Jealous of Big Law partner spouses?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Corporate cog here. Every middling middle manager is routinely missing dinner with the kids. Anyone making over $250K is also routinely logging in after dinner.

I guess Big Law is easy street, who knew.

Yea, I agree - laughably ridiculous claim. Even SAH moms miss dinner with the kids more than once every six months!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Wow, well, I'm that poster. And what I said was he missed dinner once in the last six months, not that he never ever misses dinner. I actually hadn't even realized he'd gone so long without missing dinner except that the night he was gone (recently, due to a work event), the kids acted like it was such a big deal, and that made me go back and look and realize that it had been at least six months since he'd missed dinner. He DID miss dinner and bedtime much more frequently as an associate. He also used to travel much more before covid. But we both agreed that he wouldn't continue in private practice if it was as crazy as some people claim (and again - I know it is crazy for some lawyers in some firms), and so far, for him, it hasn't been.

He IS a partner in one of the very DC-focused practice areas mentioned earlier, at a firm known for being family friendly. Perhaps in the NY market he would work longer hours (and make 8M instead of 2M) but in DC life is pretty good. Partners in his firm, at least that he works with, often have evening time blocked off (slightly different times, depending on the age of the kids!) in which they won't schedule calls. And with rare exceptions those blocked off hours are respected.

You can claim I'm full of shit all you want, it doesn't change what's true about my life and family.

[Anonymous]

^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

Geostationary.

Clearly there is something wrong with your memory if you only remember once. No one believes this is true. I do believe that your cognition might be faulty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Wow, well, I'm that poster. And what I said was he missed dinner once in the last six months, not that he never ever misses dinner. I actually hadn't even realized he'd gone so long without missing dinner except that the night he was gone (recently, due to a work event), the kids acted like it was such a big deal, and that made me go back and look and realize that it had been at least six months since he'd missed dinner. He DID miss dinner and bedtime much more frequently as an associate. He also used to travel much more before covid. But we both agreed that he wouldn't continue in private practice if it was as crazy as some people claim (and again - I know it is crazy for some lawyers in some firms), and so far, for him, it hasn't been.

He IS a partner in one of the very DC-focused practice areas mentioned earlier, at a firm known for being family friendly. Perhaps in the NY market he would work longer hours (and make 8M instead of 2M) but in DC life is pretty good. Partners in his firm, at least that he works with, often have evening time blocked off (slightly different times, depending on the age of the kids!) in which they won't schedule calls. And with rare exceptions those blocked off hours are respected.

You can claim I'm full of shit all you want, it doesn't change what's true about my life and family.

It isn’t true. It just isn’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

Geostationary.

Clearly there is something wrong with your memory if you only remember once. No one believes this is true. I do believe that your cognition might be faulty.

Well, I believe it to be true. I had a law school professor who was always home for dinner. She said it was just really, really important to her to be home for dinner every day so she did it even when she was a junior partner at a big law firm (in case anybody is curious I think it was Kirkland in litigation). Her husband wasn't an attorney but had a really demanding job as well and he was there for dinners too. Of course they stayed up late to get things done. It's just about what you prioritize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

Geostationary.

Clearly there is something wrong with your memory if you only remember once. No one believes this is true. I do believe that your cognition might be faulty.

Well, I believe it to be true. I had a law school professor who was always home for dinner. She said it was just really, really important to her to be home for dinner every day so she did it even when she was a junior partner at a big law firm (in case anybody is curious I think it was Kirkland in litigation). Her husband wasn't an attorney but had a really demanding job as well and he was there for dinners too. Of course they stayed up late to get things done. It's just about what you prioritize.

I didn't mean junior partner, I meant junior associate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

And here come the caveats!

[Anonymous]

Can I ask why this board is so fascinated with big law partners? Don't like Wall Street spouses or tech or venture capital spouses make more? Or is it because big law is more common than the others in DC?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Wow, well, I'm that poster. And what I said was he missed dinner once in the last six months, not that he never ever misses dinner. I actually hadn't even realized he'd gone so long without missing dinner except that the night he was gone (recently, due to a work event), the kids acted like it was such a big deal, and that made me go back and look and realize that it had been at least six months since he'd missed dinner. He DID miss dinner and bedtime much more frequently as an associate. He also used to travel much more before covid. But we both agreed that he wouldn't continue in private practice if it was as crazy as some people claim (and again - I know it is crazy for some lawyers in some firms), and so far, for him, it hasn't been.

He IS a partner in one of the very DC-focused practice areas mentioned earlier, at a firm known for being family friendly. Perhaps in the NY market he would work longer hours (and make 8M instead of 2M) but in DC life is pretty good. Partners in his firm, at least that he works with, often have evening time blocked off (slightly different times, depending on the age of the kids!) in which they won't schedule calls. And with rare exceptions those blocked off hours are respected.

You can claim I'm full of shit all you want, it doesn't change what's true about my life and family.

It isn’t true. It just isn’t.

Yep. Plus if he's home every night and weekend, someone else is developing that work for him, and thereby getting all of the origination credit. And its nearly impossible to make $2M on hours you personally billed yourself (unless you bill a $hit ton of them) without also getting the origination credit. So the math is just not adding up. Including her assertion that all her husband's partners have the same sweatheart deal. They sound like service partners. And service partners don't make $2M.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ And I'll add, WE miss dinner with the kids when we go out on a date or have another social obligation, but HE has missed dinner for work only once in the last six months.

Geostationary.

Clearly there is something wrong with your memory if you only remember once. No one believes this is true. I do believe that your cognition might be faulty.

Well, I believe it to be true. I had a law school professor who was always home for dinner. She said it was just really, really important to her to be home for dinner every day so she did it even when she was a junior partner at a big law firm (in case anybody is curious I think it was Kirkland in litigation). Her husband wasn't an attorney but had a really demanding job as well and he was there for dinners too. Of course they stayed up late to get things done. It's just about what you prioritize.

HAHAHAHAHA she was a junior partner in litigation at Kirkland, never had to travel, and never missed a dinner at home. HAHAHAHAHA this is getting better and better.

[Anonymous]

being home for dinner every night and making 2 million would only add up if they were a rainmaker who had origination credit and didn't do the work

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Wow, well, I'm that poster. And what I said was he missed dinner once in the last six months, not that he never ever misses dinner. I actually hadn't even realized he'd gone so long without missing dinner except that the night he was gone (recently, due to a work event), the kids acted like it was such a big deal, and that made me go back and look and realize that it had been at least six months since he'd missed dinner. He DID miss dinner and bedtime much more frequently as an associate. He also used to travel much more before covid. But we both agreed that he wouldn't continue in private practice if it was as crazy as some people claim (and again - I know it is crazy for some lawyers in some firms), and so far, for him, it hasn't been.

He IS a partner in one of the very DC-focused practice areas mentioned earlier, at a firm known for being family friendly. Perhaps in the NY market he would work longer hours (and make 8M instead of 2M) but in DC life is pretty good. Partners in his firm, at least that he works with, often have evening time blocked off (slightly different times, depending on the age of the kids!) in which they won't schedule calls. And with rare exceptions those blocked off hours are respected.

You can claim I'm full of shit all you want, it doesn't change what's true about my life and family.

It isn’t true. It just isn’t.

I think what I wonder is, what do you have to gain by insisting this stupid random detail of my life is not true? Seriously, what? Is it so important to you that every family with a high HHI is miserable? Or just every attorney? I used it as an EXAMPLE of how some families have achieved balance with one parent working as a biglaw partner, and you (or multiple people?) feel so confident I'm lying - and for what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why this board is so fascinated with big law partners? Don't like Wall Street spouses or tech or venture capital spouses make more? Or is it because big law is more common than the others in DC?

You again? You already asked this question. You left out the part when you say “I’m from San Francisco.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The “only missed dinner once in six months”
poster is so full of shit I can smell it from here. I can’t think of any parent in any job, whether a big law partner or a garbage collector, who never, ever, ever, EVER has to miss dinner with the kids.

Wow, well, I'm that poster. And what I said was he missed dinner once in the last six months, not that he never ever misses dinner. I actually hadn't even realized he'd gone so long without missing dinner except that the night he was gone (recently, due to a work event), the kids acted like it was such a big deal, and that made me go back and look and realize that it had been at least six months since he'd missed dinner. He DID miss dinner and bedtime much more frequently as an associate. He also used to travel much more before covid. But we both agreed that he wouldn't continue in private practice if it was as crazy as some people claim (and again - I know it is crazy for some lawyers in some firms), and so far, for him, it hasn't been.

He IS a partner in one of the very DC-focused practice areas mentioned earlier, at a firm known for being family friendly. Perhaps in the NY market he would work longer hours (and make 8M instead of 2M) but in DC life is pretty good. Partners in his firm, at least that he works with, often have evening time blocked off (slightly different times, depending on the age of the kids!) in which they won't schedule calls. And with rare exceptions those blocked off hours are respected.

You can claim I'm full of shit all you want, it doesn't change what's true about my life and family.

It isn’t true. It just isn’t.

I think what I wonder is, what do you have to gain by insisting this stupid random detail of my life is not true? Seriously, what? Is it so important to you that every family with a high HHI is miserable? Or just every attorney? I used it as an EXAMPLE of how some families have achieved balance with one parent working as a biglaw partner, and you (or multiple people?) feel so confident I'm lying - and for what?

See, it doesn’t ring true to me because I WAS a Biglaw partner in DC, I DID work surprisingly reasonable hours, and I never knew a single lawyer of any age, title, gender, position, or practice group who never, ever, ever missed dinner with the family. I’ve never met a single human being who hasn’t, in fact. You may not be lying, but you sure as hell are mistaken.