How to not “let yourself go”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying. This is called DC urban MOM. Probably 95% of us here have kids. You aren’t special. You do not prioritize working out or taking care of yourself and that’s why you’ve let yourself go. It’s not that you’re busy and we aren’t (everyone is busy) or that you love your kids and we don’t. You just don’t do it.

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

I dress nicely because I work hard and like to. I don’t slum around in yoga pants and baggy tees. It’s not hard to put a little makeup on and take care of your hair.

I don’t do this for anyone but me and that’s probably the main predictor of who will let themselves go and who won’t. I care about myself enough to want to be strong and healthy and capable. I like to look good for me. I’m not willing to compromise on that and then look in the mirror and hate myself.

Make time or don’t. Give a shit about yourself or don’t. That is all it comes down to.

Well you kids watch TV and getting up at 4am is psycho.

I go to bed around 8:30. Get up at 4, drink coffee, read websites, plan or grade for the day, then workout. Your idea of psycho is just kids watching 2 tv shows and basic ass normal self care and being on top of stuff.

Bed at 8:30... r u 5 years old... No sex typical DCUM... but I get my workout in.

I go to bed early... so I can wake up early..... and get shit done.

A SAHM who won’t leave her kids alone for 5 seconds so she can justify being overweight and skinny might not understand how that works. Also, I never said I was married so pretty weird of you to assume I’m in a sexless marriage because I bother to workout.

Oh here we go ... you are a SAHM hater. Okay... that makes sense. Okay super woman, show everybody how great you are. You give the rest of us WOHM a bad name.

Oh your not married... that is why you work out.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you really do want to take care of yourself - Here are some things to incorporate:

1. Weight watchers, Noom, etc... : pick a plan for reducing calorie consumption and stick with it (this doesn't take time out of your life- just discipline)

2. When you are with kids get outside and exercise with them- have backyard races, do jumping jacks and jump rope, swim at the pool, etc. find ways to do stuff with them

3. Get a piece of stationary cardio equipment for your home. Put it in the area your kids play and/or watch TV. While they are doing their thing, you do yours.... Kids need independent play- not always with a parent.

4. Have a beauty routine night once a week. When kids go to bed, you put outfits together for next couple of days, do your nails, do a face mask, etc...

5. Get sleep- don't waste too much time browsing the web (like DCUM which is a time suck for me)

DON'T feel bad about yourself, just do some things that make you feel better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying. This is called DC urban MOM. Probably 95% of us here have kids. You aren’t special. You do not prioritize working out or taking care of yourself and that’s why you’ve let yourself go. It’s not that you’re busy and we aren’t (everyone is busy) or that you love your kids and we don’t. You just don’t do it.

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

I dress nicely because I work hard and like to. I don’t slum around in yoga pants and baggy tees. It’s not hard to put a little makeup on and take care of your hair.

I don’t do this for anyone but me and that’s probably the main predictor of who will let themselves go and who won’t. I care about myself enough to want to be strong and healthy and capable. I like to look good for me. I’m not willing to compromise on that and then look in the mirror and hate myself.

Make time or don’t. Give a shit about yourself or don’t. That is all it comes down to.

Well you kids watch TV and getting up at 4am is psycho.

Dp. Who cares if kids watch tv while a parent works out? A 20 HIIT workout even 2 days a week, combined with some strength training and healthful eating does wonders. Waking up at 4 am is not psycho, if that is the only option. At some point, you have to make yourself a priority or you will physically decline beyond repair. Waking early to work out (or spend time for yourself) is absolutely worth it.

No... waking up at 4am is seriously unhealthy and will take it's toll in other ways. Just because your outer body looks good does not mean your mind is good.

I'm not plopping my kids in front of the TV so I can "work out" I will take them for a hike. Which may not give me a beach body but is better for overall health... and I spend time with the kdis.

In life priorities shift... parents get sick.. you gonna do pilates in the hospital room? Jeez, relax... you don't have to maintain such a crazy schedule to not "let yourself go" and really, letting yourself go a little is amuch healthier... body and soul.

NP but come on. You can hike with the kids AND work out - small bursts of TV time is not going to negatively impact your kids. I'd say my entire generation of 80s kids grew up with cartoons and we are all just fine, and my kids don't watch nearly enough tv as I used to after school and on Saturday mornings.

I used to be on the elliptical at 8 pm after I put my three little ones to bed. I'm not a morning person so no 4 am wakes for me, but I did it on the opposite end of my day. And yes, I still played outside with my kids and spent time with them. A hike with my kids simply wouldn't qualify as a workout for me.

You mean the generation that crashed the economy with bad mortgages, brought us Crack and gave us Trump?

Please do not hold the 80's up as anything to model. Diet coke and Marlboro lights was a diet.

It's fine if it is "not a workout for you" but nobody wants to be you.

Your post is defending a woman that posted "The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying"

Go for it... wake at 4.. or cycle at 8pm (when I am cuddling with my kids)... but don't act like you are doing it the right way. It's your way... not the right/wrong way.. it's just a way... not better not worse but dang! NOT BETTER!!

Let your kids eat Lucky Charms while they watch TV while you do your elliptical so your H still likes you ... IDK/IDC, but don't act like it is the "right way".

There's nothing in her post that said she is doing it the right way. Nothing. Nor that her kids eat Lucky Charms or that she is working out for her husband rather than herself.

She was opposing the sentiment that if you prioritize working out, even at 4 am, you must not "actually" love your kids the way a mom who lets herself go does, and that's nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying. This is called DC urban MOM. Probably 95% of us here have kids. You aren’t special. You do not prioritize working out or taking care of yourself and that’s why you’ve let yourself go. It’s not that you’re busy and we aren’t (everyone is busy) or that you love your kids and we don’t. You just don’t do it.

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

I dress nicely because I work hard and like to. I don’t slum around in yoga pants and baggy tees. It’s not hard to put a little makeup on and take care of your hair.

I don’t do this for anyone but me and that’s probably the main predictor of who will let themselves go and who won’t. I care about myself enough to want to be strong and healthy and capable. I like to look good for me. I’m not willing to compromise on that and then look in the mirror and hate myself.

Make time or don’t. Give a shit about yourself or don’t. That is all it comes down to.

Well you kids watch TV and getting up at 4am is psycho.

I go to bed around 8:30. Get up at 4, drink coffee, read websites, plan or grade for the day, then workout. Your idea of psycho is just kids watching 2 tv shows and basic ass normal self care and being on top of stuff.

Bed at 8:30... r u 5 years old... No sex typical DCUM... but I get my workout in.

I go to bed early... so I can wake up early..... and get shit done.

A SAHM who won’t leave her kids alone for 5 seconds so she can justify being overweight and skinny might not understand how that works. Also, I never said I was married so pretty weird of you to assume I’m in a sexless marriage because I bother to workout.

Oh here we go ... you are a SAHM hater. Okay... that makes sense. Okay super woman, show everybody how great you are. You give the rest of us WOHM a bad name.

Oh your not married... that is why you work out.

I’m not at all. But someone who won’t even let their kids watch tv and mocks a working mom for having to get up early to work out to fit it in is clearly out of touch with how most of us have to squeeze this stuff in. She chooses not to but she needs to quit slamming people who do by claiming they feed their kids Lucky Charms in front of the tv and ignore spouses (NOT ALL OF US ARE MARRIED BTW!) if we work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know anyone IRL who has a serious career and kids, and who hasn’t let themselves go to some extent, even if it’s just ten extra pounds they can’t seem to lose. There isn’t enough time for everything, something has to give.

+1

When I stayed at home I looked pretty good if I do say so myself. When I went back to work, I swore that I would keep up with my workouts, healthy eating, etc. I'm just way too busy and stressed to deal with it now.

Lol I don’t want to get involved in the mommy wars but when I see SAHMs I know with school aged kids running in my neighborhood during school hours it makes me mad haha. Like yeah I wish I could do that instead of heading in to work. I know I have a flexible job I should be thankful for instead of angry

[Anonymous]

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

It's great that you have prioritized taking care of yourself. But you aren't necessarily better than everyone else who might have a more challenging schedule than you do. And you sound really angry.

Where I live, a teacher's work day is 7.5 hours including a 30 minute lunch. That, plus the holidays, summers, and late openings, is a lot of time away from work. I know that teachers work hard and do tons of work at home, but work at home is done when you can, on your schedule. Teachers work short days. That extra hour you aren't at school every day gives you more time with your kids that many women don't have. Home by 5? Hmmm. Most full time workers have to be in the office a minimum of 8.5 hours per day, if not far more than that, and some of us get up super early just to handle our regular parenting and household responsibilities. Home by 6:30 is early.

Also, keep in mind that as your kids get older, you won't be able to go to bed at 8 or 9 because there will be activities. And you will spend tons of time in your car. You will spend your workout time driving. That's how some people get worn down and become exhausted and make bad decisions about eating. Not saying that we all shouldn't find ways to stay healthy, but it is not as simple as you make it sound, especially when you have a challenging job that requires long hours. Not an excuse, but PP, you don't sound like an nice person. A little more empathy might be in order.

I guess that's the good part about letting myself go. The skinny disciplined younger me would have judged the middle aged me harshly, but the middle aged me whose has dealt with quite a bit of adversity, special needs, toxic work situations, sick parents, and other challenges tries to see the good in people while trying to improve myself. We do the best we can under the circumstances presented and we have different challenges and different capabilities.

Oh, by the way, I don't even understand your story. You turned 30, at which time you had two kids (1 and 5) and started working out at home and later went back to work? So you were home with them for a long time and you had them when you were younger. It is much easier to get back into shape when you are home during the day and are younger when yo have them. Have a little compassion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying. This is called DC urban MOM. Probably 95% of us here have kids. You aren’t special. You do not prioritize working out or taking care of yourself and that’s why you’ve let yourself go. It’s not that you’re busy and we aren’t (everyone is busy) or that you love your kids and we don’t. You just don’t do it.

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

I dress nicely because I work hard and like to. I don’t slum around in yoga pants and baggy tees. It’s not hard to put a little makeup on and take care of your hair.

I don’t do this for anyone but me and that’s probably the main predictor of who will let themselves go and who won’t. I care about myself enough to want to be strong and healthy and capable. I like to look good for me. I’m not willing to compromise on that and then look in the mirror and hate myself.

Make time or don’t. Give a shit about yourself or don’t. That is all it comes down to.

Well you kids watch TV and getting up at 4am is psycho.

Dp. Who cares if kids watch tv while a parent works out? A 20 HIIT workout even 2 days a week, combined with some strength training and healthful eating does wonders. Waking up at 4 am is not psycho, if that is the only option. At some point, you have to make yourself a priority or you will physically decline beyond repair. Waking early to work out (or spend time for yourself) is absolutely worth it.

No... waking up at 4am is seriously unhealthy and will take it's toll in other ways. Just because your outer body looks good does not mean your mind is good.

I'm not plopping my kids in front of the TV so I can "work out" I will take them for a hike. Which may not give me a beach body but is better for overall health... and I spend time with the kdis.

In life priorities shift... parents get sick.. you gonna do pilates in the hospital room? Jeez, relax... you don't have to maintain such a crazy schedule to not "let yourself go" and really, letting yourself go a little is amuch healthier... body and soul.

NP but come on. You can hike with the kids AND work out - small bursts of TV time is not going to negatively impact your kids. I'd say my entire generation of 80s kids grew up with cartoons and we are all just fine, and my kids don't watch nearly enough tv as I used to after school and on Saturday mornings.

I used to be on the elliptical at 8 pm after I put my three little ones to bed. I'm not a morning person so no 4 am wakes for me, but I did it on the opposite end of my day. And yes, I still played outside with my kids and spent time with them. A hike with my kids simply wouldn't qualify as a workout for me.

You mean the generation that crashed the economy with bad mortgages, brought us Crack and gave us Trump?

Please do not hold the 80's up as anything to model. Diet coke and Marlboro lights was a diet.

It's fine if it is "not a workout for you" but nobody wants to be you.

Your post is defending a woman that posted "The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying"

Go for it... wake at 4.. or cycle at 8pm (when I am cuddling with my kids)... but don't act like you are doing it the right way. It's your way... not the right/wrong way.. it's just a way... not better not worse but dang! NOT BETTER!!

Let your kids eat Lucky Charms while they watch TV while you do your elliptical so your H still likes you ... IDK/IDC, but don't act like it is the "right way".

There's nothing in her post that said she is doing it the right way. Nothing. Nor that her kids eat Lucky Charms or that she is working out for her husband rather than herself.

She was opposing the sentiment that if you prioritize working out, even at 4 am, you must not "actually" love your kids the way a mom who lets herself go does, and that's nonsense.

Nobody said you don't love your kids if you work out. If I would rather spend time with my kids... I am just saying that... every time I have an opportunity to work out I think... I'd rather go home to my kids.

If I invite somebody to happy hour and they say... I'd rather go home to my kids... I don't think "oh... she thinks I don't love my kids" I think... NOT me gurl, I need a drink.

Stop taking what people say... I'd rather be with my kids ....and turn it into... "she just said I don't love my kids as much"... stop being insecure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who have the nerve to say “I let myself go because I actually love my kids and spend time with them” are so annoying. This is called DC urban MOM. Probably 95% of us here have kids. You aren’t special. You do not prioritize working out or taking care of yourself and that’s why you’ve let yourself go. It’s not that you’re busy and we aren’t (everyone is busy) or that you love your kids and we don’t. You just don’t do it.

Op, I have two kids. I work full time as a teacher. When I turned 30 I started doing Bikini Body Guide workouts in my living room while my kids, who were 5 and 1 at the time, watched tv. That’s how I know women who claim they can’t work out because of kids are full of shit. Yes you can. I did.

I eventually went back to work. I get up by 4 am every single day. I either work our in the morning from 5-6 or I do it when I get home from 5-6. It’s a habit now four years later. I go in my basement and work out.

I eat well 80% of the time. Again, anyone can do this. Some choose not to. They’re not better than anyone else because they eat like hell.

I dress nicely because I work hard and like to. I don’t slum around in yoga pants and baggy tees. It’s not hard to put a little makeup on and take care of your hair.

I don’t do this for anyone but me and that’s probably the main predictor of who will let themselves go and who won’t. I care about myself enough to want to be strong and healthy and capable. I like to look good for me. I’m not willing to compromise on that and then look in the mirror and hate myself.

Make time or don’t. Give a shit about yourself or don’t. That is all it comes down to.

Well you kids watch TV and getting up at 4am is psycho.

I go to bed around 8:30. Get up at 4, drink coffee, read websites, plan or grade for the day, then workout. Your idea of psycho is just kids watching 2 tv shows and basic ass normal self care and being on top of stuff.

Bed at 8:30... r u 5 years old... No sex typical DCUM... but I get my workout in.

I go to bed early... so I can wake up early..... and get shit done.

A SAHM who won’t leave her kids alone for 5 seconds so she can justify being overweight and skinny might not understand how that works. Also, I never said I was married so pretty weird of you to assume I’m in a sexless marriage because I bother to workout.

Oh here we go ... you are a SAHM hater. Okay... that makes sense. Okay super woman, show everybody how great you are. You give the rest of us WOHM a bad name.

Oh your not married... that is why you work out.

I’m not at all. But someone who won’t even let their kids watch tv and mocks a working mom for having to get up early to work out to fit it in is clearly out of touch with how most of us have to squeeze this stuff in. She chooses not to but she needs to quit slamming people who do by claiming they feed their kids Lucky Charms in front of the tv and ignore spouses (NOT ALL OF US ARE MARRIED BTW!) if we work out.

IRONY... don't mock somebody who is mocking somebody because they would rather be with their kids than doing a workout tape in their living room.

[Anonymous]

I love the podcast 'Weight loss for busy physicians'..by Katrina U aBell....it's not only for doctors..in fact will be very useful for a lot of the type a people on here....helped me a lot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love the podcast 'Weight loss for busy physicians'..by Katrina U aBell....it's not only for doctors..in fact will be very useful for a lot of the type a people on here....helped me a lot

Thank you. I'm going to look this up right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't go through menopause.

Don't have any stress in your life.

Be wealthy.

Don't have kids, or just let a nanny raise them so you can spend time taking care of your exterior.

[Anonymous]

well this certainly devolved

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't go through menopause.

Don't have any stress in your life.

Be wealthy.

+1

Never eat anything that tastes good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't see any posts from men about letting themselves go. And I never hear anyone use the phrase "let oneself go" in reference to a man, unless he's a last stage alcoholic.

Yes, because every society that's ever existed has always prized feminine beauty over masculine beauty. And personally, I enjoy being able to "look pretty" as a woman. Maybe the beauty and fashion board isn't the right place for you?

I expect my husband to work out, look after his skin and keep his body hair trimmed. I expect him to dress nicely. I look after myself and expect him to as well. He also likes to look good next to me and for me to be proud of how he looks.

[Anonymous]

So glad I left DC every single one of you is nuts