S/O what do you gain from maintaining a a friendship with a man whose wife hates you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Let's be honest here. It is because women know that most men aren't really friends with women just for being friends. It might have ended that way, but most guys always have an ulterior motive. Any woman that is not butt ugly has experienced that. Friends only till he starts pursuing you. So, while women might never be into that guy friend, he was, in 99%, into that female friend, if he is straight, at one point, and hoped for something. So year, she might not be worried that the female friend has feeling for her DH, she is most likely worried about his feelings for you.


+1.

I don't know any men who are interested in close friendships with women.

So my husband has a few close female friends, but he was friends with them before we met (so he's known them for a long time). I have absolutely no issue with that - it makes sense that he would continue these friendships (even if they started out as him being interested in something more, they never went that way). But I would be weirded out and concerned if, now that we are married, DH suddenly made a new close female friend. Does that make sense? I'm not sure, but it is how I feel.

It makes sense to me. I shut down a budding friendship between my dh and a woman (Larla) once. I never got the feeling she wanted anything more than someone to ride biking trails with, but I didn't like it. Dh was fine with cutting her off (creating distance). Months later, my friend (through whom we met Larla) told me that her husband and Larla had had a brief friendship based on a different shared hobby, but Larla did want more from him, and went a little crazy on them when they cut her out.

Anyway, my story is anecdotal, but I think once in your 30s, it's rare for a single person to really be ok with pursuing a strictly platonic friendship with the opposite sex. It just is.

+1

?

I think it’s precious how all these jealous women just HAPPEN to have all these other women prowling around thier amazing, yet innocent and unsuspecting husbands.

Seriously, sometimes all a girl wants is for someone to go mountain biking with her, because all the other girls are too busy at home in a tizzy about dining room furniture.

I'm a pp. It was one woman prowling around two husbands. And as it turned out, with the other husband, she did actually want more.

Yeah, sometimes a girl just wants to go mountain biking. But you're being disingenuous if you just so happen to have the same hobby as this married guy, oh and the same different hobby as this other married man, and zero female friends to enjoy them with. That's BS.