DO I TELL THE MOM HER DAUGHTER IS GETTING PROMISCUOUS?

[Anonymous]

You don't know what promiscuous means.

Step away from the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cast of characters here: OP, OP's daughter Larla, Larla's friend GeighGeigh, GeighGeigh's boyfriend Trueaux, GeighGeigh's parents Greg and Leigh.

Should OP tell Greg and Leigh that Larla told OP that GeighGeigh told Larla that GeighGeigh and Trueaux do sexual things together in GeighGeigh's room while Greg and Leigh are home?

No, OP should not.

OP didn't ask whether OP should TELL THE DAD HIS SON IS GETTING PROMISCUOUS, but the answer to that question is also: no.

Not OP, but when you put it that way...but this is why it's good to crowdsource these questions. OP is concerned about her daughter's friend, and that is a good thing- but telling the parents is tattling. The exception would be if the parents somehow didn't know about Trueaux and he's a thirty two year old perv that GeighGeigh met on the internet. Then OP should def talk with Greg and Leigh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD has a friend(under 15) who is dating a boy. According to my DD, these two are getting very involved, sexually. Many times it is in this girl's bedrooms while her parents are downstairs. I seriously doubt the mom knows this stuff is going on, let alone, in her home. Do I say anything? I don't want to betray my daughter. Tell me this is none of my business and not my place to get involved.

If her parents are okay with their 15 year old entertaining her boyfriend upstairs in her bedroom while they are home, then they are probably very okay with her being sexually active.

Those are parents cut from the "I'd rather you do (insert inappropriate or illegal behavior) in my house than out on the street."

Most parents, event the permissive ones, put on at least a pretense of supervision by requiring boyfriend/girlfriend entertaining to occur in a public part of the house so they at least have the opportunity of wandering through now and then with "laundry"

If I were you I would not say anything. They obviously do not care.

What I would do is not allow my kid to hang out at that house because the parents are clearly permissive idiots and will be the ones buying the booze for the kids and offering their house for the parties.

[Anonymous]

PROMISCIOUS YES ABSOLUTELY.

Sexually active with her boyfriend? No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you know what promiscuous means? It doesn't mean what you think it does.

She's sexually active. So are you. Does that mean you are promiscuous?

How do you know that OP is sexually active? And if she's married, then she is not promiscuous if she's sexually active with her husband.

Lots of assumptions on your part, let alone a deficient vocabulary.

[Anonymous]

Op, this is a tough one because I totally understand that you don't want to betray your daughter. At the same time, this is your good friend and her daughter is engaging in risky behavior. Sex under 15 is too young.

I would probably say something along the lines of "Jenny and Tommy are getting pretty hot and heavy these days, aren't they? She is such a sweet girl, I hope you're keeping a close eye on that."

Yes, I would risk pissing my friend off. But hopefully she knows me well enough to realize that I'm not a gossipy, nosy person and that I'm coming from a good place with my concerns.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, this is a tough one because I totally understand that you don't want to betray your daughter. At the same time, this is your good friend and her daughter is engaging in risky behavior. Sex under 15 is too young.

I would probably say something along the lines of "Jenny and Tommy are getting pretty hot and heavy these days, aren't they? She is such a sweet girl, I hope you're keeping a close eye on that."

Yes, I would risk pissing my friend off. But hopefully she knows me well enough to realize that I'm not a gossipy, nosy person and that I'm coming from a good place with my concerns.

If you are in the running for Asshole of the Year, then yes, definitely say this to your friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I’m not crazy about it, but it is normal teen behavior. Abuse? Yes. Drugs or other illegal behavior? Yes. Consensual sex? MYOB.

She's 15. We don't know the age of the boy. This could be statutory rape. As a parent I would want to know

Yes have the boy arrested. maybe he says he was raped and the girl can be arrested also.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the feedback. I am going it to myself and MYOB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, this is a tough one because I totally understand that you don't want to betray your daughter. At the same time, this is your good friend and her daughter is engaging in risky behavior. Sex under 15 is too young.

I would probably say something along the lines of "Jenny and Tommy are getting pretty hot and heavy these days, aren't they? She is such a sweet girl, I hope you're keeping a close eye on that."

Yes, I would risk pissing my friend off. But hopefully she knows me well enough to realize that I'm not a gossipy, nosy person and that I'm coming from a good place with my concerns.

Where in the world did you get that this is OP's friend? Good friend at that? For all we know, OP hardly knows the parents. She said it's her daughter's friend.

[Anonymous]

Am I the only one going to call out OP for calling the girl (not the boy) "promiscuous"? For one partner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, this is a tough one because I totally understand that you don't want to betray your daughter. At the same time, this is your good friend and her daughter is engaging in risky behavior. Sex under 15 is too young.

I would probably say something along the lines of "Jenny and Tommy are getting pretty hot and heavy these days, aren't they? She is such a sweet girl, I hope you're keeping a close eye on that."

Yes, I would risk pissing my friend off. But hopefully she knows me well enough to realize that I'm not a gossipy, nosy person and that I'm coming from a good place with my concerns.

You must have skimmed over the part where mom and dad let her entertain her boyfriend in her bedroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one going to call out OP for calling the girl (not the boy) "promiscuous"? For one partner?

Multiple people have called OP out for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, this is a tough one because I totally understand that you don't want to betray your daughter. At the same time, this is your good friend and her daughter is engaging in risky behavior. Sex under 15 is too young.

I would probably say something along the lines of "Jenny and Tommy are getting pretty hot and heavy these days, aren't they? She is such a sweet girl, I hope you're keeping a close eye on that."

Yes, I would risk pissing my friend off. But hopefully she knows me well enough to realize that I'm not a gossipy, nosy person and that I'm coming from a good place with my concerns.

Where in the world did you get that this is OP's friend? Good friend at that? For all we know, OP hardly knows the parents. She said it's her daughter's friend.

Well, I am assuming that the Op knows this mother well enough to consider actually saying something to her. And I'm also assuming that Op believes the mom would be concerned if she found out that her daughter was sexually active at such a young age.

But, if this friend is already well aware that her daughter and her boyfriend are hanging out in her bedroom with the closing door closed, then she already knows that they are fooling around at the very least and has decided to allow that.

At that point, my concern would be whether or not to allow my own kid to hang around with that girl anymore because that girl is growing up way too fast and my job is to parent my daughter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cast of characters here: OP, OP's daughter Larla, Larla's friend GeighGeigh, GeighGeigh's boyfriend Trueaux, GeighGeigh's parents Greg and Leigh.

Should OP tell Greg and Leigh that Larla told OP that GeighGeigh told Larla that GeighGeigh and Trueaux do sexual things together in GeighGeigh's room while Greg and Leigh are home?

No, OP should not.

OP didn't ask whether OP should TELL THE DAD HIS SON IS GETTING PROMISCUOUS, but the answer to that question is also: no.

+1 (and bonus points for the GeighGeigh reference). The daughter isn't "promiscuous," she is engaging in sexual activity, possibly including having sex, with her boyfriend. Unless you have reason to believe that the boyfriend is over 18 or abusive, MYOB.