Does anyone else find ‘cherish these moments’ parenting advice a little traumatizing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is like you are hiking on a trail. The people who are coming back might say, "that next part is a bear." Or, "didn't the part you just finished have spectacular views?" They are not being smug or competitive or mean. They are sharing the journey you are both on.

If you were not so exhausted and overwhelmed, you could probably take it as it is meant. I just don't think you realize that your strong negative reaction emanates from your quality of life right now, not the friendly women who is looking fondly at your beautiful child.

Totally agree. There is their weird generation that never wants to interact with anyone, won’t answer their front door, and only sees the world through their own eyes. It is a strange and sad lot.

This. And they literally don't have the time of day for someone 10-15 years ahead of them on this path, and actually wonder why we have the audacity to even breathe the same air they do. Hope all these angry moms don't have more kids, but because more kids are actually MORE work, despite what cute Instagram image they have in their head.

It doesn’t matter that you’re ahead of us on “the path,” because that’s YOUR path. I’m on my path. If you want to connect with me and walk with me, smile and try to start a *polite* conversation. Smug Older Mommy ain’t it.

Some of my closest neighbors and friends are 10-15 years older than I am. I cherish their place in my life. We chat about what we are all going through at all the various life phases of kids and aging parents and its invaluable to me. I'm really sorry you don't have that.

I do have that. But those friendships and interactions did not start with strangers walking up to me and Smug Mommying me. They started with kind, positive, organic conversation that wasn’t full of Just You Waits and You Think It’s Tough Now’s.

It’s sad you don’t get that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is like you are hiking on a trail. The people who are coming back might say, "that next part is a bear." Or, "didn't the part you just finished have spectacular views?" They are not being smug or competitive or mean. They are sharing the journey you are both on.

If you were not so exhausted and overwhelmed, you could probably take it as it is meant. I just don't think you realize that your strong negative reaction emanates from your quality of life right now, not the friendly women who is looking fondly at your beautiful child.

Totally agree. There is their weird generation that never wants to interact with anyone, won’t answer their front door, and only sees the world through their own eyes. It is a strange and sad lot.

This. And they literally don't have the time of day for someone 10-15 years ahead of them on this path, and actually wonder why we have the audacity to even breathe the same air they do. Hope all these angry moms don't have more kids, but because more kids are actually MORE work, despite what cute Instagram image they have in their head.

It is actually shocking how women on this site, who share the same difficult job of parenting are ripping each other apart (one side only mind you) instead of supporting each other.

Talk about smug. How many of the younger posters seem to think they are superior because their moms gave birth to them after the older posters' moms. That takes not talent and guess what, you will reach our age. And hopefully the younger women you encounter will have respect for you and realize that you have a tremendous amount in common despite the wrinkles on your face.

They are the same ones complaining they have no family or support network and they wonder whatever happened to "it takes a village"? The village is still there, but apparently we are beneath them.

I have a village full of friends, family, co-workers and neighbors. My village is supportive, considerate, positive and polite. It is not full of Smug Mommys who try to one-up people and make everything about them.

Older moms are not beneath me. Smug Mommys are, indeed, beneath me. Seek attention elsewhere. I focus on positive people who approach with a smile and a kind word, not unsolicited advice and Just You Waits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't find it traumatizing, maybe annoying. But my oldest has now moved away to college, and I miss those days. Looking back, those years did go by really fast. Like they say, "The days are long, but the years are short." (Sorry, I know that's another cliche).

My kid also left for college this year and what I can to realize is that you look back and realize you do cherish lmoments.
You remember all those everyday things. Those were the moments 😊
a favorite toy your child loved as a baby
singing a silly song over and over as a toddler
a game they loved
you will stumble on a shirt they wore long past fitting bc it was their favorite
a trip you took
the time you hung out at the pool
the time you went in that long road trip

You will think about it and realize that there are so many moments you cherished and the memory of them you continue to cherish
We all think we could have done more and wish we had but that doesn’t mean there aren’t a hundred little moments that were special
The thing about the little

[Anonymous]

I have a crawling 9 month old that refuses to sleep and be still and a preschooler who is having a hard time with being at school for first time. I will not miss one moment of this. Everyday I’m happy has passed with everyone alive and well and fed so I can get closer to being older and alone with my husband in silence in cleanliness in slowness in savoring the little things. I don’t cherish sh$$ right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is like you are hiking on a trail. The people who are coming back might say, "that next part is a bear." Or, "didn't the part you just finished have spectacular views?" They are not being smug or competitive or mean. They are sharing the journey you are both on.

If you were not so exhausted and overwhelmed, you could probably take it as it is meant. I just don't think you realize that your strong negative reaction emanates from your quality of life right now, not the friendly women who is looking fondly at your beautiful child.

Totally agree. There is their weird generation that never wants to interact with anyone, won’t answer their front door, and only sees the world through their own eyes. It is a strange and sad lot.

This. And they literally don't have the time of day for someone 10-15 years ahead of them on this path, and actually wonder why we have the audacity to even breathe the same air they do. Hope all these angry moms don't have more kids, but because more kids are actually MORE work, despite what cute Instagram image they have in their head.

It is actually shocking how women on this site, who share the same difficult job of parenting are ripping each other apart (one side only mind you) instead of supporting each other.

Talk about smug. How many of the younger posters seem to think they are superior because their moms gave birth to them after the older posters' moms. That takes not talent and guess what, you will reach our age. And hopefully the younger women you encounter will have respect for you and realize that you have a tremendous amount in common despite the wrinkles on your face.

They are the same ones complaining they have no family or support network and they wonder whatever happened to "it takes a village"? The village is still there, but apparently we are beneath them.

I have a village full of friends, family, co-workers and neighbors. My village is supportive, considerate, positive and polite. It is not full of Smug Mommys who try to one-up people and make everything about them.

Older moms are not beneath me. Smug Mommys are, indeed, beneath me. Seek attention elsewhere. I focus on positive people who approach with a smile and a kind word, not unsolicited advice and Just You Waits.

Your repeated comments and arguments and name-calling here make the bolded statements impossible to believe. Our generation is terrified of offending yours, and with good reason. You seem okay with that though.

[Anonymous]

Smug Mommy isn't a thing, stop trying to make it happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is like you are hiking on a trail. The people who are coming back might say, "that next part is a bear." Or, "didn't the part you just finished have spectacular views?" They are not being smug or competitive or mean. They are sharing the journey you are both on.

If you were not so exhausted and overwhelmed, you could probably take it as it is meant. I just don't think you realize that your strong negative reaction emanates from your quality of life right now, not the friendly women who is looking fondly at your beautiful child.

Totally agree. There is their weird generation that never wants to interact with anyone, won’t answer their front door, and only sees the world through their own eyes. It is a strange and sad lot.

This. And they literally don't have the time of day for someone 10-15 years ahead of them on this path, and actually wonder why we have the audacity to even breathe the same air they do. Hope all these angry moms don't have more kids, but because more kids are actually MORE work, despite what cute Instagram image they have in their head.

It is actually shocking how women on this site, who share the same difficult job of parenting are ripping each other apart (one side only mind you) instead of supporting each other.

Talk about smug. How many of the younger posters seem to think they are superior because their moms gave birth to them after the older posters' moms. That takes not talent and guess what, you will reach our age. And hopefully the younger women you encounter will have respect for you and realize that you have a tremendous amount in common despite the wrinkles on your face.

They are the same ones complaining they have no family or support network and they wonder whatever happened to "it takes a village"? The village is still there, but apparently we are beneath them.

I have a village full of friends, family, co-workers and neighbors. My village is supportive, considerate, positive and polite. It is not full of Smug Mommys who try to one-up people and make everything about them.

Older moms are not beneath me. Smug Mommys are, indeed, beneath me. Seek attention elsewhere. I focus on positive people who approach with a smile and a kind word, not unsolicited advice and Just You Waits.

Your repeated comments and arguments and name-calling here make the bolded statements impossible to believe. Our generation is terrified of offending yours, and with good reason. You seem okay with that though.

LOL, OK. Bye!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a crawling 9 month old that refuses to sleep and be still and a preschooler who is having a hard time with being at school for first time. I will not miss one moment of this. Everyday I’m happy has passed with everyone alive and well and fed so I can get closer to being older and alone with my husband in silence in cleanliness in slowness in savoring the little things. I don’t cherish sh$$ right now.

But you will. Unless you are a robot, you will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Smug Mommy isn't a thing, stop trying to make it happen.

Smug Mommy is…literally why this thread exists. I get that you’re unsettled by knowing what people really think and say about you after you drop your unsolicited advice and smug comments and exit stage left.

[Anonymous]

No, those type of generic catchphrases don't bother me at all. I think people say stuff like this when they don't have anything genuine to say. Kind of like when someone says "how are you?" and you respond "fine". It's just a generic and easy statement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think it’s saying you’re doing anything wrong. I just think it’s true that we often wish things away then look back and miss it.

Agree. I know I've said it at some point, but only because I miss my little boys. I love who they are now, but it was fleeting. Oops I did it again....

[Anonymous]

^^ What I meant to say is it's me, not you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^ What I meant to say is it's me, not you.

Then don’t put it on me, or make it about me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Smug Mommy isn't a thing, stop trying to make it happen.

Smug Mommy is…literally why this thread exists. I get that you’re unsettled by knowing what people really think and say about you after you drop your unsolicited advice and smug comments and exit stage left.

I thought you said you were leaving? And yet here you are still protesting. We are not speaking to you smugly, we promise. Your insecurity just makes it feel that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ What I meant to say is it's me, not you.

Then don’t put it on me, or make it about me.

DP. Not everything is about you! My god. If the younger moms are trying to make Smug Mommy a thing, can we make Navel-Gazing Snowflake Mom a thing, too?