same. Some husbands are very controlling with how the money is spent.

Somehow, with every sentence you managed to become even more insufferable. Well done.

[Anonymous]

It's not being selfish or guarded, it is having boundaries. "I'm not giving it away, I am going to continue to search for another buyer until I leave."


+1. As a person who had to learn this skill as an adult, it was important for me to understand that the very nature of my previously boundary-less behavior made boundaries feel like I was being "mean". When your pendulum has always swung so far left, there's a tendency to swing hard right to reset, when the best approach is generally in the middle. And the trick is figuring out why you don't think you deserve courtesy, respect, or however else you define feeling heard. People who are self-assured can say "no" easily, pleasantly, and with no drama. They don't overreact or feel guilt or anger because they understand they're not doing anyone a disservice by protecting themselves. That the world has lots of takers (and lots of generosity too, if you look for it), and recognizing them and responding accordingly doesn't make one a bad person.

The hardest part for me was losing a few long-term friendships I came to realize were largely based on my accommodating behavior that did not benefit me. When I set boundaries those friends were not happy at all, and bailed. I had read a few books on the subject and heeded the advice that people who benefit from using you are not happy when you change the rules, so I was ready for it. But still sad.

It's never too late OP to become someone you're proud of. If this lifetime lesson costs you 2K, maybe it's not truly a loss.

I can really relate to this, and you have offered good advice.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP your treadmill is only worth what someone is willing to pay, not what you paid for it. When I sold ours, I got a ton of responses on facebook marketplace so I probably could have sold it for more. No one is going to pay $1K for a used treadmill. So, you either accept her offer or donate it if you don't want to take it with you.[/quote]

I don’t think op realizes that a treadmill is not such of a high value item as she thinks. Same as a weight set or rower. We have a peloton, treadmill, rower and weight set. I doubt anyone wants our used gym. I would not even bother trying to sell it[/quote]

This thread is not about the value of a used treadmill. Did you even read it?[/quote]

NP, but did you? I agree with the PP.

Part of the basis of OPs argument is that horrible friend somehow scammed her out of money for a high value item. A used treadmill, where ever you are in the world, is a clunky, awkward, low (monetary) value item. The narrative can easily change if you thing the item is worth $1000 on the current market (and OP is hard up up for money) and the item is basically a heavy and cumbersome doorstop that friend is willing to move at no cost, but a moving company and the landlord will charge for.

OP wasn’t able to sell
Her treadmill at a market value, which if she’s been trying to sell for months, is not the price she was asking for. She is basing her whole argument about a friend pulling one over on her, for something with not much value than a pair of socks (as hard as that is to swallow)

[Anonymous]

I Think OP overvalued the treadmill, which is why she couldn’t get anyone to buy it for months.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP here. She's here. She brought her husband for some reason. She knows it is awkward and they are avoiding me. I am fuming.

Yes, it is my fault for saying yes. I am horrible with conflict and am I am going to be a more selfish person in the future.

OP again. Can I just reiterate how irritated I am that she brought her husband and the two of them are now in the room with the treadmill, watching them dismantle it. He didn't even greet me; they walked past me as if I am the help. So, yeah, I guess the PP who observed earlier that the "friendship" is just one of convenience to her was correct.

Anyway, thanks for those who commented here, even to tell me I'm irresponsible (I probably am). This is something I've known I need to work on with myself (learning to back away from friendships that are one-sided). I lost my parents young (in college) and I've long had a tendency to hold onto relationships I should let go because of that, I think. I'm working on it with my online therapist. I'm going to be more selfish and more guarded in my new location.

I think you seem abnormally angry at your friend. If I were picking up some large item, I would take my husband.

I have a treadmill and rower in my basement I want to get rid of. I would gladly give it to a friend.

You seem to think your treadmill is worth more than it is worth. You should have just sold it for $50 or $200 or whatever price someone would have paid for it. $200 seems very petty to be this upset and angry over.

Because the "friend" is an a-turd.

She should have at least offered to take OP out for a nice meal, or given her a couple hundred dollars, or done something. OP didn't tell the friend that she'd be doing a favor to take the treadmill off her hands. The friend was being a vulture. (No offense to actual vultures, who are fine animals and an important part of the ecosystem.)

I must have read OP’s post differently. The friend seemed to want to continue the friendship, visit OP, asked OP what is wrong, etc.

OP seems hyper focused on the treadmill that she is seething with resentment. Maybe I’m missing something.

I had a friend who moved out of the country recently. Her family were vultures. I guess it is ok if it is family but not a friend. She had furniture she spent thousands of dollars on that she would get hundreds for (10%).

I went and took a bunch of stuff.

This is what happens when people move. My friend absolutely was annoyed at how “greedy” her family was. They still are family.

So you happily joined in with the other vultures? Are you proud of yourself? One of the worst things family members do to one another is "treat each other like family." People use that phrase to excuse a lot of rude and selfish behavior. We should treat our family more like honored guests since they are so important instead of treating them less than.

We have a seven figure income. I am not a vulture. I have taken some kitchen supplies when I was in grad school and recently, my friend gave me some board games. They wanted me to take larger items but I didn’t want them. One friend wanted to sell her dining table to me and I didn’t want it. It was a very expensive table.

lol

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP your treadmill is only worth what someone is willing to pay, not what you paid for it. When I sold ours, I got a ton of responses on facebook marketplace so I probably could have sold it for more. No one is going to pay $1K for a used treadmill. So, you either accept her offer or donate it if you don't want to take it with you.[/quote]

I don’t think op realizes that a treadmill is not such of a high value item as she thinks. Same as a weight set or rower. We have a peloton, treadmill, rower and weight set. I doubt anyone wants our used gym. I would not even bother trying to sell it[/quote]

This thread is not about the value of a used treadmill. Did you even read it?[/quote]

NP, but did you? I agree with the PP.

Part of the basis of OPs argument is that horrible friend somehow scammed her out of money for a high value item. A used treadmill, where ever you are in the world, is a clunky, awkward, low (monetary) value item. The narrative can easily change if you thing the item is worth $1000 on the current market (and OP is hard up up for money) and the item is basically a heavy and cumbersome doorstop that friend is willing to move at no cost, but a moving company and the landlord will charge for.

OP wasn’t able to sell
Her treadmill at a market value, which if she’s been trying to sell for months, is not the price she was asking for. She is basing her whole argument about a friend pulling one over on her, for something with not much value than a pair of socks (as hard as that is to swallow)


[/quote]

Yes, the entire thread is based on the fact that the friend is a taker and greedy. I’m not sure the OP would be this offended if she was asking her friend to take an aquarium or smoker or other high ticket item that she could not take with her.

I gave my friend a toy kitchen, tool table and train table and she was ecstatic. These are large low value items. If I was angry and upset friend was not giving me money for it, I don’t think she would know. She told me how excited her kids were and probably also send me a string of hearts and a thank you.