Dad’s girlfriend has officially taken over

[Anonymous]

My dad’s long term girlfriend moved in with him this past year and slowly she’s been getting more and more control over him. It’s now at the point where he barely sees his kids and grandkids, even though some of them live 3 minutes away. If he comes over, she calls nonstop because she “needs” him to come home and open a jar or whatever.

This Christmas, he didn’t see his own kids or grandkids and got them no presents bc GF decided “no gifts” this year. They spent the day with her kids and got them gifts.

Really sad about this. I don’t care so much about the gifts - money isn’t important - but that he’s now not even allowed to see his own family. I really never thought he would let a woman control him this much.

[Anonymous]

With that attitude, I can't imagine why she doesn't want to spend time with you.

[Anonymous]

Confront him before it’s too late.

You have nothing to lose. Take the high road and you’ll be watching all his stuff go to her kids, and you’ll be begging for th photo albums.

[Anonymous]

Is he mentally ok?

[Anonymous]

That’s heartbreaking. This happened to my ex husband after he met his girlfriend- not allowed to see kids, friends, family.
It’s controlling behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Confront him before it’s too late.

You have nothing to lose. Take the high road and you’ll be watching all his stuff go to her kids, and you’ll be begging for th photo albums.

lol. Yeah, going after the inheritance is definitely the way to rebuild a relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With that attitude, I can't imagine why she doesn't want to spend time with you.

What’s wrong with OP’s attitude? I think OP sounds more than reasonable. Are you dad’s GF?

[Anonymous]

Take him to lunch and talk honestly with him. Tell him it’s up to him, not her, whethyhe has a relationship with you, but he’s giving her that power.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With that attitude, I can't imagine why she doesn't want to spend time with you.

What’s wrong with OP’s attitude? I think OP sounds more than reasonable. Are you dad’s GF?

Serious stepmom vibes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Confront him before it’s too late.

You have nothing to lose. Take the high road and you’ll be watching all his stuff go to her kids, and you’ll be begging for th photo albums.

lol. Yeah, going after the inheritance is definitely the way to rebuild a relationship.

OP. So for inheritance, I don’t necessarily care about the money itself. If he chose to leave everything to my siblings and nothing to me, I’d be fine with that because it’s staying in the family and I trust my siblings not to squander it.

But I do have a real problem if he leaves everything to her and her kids. She doesn’t work, so it’s a very real possibility she could convince him to leave her our childhood house so she has a place to stay, leave her money for her kids’ college tuition (they are high school age), etc.

I don’t think that’s unreasonable.

But more importantly, I want to be able to see my dad. I want him to be able to see his grandkids without it being an issue with her.

[Anonymous]

What are the ages here, OP?

How long have your parents not been together?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take him to lunch and talk honestly with him. Tell him it’s up to him, not her, whethyhe has a relationship with you, but he’s giving her that power.

This. Have lunch. Phones off. Tell him how you feel about not seeing him, about your kids not seeing him, etc. Ask him how he sees it.

Unfortunately, he’s an adult and can choose what life he wants.

I seriously don’t understand people like his GF who want so much control over others. Must be the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With that attitude, I can't imagine why she doesn't want to spend time with you.

What’s wrong with OP’s attitude? I think OP sounds more than reasonable. Are you dad’s GF?

Read the post again. Does that sound like someone who is pleasant to be around? You don't think that's going to come out other ways?

[Anonymous]

Tale as old as time. I'm sorry op. If you can get him alone, talk to him and tell him how you feel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take him to lunch and talk honestly with him. Tell him it’s up to him, not her, whethyhe has a relationship with you, but he’s giving her that power.

This. Have lunch. Phones off. Tell him how you feel about not seeing him, about your kids not seeing him, etc. Ask him how he sees it.

Unfortunately, he’s an adult and can choose what life he wants.

I seriously don’t understand people like his GF who want so much control over others. Must be the money.

It’s all scripted… passive aggression then aggression, then totally cut off the kids of her daddy warbucks.

Hopefully, he still has some stones left. Time will tell.