How can women not be duped by men?

[Anonymous]

Read about boiled frog syndrome

[Anonymous]

So two pathological narcissists with endless need for validation go on a romantic relationship reality show and you’re surprised that there was a bad outcome?

[Anonymous]

I mean, set boundaries. If your rule is "I will only date for three years and then dump if there's no proposal" then stick to that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am listening to Rachael Kirkconnell's heartbroken conversation on the Call Her Daddy podcast. It makes me really sad to see how she was kept in constant confusion, gaslit and strung along for 5 years before being suddenly broken up with by Matt James, the first black The Bachelor.

She is only 28 and a stunning young woman who seemed to have genuinely believed he loved her and it seems he constantly talked about babies and marriage and proposals.

Her story is being shared on social media by millions of women who feel heard and seen in her description of her tumultuous relationship.

How can we as women protect ourselves from men stringing us along? How can we become empowered in romantic relationships where even today, the man holds the keys to commitment and marriage?

You can protect yourself by not going on a reality show to find a partner. What do you expect?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who would go on The Bachelor or similar shows are not ordinary having ordinary relationships.

This^ and anyone with average IQ and EQ should be able to see red flags withinin one year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who would go on The Bachelor or similar shows are not ordinary having ordinary relationships.

This^ and anyone with average IQ and EQ should be able to see red flags withinin one year.

The cracks are obvious by 6 months. No one can stay on their best behavior for more than 6 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hold out until you find the perfect man who meets 100% of your long list of requirements. A lot of women do that.

Of course, the rate of unmarried single women has gone up lately.. but at least they aren't settling for less than ideal circumstances.

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold out until you find the perfect man who meets 100% of your long list of requirements. A lot of women do that.

Of course, the rate of unmarried single women has gone up lately.. but at least they aren't settling for less than ideal circumstances.

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

But see, this is the problem. Women don't know what is a valid standard to require of a future husband vs what is a nice to have that they could do without.
Because people like you encourage women to feel lucky to receive any male attention at all that they settle for breadcrumbs and end up wasting their prime dating years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who would go on The Bachelor or similar shows are not ordinary having ordinary relationships.

This.

[Anonymous]

Assume every man is a lying POS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold out until you find the perfect man who meets 100% of your long list of requirements. A lot of women do that.

Of course, the rate of unmarried single women has gone up lately.. but at least they aren't settling for less than ideal circumstances.

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

Let's take education as a simple case. A woman who went to college probably wants a man who also went to college. But, university enrollment at the undergrad level at most universities is 60-40 male-female. So just on that measure, and it's not a lot to ask for, and it's 3 women competing for 2 men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold out until you find the perfect man who meets 100% of your long list of requirements. A lot of women do that.

Of course, the rate of unmarried single women has gone up lately.. but at least they aren't settling for less than ideal circumstances.

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

Let's take education as a simple case. A woman who went to college probably wants a man who also went to college. But, university enrollment at the undergrad level at most universities is 60-40 male-female. So just on that measure, and it's not a lot to ask for, and it's 3 women competing for 2 men.

False premise.

[Anonymous]

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

But see, this is the problem. Women don't know what is a valid standard to require of a future husband vs what is a nice to have that they could do without.
Because people like you encourage women to feel lucky to receive any male attention at all that they settle for breadcrumbs and end up wasting their prime dating years.

NP - The first poster did not say they encourage women to feel lucky to receive any male attention.

The poster stated the truth, which is that women often confuse their hookup value with the lifetime partner value. Using the example above, the 6 woman who hooked up with the 10 man will 1) let the 10 breadcrumber for the occasional hookup, 2) let other attractive men do the same, and 3) hold out for 8 or above man to marry.

The truth is the 8+ man will not marry the 6- girl. He wants his equal, an 8+ woman. However, he will nail as many 6 (and below) girls as possible because they let him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold out until you find the perfect man who meets 100% of your long list of requirements. A lot of women do that.

Of course, the rate of unmarried single women has gone up lately.. but at least they aren't settling for less than ideal circumstances.

Is this a joke? Women’s unrealistic dating standards are already overwhelmingly responsible for the current broken dating market. In our “cheap sex” culture, of course some man who is a 10 was willing to bang a woman who is a 6 a few times. Now the 6 forevermore thinks she deserves to be married to a 10, not understanding that there’s a difference between who men will sleep with when they’re horny and who they will make a lifetime commitment to.

Advising women to hold out for “the perfect man who meets 100% of [their] long list of requirements” is actually insane. Do you think your dad was a 100% perfect Prince Charming? No, he was a human being with flaws, just like your mom—and yet society thrived with these matches.

Let's take education as a simple case. A woman who went to college probably wants a man who also went to college. But, university enrollment at the undergrad level at most universities is 60-40 male-female. So just on that measure, and it's not a lot to ask for, and it's 3 women competing for 2 men.

False premise.

Ask the DCUM crowd if they will settle for a man who is not college-educated. Few will.

[Anonymous]

For gods sakes, if your goal is marriage, do not date someone for five years. After 18 months, tell the guy you need to start dating other people.