Coy About College Decision

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here -- you are rather mean.

These are personal friends, and yes, so many of us have shared our info with them. Never said we were entitled to the info. But do find it odd that if they felt uncomfortable about the next step, why post pic after pic on social media from DC's graduation and stating how proud they were of DC, etc., wanting us all to cheer DC on?

Wouldn't it seem obvious that people would want to know next steps?

To be clear, it was not me that asked about where the DC is going to college. It was other parents who congratulated the kid on social media (over 300 people have congratulated the kid on social media based on the graduation pics the parents posted). But I think that there is nothing wrong with asking. Just surprised that the family is being coy after being so in our face about the graduation.

Had they been silent about it all, then I would feel like questions about college might be intrusive.

No, you're a busybody.

People share what they want to share. If they choose not to, for whatever reason, that's their business. And while I would agree that there's nothing wrong with innocently asking the parents about their kid's next step, to come on this board and speculate about why they are withholding that information is, well, weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is obvious to me that if someone doesn't share what Larlo's future plans are, they have a good reason.

And it wasn't my place to pry.

Social media sucks.

Yes, this should be obvious to anyone with EQ > 0.

And it’s really their DC’s place to share. Not the parent.

The parents are far from being shy about sharing everything else -- every award and accolade, every trip, every milestone. Just thought it odd since they share so much so often.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is obvious to me that if someone doesn't share what Larlo's future plans are, they have a good reason.

And it wasn't my place to pry.

Social media sucks.

Yes, this should be obvious to anyone with EQ > 0.

And it’s really their DC’s place to share. Not the parent.

The parents are far from being shy about sharing everything else -- every award and accolade, every trip, every milestone. Just thought it odd since they share so much so often.

That. Doesn't. Matter. If they are actually your friends, and you care about them, let it go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here -- you are rather mean.

These are personal friends, and yes, so many of us have shared our info with them. Never said we were entitled to the info. But do find it odd that if they felt uncomfortable about the next step, why post pic after pic on social media from DC's graduation and stating how proud they were of DC, etc., wanting us all to cheer DC on?

Wouldn't it seem obvious that people would want to know next steps?

To be clear, it was not me that asked about where the DC is going to college. It was other parents who congratulated the kid on social media (over 300 people have congratulated the kid on social media based on the graduation pics the parents posted). But I think that there is nothing wrong with asking. Just surprised that the family is being coy after being so in our face about the graduation.

Had they been silent about it all, then I would feel like questions about college might be intrusive.

No, you're a busybody.

People share what they want to share. If they choose not to, for whatever reason, that's their business. And while I would agree that there's nothing wrong with innocently asking the parents about their kid's next step, to come on this board and speculate about why they are withholding that information is, well, weird.

Then jump off and go an troll someone else.

I had a legit question that I felt the need to ask, and I appreciate the thoughtful responses from those who have made me view this from other angles. There is no harm in asking.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she's pregnant and is taking a gap year. Maybe she's taking a gap year anyway. In any case, none of your business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here -- you are rather mean.

These are personal friends, and yes, so many of us have shared our info with them. Never said we were entitled to the info. But do find it odd that if they felt uncomfortable about the next step, why post pic after pic on social media from DC's graduation and stating how proud they were of DC, etc., wanting us all to cheer DC on?

Wouldn't it seem obvious that people would want to know next steps?

To be clear, it was not me that asked about where the DC is going to college. It was other parents who congratulated the kid on social media (over 300 people have congratulated the kid on social media based on the graduation pics the parents posted). But I think that there is nothing wrong with asking. Just surprised that the family is being coy after being so in our face about the graduation.

Had they been silent about it all, then I would feel like questions about college might be intrusive.

You're obviously a very competitive person and in a very competitive social group, Of all the high school graduation pics I've seen on social media over the last few weeks from friends, family, former colleagues and acquaintances, I've only seen one who gave any clue about where the kid was going to college. I've also never seen any comments from anyone other than "congratulations!" No one's asking "ok, so what are the college plans?"

Again, I did not ask about the college choice. Other parents did. I just wondered why they were being so coy about releasing the info, but I never asked about the college choice!

[Anonymous]

A friend of mine followed this same pattern with her DD a few years ago. Turned out DD was on waitlist for UVA but didn't end up getting in. So she took a gap year, reapplied & got in the following year. My friend didn't say anything about DD's plans for a while after graduation bc they were still uncertain.

Don't worry, you'll learn soon enough.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t share it with you. I’m not answering that question. Because people -even “friends”- can be judgey. You expected my kid to go to a top school but he decided he didn’t like that atmosphere and went with a school that was not only what he wanted, but he got a free ride. I’m not going to explain all this to you on FB so you’ll just wonder “what happened?” if I share the school....like you’re doing with this post. Your post here makes me think I made the right decision.

[Anonymous]

OP sounds really messed up. The fact that you are repeatedly labeling as “coy” the fact that they haven’t mentioned a college choice on social media is bizarre enough. The fact that you would refer to a posting as a “release” of information is beyond bizarre. And the fact that you don’t see that this language makes you appear to be both judgmental and a nosy busybody. . . is just sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is obvious to me that if someone doesn't share what Larlo's future plans are, they have a good reason.

And it wasn't my place to pry.

Social media sucks.

Yes, this should be obvious to anyone with EQ > 0.

And it’s really their DC’s place to share. Not the parent.

The parents are far from being shy about sharing everything else -- every award and accolade, every trip, every milestone. Just thought it odd since they share so much so often.

EQ < 0

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are not entitled to information about someone else's life.

Spend your time worrying about other things.

x 1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is obvious to me that if someone doesn't share what Larlo's future plans are, they have a good reason.

And it wasn't my place to pry.

Social media sucks.

Yes, this should be obvious to anyone with EQ > 0.

And it’s really their DC’s place to share. Not the parent.

The parents are far from being shy about sharing everything else -- every award and accolade, every trip, every milestone. Just thought it odd since they share so much so often.

EQ < 0

yep, they shared it all and then DC turns 18 and it is no longer their info to share.

[Anonymous]

You people are being ridiculously harsh on the OP.

I fully agree that it is not everyone's business where my kids go to college (when they hopefully go!)

That's why I. DON'T. POST. HUNDREDS. OF. PICS. AND. UPDATES. OF. MY. KIDS. ON. SOCIAL. MEDIA.

I'm seeing tons of criticism heaped upon the OP. This low-level curiosity OP and others have about this kids' destination is the 100% natural outcome/consequence of parents who decide to share/glorify every single solitary thing about their kids lives.

OP and the others aren't "nosy busybodies" They are people that have been repeatedly invited to front row seats the the performance piece these parents have decided to make of their families life. To extend the metaphor, suddenly the curtains have been closed in the middle of the performance. Sure, it was free performance, and the audience members can get up and go anytime they want, but it's ridiculous for you all to help scorn on these audience members for turning to each other and asking, "Huh, wonder what happened to the show?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You people are being ridiculously harsh on the OP.

I fully agree that it is not everyone's business where my kids go to college (when they hopefully go!)

That's why I. DON'T. POST. HUNDREDS. OF. PICS. AND. UPDATES. OF. MY. KIDS. ON. SOCIAL. MEDIA.

I'm seeing tons of criticism heaped upon the OP. This low-level curiosity OP and others have about this kids' destination is the 100% natural outcome/consequence of parents who decide to share/glorify every single solitary thing about their kids lives.

OP and the others aren't "nosy busybodies" They are people that have been repeatedly invited to front row seats the the performance piece these parents have decided to make of their families life. To extend the metaphor, suddenly the curtains have been closed in the middle of the performance. Sure, it was free performance, and the audience members can get up and go anytime they want, but it's ridiculous for you all to help scorn on these audience members for turning to each other and asking, "Huh, wonder what happened to the show?"

EQ < 0

[Anonymous]

OP where is your DC going?