When sorority rush goes wrong

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These replies are so mean lol.

OP's DD is 18. Do you think you weren't into vapid things when you were 18? She's a year out from high school, ffs, and I think we all remember how competitive and shallow high school was.

I recall precisely one person whose mother was emotionally involved in how rush turned out. We all felt sorry for her.

Okay?

How would OP's kid's friend's know about this post? There's a difference between calling your kid every night to vent to her about how worried you are about her rush experience and seeking ideas for how to best support her on your town's anonymous mommy forum.

Some of you are so strange.

The person who thinks it’s normal for a parent to be this emotionally involved in strange.

She asked for help supporting her child. That is not "emotionally involved." Hope this helps!

[Anonymous]

OP, I don't have any magic elixir, but I am sending hugs. The social aspects of any new school can be tough.

[Anonymous]

The top tier means they have a better online presence. They have members with 20k followers and it helps the house get collabs. They present a rich, privileged, pretty existence. It’s easy to covet if you are an 18 yo girl. It’s the reason influencers are influencers.

The lower tier houses either aren't as good or as concerned with the curated image. They still have plenty of smart, funny, beautiful girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These replies are so mean lol.

OP's DD is 18. Do you think you weren't into vapid things when you were 18? She's a year out from high school, ffs, and I think we all remember how competitive and shallow high school was.

I recall precisely one person whose mother was emotionally involved in how rush turned out. We all felt sorry for her.

Okay?

How would OP's kid's friend's know about this post? There's a difference between calling your kid every night to vent to her about how worried you are about her rush experience and seeking ideas for how to best support her on your town's anonymous mommy forum.

Some of you are so strange.

The person who thinks it’s normal for a parent to be this emotionally involved in strange.

She asked for help supporting her child. That is not "emotionally involved." Hope this helps!

I guess you skipped through the paragraphs and paragraphs of detail on the rush situation. You don’t need that to help support the child. OP tells this because she’s emotionally involved. Sounds like you might get too emotionally involved too so that won’t help you! Your child will be okay. All you have to say is - that sounds hard but I know you will come out the other side stronger and with friends. Really, all of OP’s detail shows she’s pretty wrapped into it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The top tier means they have a better online presence. They have members with 20k followers and it helps the house get collabs. They present a rich, privileged, pretty existence. It’s easy to covet if you are an 18 yo girl. It’s the reason influencers are influencers.

The lower tier houses either aren't as good or as concerned with the curated image. They still have plenty of smart, funny, beautiful girls.

This. I just read a horrific story in a magazine about the top sorority at SMU. They hazed (the author made clear that other sororities do NOT do this, it's just the sorority had gotten so mean and toxic they started) so they were kicked off campus. They essentially started a secret society and the girls were all really hot tiktok influencers who were taking ozempic and getting botox and lip filler at 18/19 years old. Crazy shit. I'd rather be in a lower tier sorority than dealing with all that.

I think your DD should stick it out and see what house she gets before she quits rush. Honestly, I think if she gets one bid and it's the shittiest house, she should still take it and try it. She may have more in common with those girls than she thinks. Also she's still so young. In four years she will be an adult who cares about her friends and the memories she's made with them. Not the fact that they weren't the "hottest" girls on campus.

[Anonymous]

NP- For those who understand this crazy process: until what point (after what round) can a girl drop out of rush, and then still be eligible for COB?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The top tier means they have a better online presence. They have members with 20k followers and it helps the house get collabs. They present a rich, privileged, pretty existence. It’s easy to covet if you are an 18 yo girl. It’s the reason influencers are influencers.

The lower tier houses either aren't as good or as concerned with the curated image. They still have plenty of smart, funny, beautiful girls.

What does this mean?

[Anonymous]

I read Greekchat when I rushed. These broads are crazy but they do have helpful advice for not getting your first choice in rush:

https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=121412

https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=129836

https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=106678

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The top tier means they have a better online presence. They have members with 20k followers and it helps the house get collabs. They present a rich, privileged, pretty existence. It’s easy to covet if you are an 18 yo girl. It’s the reason influencers are influencers.

The lower tier houses either aren't as good or as concerned with the curated image. They still have plenty of smart, funny, beautiful girls.

This. I just read a horrific story in a magazine about the top sorority at SMU. They hazed (the author made clear that other sororities do NOT do this, it's just the sorority had gotten so mean and toxic they started) so they were kicked off campus. They essentially started a secret society and the girls were all really hot tiktok influencers who were taking ozempic and getting botox and lip filler at 18/19 years old. Crazy shit. I'd rather be in a lower tier sorority than dealing with all that.

I think your DD should stick it out and see what house she gets before she quits rush. Honestly, I think if she gets one bid and it's the shittiest house, she should still take it and try it. She may have more in common with those girls than she thinks. Also she's still so young. In four years she will be an adult who cares about her friends and the memories she's made with them. Not the fact that they weren't the "hottest" girls on campus.

Statements like “you should take any bid and try it” reveal how little you know about this process. For one thing, dues and initiation fees can amount to thousands of dollars a year or even semester. This is not some little club you’re joining. It’s a commitment of time and money. If you don’t like the house that you get a bid from, why should you get that involved?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This seems like an odd thing for a parent to be involved in. You know she’s an adult right?

There is emotional connection that is not severed by the age of 18. It would seem like you have little of that with your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP- For those who understand this crazy process: until what point (after what round) can a girl drop out of rush, and then still be eligible for COB?

I believe it’s until they sign the binding agree the night of Pref. They can go to the party or parties and still drop. Once they sign the agreement to accept whatever bid is issued, they are no longer eligible unless they somehow don’t get a bid the next morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like an odd thing for a parent to be involved in. You know she’s an adult right?

There is emotional connection that is not severed by the age of 18. It would seem like you have little of that with your kid.

You can have an emotional connection with your children and still let them to take the lead on decisions and sorting through their emotions. Clearly a foreign concept to many on this post, including you. So many of you are confusing your own anxiety for love and connection.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The top tier means they have a better online presence. They have members with 20k followers and it helps the house get collabs. They present a rich, privileged, pretty existence. It’s easy to covet if you are an 18 yo girl. It’s the reason influencers are influencers.

The lower tier houses either aren't as good or as concerned with the curated image. They still have plenty of smart, funny, beautiful girls.

This. I just read a horrific story in a magazine about the top sorority at SMU. They hazed (the author made clear that other sororities do NOT do this, it's just the sorority had gotten so mean and toxic they started) so they were kicked off campus. They essentially started a secret society and the girls were all really hot tiktok influencers who were taking ozempic and getting botox and lip filler at 18/19 years old. Crazy shit. I'd rather be in a lower tier sorority than dealing with all that.

I think your DD should stick it out and see what house she gets before she quits rush. Honestly, I think if she gets one bid and it's the shittiest house, she should still take it and try it. She may have more in common with those girls than she thinks. Also she's still so young. In four years she will be an adult who cares about her friends and the memories she's made with them. Not the fact that they weren't the "hottest" girls on campus.

I’m hesitant to hear the answer but I’ll ask anyway. What type of hazing did they do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like an odd thing for a parent to be involved in. You know she’s an adult right?

There is emotional connection that is not severed by the age of 18. It would seem like you have little of that with your kid.

You can have an emotional connection with your children and still let them to take the lead on decisions and sorting through their emotions. Clearly a foreign concept to many on this post, including you. So many of you are confusing your own anxiety for love and connection.

You are certainly clueless. Why hover on this board?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like an odd thing for a parent to be involved in. You know she’s an adult right?

There is emotional connection that is not severed by the age of 18. It would seem like you have little of that with your kid.

You can have an emotional connection with your children and still let them to take the lead on decisions and sorting through their emotions. Clearly a foreign concept to many on this post, including you. So many of you are confusing your own anxiety for love and connection.

You are certainly clueless. Why hover on this board?

So you ran out of actual comments and are just in the insult stage? Well good luck with all your enmeshment.