If you had an affair with a married person

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever feel bad for the spouse (and/or kids)? How did you reconcile entering someone else’s family like that.

Did you wish he/she would divorce or die so in your mind you could end up with them?

I’ve heard some really awful things from OW so just wondering anonymously what let you cross that line?

I got hit in a lot by married co-workers and others and my mind always went to their wife. I never wanted to do that to another woman, even ones I didn’t know. If things got heated, I’d distance and put up a wall. Things just don’t happen….

When I begin relationship with a married man, I don't enter someone else's family. I enter into a relationship with this one man. No, I don't wish that he get a divorce as I have no intent to get married.

OP, your post is written with a presumption that everyone has the line drawn at the same place. This is not true. Adultery is a sin in Christianity, but for many like me who were raised in an atheist country, it is not a big deal. Very soon family will not be sacred in the US too considering the overall movement, so I anticipate that the line will move too.

Oh boy I’m ready for the responses to this one…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people who commit adultery not have the ability to visualize in their mind or have an inner voice? I wonder if they have to do this because they can’t be content fantasizing themselves. That would be an interesting study what type of brains cheat

A lot of you want to live with your head in the sand. Almost everyone that I know that travels regularly for work is cheating on their spouse. It’s just too easy and most wives aren’t having regular sex with their husbands.

You know a lot of lying moral vacuums. Maybe find a better group of friends.

Also, when did you survey all wives everywhere? That must have been quite a feat of research. But it's the only way you could possibly state with such perfect confidence what "most wives" are or are not doing.

[Anonymous]

It's the man's fault. The married man should not proceed with temptation. There's drugs, cigarette, alcohol out there but I don't go after them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever feel bad for the spouse (and/or kids)? How did you reconcile entering someone else’s family like that.

Did you wish he/she would divorce or die so in your mind you could end up with them?

I’ve heard some really awful things from OW so just wondering anonymously what let you cross that line?

I got hit in a lot by married co-workers and others and my mind always went to their wife. I never wanted to do that to another woman, even ones I didn’t know. If things got heated, I’d distance and put up a wall. Things just don’t happen….

When I begin relationship with a married man, I don't enter someone else's family. I enter into a relationship with this one man. No, I don't wish that he get a divorce as I have no intent to get married.

OP, your post is written with a presumption that everyone has the line drawn at the same place. This is not true. Adultery is a sin in Christianity, but for many like me who were raised in an atheist country, it is not a big deal. Very soon family will not be sacred in the US too considering the overall movement, so I anticipate that the line will move too.

So zero empathy for the wife, got it. Just go around creating harm and hurt and taking zero part of responsibility for it. There is alternative you know: date single people.

Your cheating husband is the one who lacks empathy for you.

[Anonymous]

Your cheating husband is the one who lacks empathy for you.

Wow, you live in a very absolute world. Both cheaters lack empathy. It’s not a zero sum game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever feel bad for the spouse (and/or kids)? How did you reconcile entering someone else’s family like that.

Did you wish he/she would divorce or die so in your mind you could end up with them?

I’ve heard some really awful things from OW so just wondering anonymously what let you cross that line?
He’s the one that can’t keep his D in his pants…
I got hit in a lot by married co-workers and others and my mind always went to their wife. I never wanted to do that to another woman, even ones I didn’t know. If things got heated, I’d distance and put up a wall. Things just don’t happen….

When I begin relationship with a married man, I don't enter someone else's family. I enter into a relationship with this one man. No, I don't wish that he get a divorce as I have no intent to get married.

OP, your post is written with a presumption that everyone has the line drawn at the same place. This is not true. Adultery is a sin in Christianity, but for many like me who were raised in an atheist country, it is not a big deal. Very soon family will not be sacred in the US too considering the overall movement, so I anticipate that the line will move too.

You’d be mistaken. When the wife finds out and confronts you, you now are part of her life and you will be part of their life going forward. You are helping to create collateral damage.

Why can’t you find single men? Something is clearly wrong with you for continually seeking out relationships with married men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever feel bad for the spouse (and/or kids)? How did you reconcile entering someone else’s family like that.

Did you wish he/she would divorce or die so in your mind you could end up with them?

I’ve heard some really awful things from OW so just wondering anonymously what let you cross that line?

I got hit in a lot by married co-workers and others and my mind always went to their wife. I never wanted to do that to another woman, even ones I didn’t know. If things got heated, I’d distance and put up a wall. Things just don’t happen….

When I begin relationship with a married man, I don't enter someone else's family. I enter into a relationship with this one man. No, I don't wish that he get a divorce as I have no intent to get married.

OP, your post is written with a presumption that everyone has the line drawn at the same place. This is not true. Adultery is a sin in Christianity, but for many like me who were raised in an atheist country, it is not a big deal. Very soon family will not be sacred in the US too considering the overall movement, so I anticipate that the line will move too.

You’d be mistaken. When the wife finds out and confronts you, you now are part of her life and you will be part of their life going forward. You are helping to create collateral damage.

Why can’t you find single men? Something is clearly wrong with you for continually seeking out relationships with married men.

He can’t keep his D in his pants and his wife isn’t taking care of business at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Judge not let ye be judged.

Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone.

And I’m not even Christian.

Seriously all you righteous people preaching honesty need to look in the mirror, you think your sh!t don’t stink? As they say.

Maybe it’s what you did to get your DH, maybe it’s how you made your money, maybe it’s what you ignore to prosper, maybe it’s what you’re doing to get your kid ahead, but I guarantee you’ve done something in your life that others would take issue with.

What is with all the "don't judge!" posts on this and other threads today? If we adhered to "Judge not lest ye be judged" (and yeah, it's "lest," not "let") there would be no DCUM at all.

And coming here to compare affairs with the other supposed "sins" you list is tone-deaf. Others might take issue with some parent who lies on a form to get a kid into a school or whatever. That's vile cheating that deserves to be punished, sure. But it's not in the same league as screwing someone else's spouse.

It’s the “whore” judging. The “dickhead” judging. Etc. Let others live. If that’s what they want to do, so be it. If they’re not breaking any laws, again, so be it. What others do, is on them. Does it hurt you? I doubt it.

Wow, you're really stretching to make a point here, and it doesn't work. Of course it doens't "hurt" ME. But yes, I can judge because (1) it's an anonymous site where people come to ask opinions and you don't get to be the opinion police and (2) infidelity DOES hurt the cheated-on spouse and I can be as pi$**d off as I like on behalf of those whose spouses are cheating on them. Your "So be it" attitude is yours, which is fine. Not mine, and not that of others on this thread.

You made my day knowing I got to you. I’m smiling from ear to ear…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Your cheating husband is the one who lacks empathy for you.

Wow, you live in a very absolute world. Both cheaters lack empathy. It’s not a zero sum game.

The woman your husband is sleeping with isn't cheating on anyone and doesn't owe you anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Judge not let ye be judged.

Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone.

And I’m not even Christian.

Seriously all you righteous people preaching honesty need to look in the mirror, you think your sh!t don’t stink? As they say.

Maybe it’s what you did to get your DH, maybe it’s how you made your money, maybe it’s what you ignore to prosper, maybe it’s what you’re doing to get your kid ahead, but I guarantee you’ve done something in your life that others would take issue with.

What is with all the "don't judge!" posts on this and other threads today? If we adhered to "Judge not lest ye be judged" (and yeah, it's "lest," not "let") there would be no DCUM at all.

And coming here to compare affairs with the other supposed "sins" you list is tone-deaf. Others might take issue with some parent who lies on a form to get a kid into a school or whatever. That's vile cheating that deserves to be punished, sure. But it's not in the same league as screwing someone else's spouse.

It’s the “whore” judging. The “dickhead” judging. Etc. Let others live. If that’s what they want to do, so be it. If they’re not breaking any laws, again, so be it. What others do, is on them. Does it hurt you? I doubt it.

Wow, you're really stretching to make a point here, and it doesn't work. Of course it doens't "hurt" ME. But yes, I can judge because (1) it's an anonymous site where people come to ask opinions and you don't get to be the opinion police and (2) infidelity DOES hurt the cheated-on spouse and I can be as pi$**d off as I like on behalf of those whose spouses are cheating on them. Your "So be it" attitude is yours, which is fine. Not mine, and not that of others on this thread.

You made my day knowing I got to you. I’m smiling from ear to ear…

Oh, PP, you are SO easily amused. It's a fine quality in imbeciles and little children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever feel bad for the spouse (and/or kids)? How did you reconcile entering someone else’s family like that.

Did you wish he/she would divorce or die so in your mind you could end up with them?

I’ve heard some really awful things from OW so just wondering anonymously what let you cross that line?

I got hit in a lot by married co-workers and others and my mind always went to their wife. I never wanted to do that to another woman, even ones I didn’t know. If things got heated, I’d distance and put up a wall. Things just don’t happen….

When I begin relationship with a married man, I don't enter someone else's family. I enter into a relationship with this one man. No, I don't wish that he get a divorce as I have no intent to get married.

OP, your post is written with a presumption that everyone has the line drawn at the same place. This is not true. Adultery is a sin in Christianity, but for many like me who were raised in an atheist country, it is not a big deal. Very soon family will not be sacred in the US too considering the overall movement, so I anticipate that the line will move too.

You’d be mistaken. When the wife finds out and confronts you, you now are part of her life and you will be part of their life going forward. You are helping to create collateral damage.

Why can’t you find single men? Something is clearly wrong with you for continually seeking out relationships with married men.

He can’t keep his D in his pants and his wife isn’t taking care of business at home.

Oh yeah the “my wife isn’t having sex with me” BS. We had sex 3x a week 20-years in, everything under the sun. Most of these men are high drive and certainly getting it at home. But you wouldn’t want to bang him if he told you that truth, would you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Your cheating husband is the one who lacks empathy for you.

Wow, you live in a very absolute world. Both cheaters lack empathy. It’s not a zero sum game.

The woman your husband is sleeping with isn't cheating on anyone and doesn't owe you anything.

Ha! As if: Her husband. Most men in this area are banging other married people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people who commit adultery not have the ability to visualize in their mind or have an inner voice? I wonder if they have to do this because they can’t be content fantasizing themselves. That would be an interesting study what type of brains cheat

A lot of you want to live with your head in the sand. Almost everyone that I know that travels regularly for work is cheating on their spouse. It’s just too easy and most wives aren’t having regular sex with their husbands.

You know a lot of lying moral vacuums. Maybe find a better group of friends.

Also, when did you survey all wives everywhere? That must have been quite a feat of research. But it's the only way you could possibly state with such perfect confidence what "most wives" are or are not doing.

I work in a male dominated field, lots of guys that probably didn’t get any in college. These days they are highly paid and usually with a wife that stays at home. They are finally getting attention from women and are taking full advantage of it. Easiest place to get laid is the hotel lobby bar, so if your husband is traveling, be worried.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lowly people get off on the idea they are someone that can “steal” a man or woman’s spouse. Very low self-esteem and a twisted mind. They get off on it.

Low Value People walk around thinking that they actually "own" their spouse. Newsflash: you don't own any other person. It's not stealing because you didn't have ownership in the first place. You want to get mad at someone? Get mad at your cheating husband who was open to sex with another.

fully agree, and CTC about those idiotic vows, have you ever heard in the church ‘I’ll be faithful to her/him even if s/he is not intimate with me for years’, let me know when they add that in there, I guess it must be part of the ‘and in sickness’

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous
100% of your anger should be directed at your cheating spouse. They are the one who took vows with you, lied to you, spent time with someone else. A third party cannot come into a strong, healthy marriage and break it up.

This is wrong in so many levels. The implication that people in strong marriages don’t cheat is false - many people cheat because they can, even though they love their spouse and want to stay married. More importantly, I could be 100% angry at my spouse AND the other person, who jacks character and morals. They didn’t take vows with me, but their is a human code that moral people observe.

no, no one that really loves and respects their spouse will ever cheat, not even if that is something that they know they will be forgiven for, you love your spouse then that is what you think about, how to make them happy, how to share with them everything you have and go through
people that cheat do not love the other one but they may still want to stay together for various reasons, and they will never admit it