Frustrated with husband and mother in law

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

Uh huh.

Surrreeeeee, this “fact” is revealed pages and pages and days later when you see the tide turned against you.

LOL. I don’t engage with liars, so bye, OP.

[Anonymous]

If the pay were fair you'd have been able to hire someone to do it instead of leaning on family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the pay were fair you'd have been able to hire someone to do it instead of leaning on family.

Which I also offered to do to her. We said we had a nanny willing and she wanted to do it. I also offered her just staying at our house but having a nanny there full time so a family member was there but she didn’t have any responsibility of sitting and she said no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

Do you not understand that there's a big difference between 31 and 61? I'm starting to think this is all going to be a wonderful life lesson for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the pay were fair you'd have been able to hire someone to do it instead of leaning on family.

Which I also offered to do to her. We said we had a nanny willing and she wanted to do it. I also offered her just staying at our house but having a nanny there full time so a family member was there but she didn’t have any responsibility of sitting and she said no.

BS. Then call the nanny up now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

Do you not understand that there's a big difference between 31 and 61? I'm starting to think this is all going to be a wonderful life lesson for you.

Many of you are 50’s and 60’s. Are you really saying you couldn’t watch a kid one hour a day,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

Do you not understand that there's a big difference between 31 and 61? I'm starting to think this is all going to be a wonderful life lesson for you.

Many of you are 50’s and 60’s. Are you really saying you couldn’t watch a kid one hour a day,

Not in 50s or 60s and it's not one kid and its not one hour. Kids wake up and need breakfast, dinner, bathing, and what if they get sick in the middle of the night. Are you actually the parent of 2 young kids? You can't imagine all the things that might go wrong and how the responsibility might be overwhelming? I'm starting to smell a in law hating troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

Can you really not perceive that this was stressing her out and she doesn't feel capable of handling it? It is unfortunate that your plans had to change, but you really seem to have zero understanding that you were still asking for A LOT and that she can't do it. The fact that you were paying her and doing all that other stuff (ordering in dinner every night for 12 nights? ok) makes it even higher pressure in some ways. It's like you set it all up so she could have no possible way to say no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

Do you not understand that there's a big difference between 31 and 61? I'm starting to think this is all going to be a wonderful life lesson for you.

Many of you are 50’s and 60’s. Are you really saying you couldn’t watch a kid one hour a day,

Not in 50s or 60s and it's not one kid and its not one hour. Kids wake up and need breakfast, dinner, bathing, and what if they get sick in the middle of the night. Are you actually the parent of 2 young kids? You can't imagine all the things that might go wrong and how the responsibility might be overwhelming? I'm starting to smell a in law hating troll.

My kids make their own breakfast everyday. Waffle and fruit. My kids shower themselves and shampoo their own hair. We have a list of 10 families to call in case of an emergency that live within a mile of our house. It’s really not that hard. Also just say no but 3 days before is a little much to spring it on us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

Do you not understand that there's a big difference between 31 and 61? I'm starting to think this is all going to be a wonderful life lesson for you.

Many of you are 50’s and 60’s. Are you really saying you couldn’t watch a kid one hour a day,

Not in 50s or 60s and it's not one kid and its not one hour. Kids wake up and need breakfast, dinner, bathing, and what if they get sick in the middle of the night. Are you actually the parent of 2 young kids? You can't imagine all the things that might go wrong and how the responsibility might be overwhelming? I'm starting to smell a in law hating troll.

My kids make their own breakfast everyday. Waffle and fruit. My kids shower themselves and shampoo their own hair. We have a list of 10 families to call in case of an emergency that live within a mile of our house. It’s really not that hard. Also just say no but 3 days before is a little much to spring it on us.

Your 4 and 6 year olds? So is that really your position - your 4 and 6 year olds don't need any care other than being physically transported places?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I really don't relate to posters who are defending the grandmother. Any responsible person would make sure to cancel before anything is set in stone. It has nothing to do with length of trip, etc. The Grandma knew this before hand. Don't give me the "cold feet" crap. Grandma just ruined the start of OP's holiday and OP is left trying to salvage some fun and relaxation. Any of you would be furious if someone did this to your plans! I would.

A few years ago I had agreed to take care of a friend's two dogs when they went on a two-week vacation. The day they left I had to have emergency cholecystectomy. My DH was out of town and all three children away. I called her while the ambulance was taking me to hospital. I felt terrible for her but she understood that things happen. Maybe OP's MIL did not have emergency surgery but other things could have happened. Frankly, OP sounds selfish and self-consumed. I would never have left children that young for 12 days and if my MIL needed money, I would give it to her without an expectation of having her work for the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

Can you really not perceive that this was stressing her out and she doesn't feel capable of handling it? It is unfortunate that your plans had to change, but you really seem to have zero understanding that you were still asking for A LOT and that she can't do it. The fact that you were paying her and doing all that other stuff (ordering in dinner every night for 12 nights? ok) makes it even higher pressure in some ways. It's like you set it all up so she could have no possible way to say no.

Again, damned if you do damned if you don’t. We use a local meal delivery service and if we asked her to do anything and didn’t offer to pay people would be jumping all over that. Just say NO. But don’t do it 3 days before. We know many families where the grandparents take the kids for granny camp, are full time nannies (get paid by parents) and many that are involved in the kids lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason she decided she changed her mind was because she stayed to watch our dog when we were away for a night as a family and my husband messed up the tv remote control and it started from “I’m
not watching the kids anymore” because she was upset about the remote and it turned into “I’m not doing this for you anymore”. I’m fine with whatever she decide: and now we are taking the kids but don’t get upset about something and change your mind a few days before the trip because it costs us big time.

It's too much for her. The dog, the kids, etc. Get that through your thick skull. Get over the money aspect and don't use that to guilt trip her or hang over her head. She doesn't want to do it so it doesn't happen. Now you know not to rely on her in the future.

This is all so bizarre. She is 61 and in good health. Literally a few years older than some of you saying she can’t handle it.

You sound like a slave driver. Why should she take care of your kids when you yourself don't want to take care of them? Take your kids with you for vacations, you lunatic. Also, tie your tubes and don't have more kids.