D14 Deleting My FB Posts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are there so many kids who oppose so vehemently to having their pictures on FB? Isn't this the age of social media? As long as it is a flattering picture - God knows they are almost all posting TONS of those themselves - what about it gets them so bent out of shape? And even if the parent gets their approval that they like the way they look in it?

I have three - 16, 14, and 12 - none of them could care less. Help me understand.

Your children are obviously not the same children as the OPs D. Well your children may not mind, obviously it is different for that other child. Respect the difference

...which is why I didn't ask OP the question, but put it out in general to the tons of parents who said the same. I'm hoping to understand the difference.

My DD is 13. On her 11th birthday (before she had an IG account) , I took a pic to post to FB and Ig of her with her cupcake. She said, mom I don't like it when you post pics of me on FB. So I stopped. She now has IG and posts no selfies. She thinks they're stupid. She will post pictures of random things or with her friends but I respect that she likes to have control of what pictures of her are on the internet. It isnt important to me to have my kids on FB so I don't care. She seems to make pretty good decisions about what to post on her own account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not post photos of your teenager on social media. You do not have that right as a parent. The fact that you do it rarely doesn't matter. This is not the same as showing your friends a photo of her awards ceremony. Once it's onlin, it's there forever and you have no control of who sees it. You may think you do, but you don't. She doesn't need to "STFU" about it. You need to stop posting any photos of her.

--Parent of a 15 and 10 year old.

Agree with this. I post photos of my kids, but the second they tell me to stop, I will. They absolutely have a right to their own privacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are there so many kids who oppose so vehemently to having their pictures on FB? Isn't this the age of social media? As long as it is a flattering picture - God knows they are almost all posting TONS of those themselves - what about it gets them so bent out of shape? And even if the parent gets their approval that they like the way they look in it?

I have three - 16, 14, and 12 - none of them could care less. Help me understand.

Your children are obviously not the same children as the OPs D. Well your children may not mind, obviously it is different for that other child. Respect the difference

...which is why I didn't ask OP the question, but put it out in general to the tons of parents who said the same. I'm hoping to understand the difference.

My DD is 13. On her 11th birthday (before she had an IG account) , I took a pic to post to FB and Ig of her with her cupcake. She said, mom I don't like it when you post pics of me on FB. So I stopped. She now has IG and posts no selfies. She thinks they're stupid. She will post pictures of random things or with her friends but I respect that she likes to have control of what pictures of her are on the internet. It isnt important to me to have my kids on FB so I don't care. She seems to make pretty good decisions about what to post on her own account.

In her case, it makes perfect sense. What about in the case where teens post incessant selfies on their own accounts but won't "allow" their parents to post a pic now and again? Seems like a control issue and the teen has made it clear who holds that position. Hard to imagine that FB pictures are the only area in which parents have decided their teen can control them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are there so many kids who oppose so vehemently to having their pictures on FB? Isn't this the age of social media? As long as it is a flattering picture - God knows they are almost all posting TONS of those themselves - what about it gets them so bent out of shape? And even if the parent gets their approval that they like the way they look in it?

I have three - 16, 14, and 12 - none of them could care less. Help me understand.

Your children are obviously not the same children as the OPs D. Well your children may not mind, obviously it is different for that other child. Respect the difference

...which is why I didn't ask OP the question, but put it out in general to the tons of parents who said the same. I'm hoping to understand the difference.

My DD is 13. On her 11th birthday (before she had an IG account) , I took a pic to post to FB and Ig of her with her cupcake. She said, mom I don't like it when you post pics of me on FB. So I stopped. She now has IG and posts no selfies. She thinks they're stupid. She will post pictures of random things or with her friends but I respect that she likes to have control of what pictures of her are on the internet. It isnt important to me to have my kids on FB so I don't care. She seems to make pretty good decisions about what to post on her own account.

In her case, it makes perfect sense. What about in the case where teens post incessant selfies on their own accounts but won't "allow" their parents to post a pic now and again? Seems like a control issue and the teen has made it clear who holds that position. Hard to imagine that FB pictures are the only area in which parents have decided their teen can control them.

How's it any different. Once they get a certain age they want independence to post what they want their parents to stop posting pics of them. Lots of my friends kids are like this. Seems like a small thing to give them control of so that we can still have a relationship to influence in more consequential matters.

[Anonymous]

I find that the biggest problem here is that the OP obviously sees himself as the victim of a terrible divorce, and cannot see that the real victim is his DD. He says that he wants to stop paying for the divorce. Unfortunately, the fact that he and his wife both made choices that resulted in his daughter having to live with a broken home is something that doesn't just get paid off. Look, sometimes divorce happens, and good people end up making the choice to end a bad relationship. But, to ignore the fact that his daughter is an innocent party who will also have to "pay" for the divorce is the height of self-aborption.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find that the biggest problem here is that the OP obviously sees himself as the victim of a terrible divorce, and cannot see that the real victim is his DD. He says that he wants to stop paying for the divorce. Unfortunately, the fact that he and his wife both made choices that resulted in his daughter having to live with a broken home is something that doesn't just get paid off. Look, sometimes divorce happens, and good people end up making the choice to end a bad relationship. But, to ignore the fact that his daughter is an innocent party who will also have to "pay" for the divorce is the height of self-aborption.

I agree. He also thinks his wife is brainwashing his daughter and they are spying him. It is not a surprise it ended up in divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find that the biggest problem here is that the OP obviously sees himself as the victim of a terrible divorce, and cannot see that the real victim is his DD. He says that he wants to stop paying for the divorce. Unfortunately, the fact that he and his wife both made choices that resulted in his daughter having to live with a broken home is something that doesn't just get paid off. Look, sometimes divorce happens, and good people end up making the choice to end a bad relationship. But, to ignore the fact that his daughter is an innocent party who will also have to "pay" for the divorce is the height of self-aborption.

I agree. He also thinks his wife is brainwashing his daughter and they are spying him. It is not a surprise it ended up in divorce.

Agree. Though I think it's weird he characterizes it as his daughter spying on him and giving the info to her mom and blames his daughter for it. Uhm, pretty sure this is the mom's doing and your daughter is already suffering/stuck in the middle without you blaming her.