DD's teacher (innocent or inappropriate)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any truth to it? If no, its not appropriate. I would email the teacher and ask about the comment and ask if there is anything about the relationship you should be concerned about.

Really? You would police the minutiae of a conversation you didn't hear?

For my child's safety, yes. If he knows something he can just simply say there is a reason for concern. Otherwise, its an inappropriate comment and why would he say that.

This.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s important to note that there is a difference between inappropriate and predatory. This was inappropriate to an extent. Not predatory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is concerned, not jealous.

Because no teacher ever 'sets his eyes' on a student.

[Anonymous]

Or it could have been a bad “dad joke”, like “how’s the weather up there, Stretch?” to a very tall kid. Teacher thinks he’s funny and no one else does.

Inappropriate and poor choice of words, but my brain does not go to grooming. My second guess is that the teacher knows something about the boyfriend.

A lot is going to depend on the tone of the way he said it, which we did not hear.

[Anonymous]

Maybe the teacher just saw the boyfriend flirting with/asking out another girl. Nothing too terrible, but the words just came out of the teacher’s mouth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is concerned, not jealous.

Because no teacher ever 'sets his eyes' on a student.

And no teacher has ever simply been concerned. We can go back and forth all day. See how this works?

[Anonymous]

Parental vigilance is essential these days. Better for the creepy teacher to know that OP is most definitely one of "those" parents.

The creeps will target the kid with the all-trusting parents. These predators ain't dumb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is concerned, not jealous.

Because no teacher ever 'sets his eyes' on a student.

And no teacher has ever simply been concerned. We can go back and forth all day. See how this works?

Concern is fine. A male teacher telling a female student to drop her boyfriend off the cuff is totally outrageous. Any apology for his overstepping? Why not?

[Anonymous]

Why didn’t she ask him why he made the comment? Instead of all the speculating about motivation? I don’t understand why she said nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any truth to it? If no, its not appropriate. I would email the teacher and ask about the comment and ask if there is anything about the relationship you should be concerned about.

Really? You would police the minutiae of a conversation you didn't hear?

For my child's safety, yes. If he knows something he can just simply say there is a reason for concern. Otherwise, its an inappropriate comment and why would he say that.

This.

Don’t email. Call on the phone. He is more likely to tell you something if he knows it isn’t written forever for anyone to see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any truth to it? If no, its not appropriate. I would email the teacher and ask about the comment and ask if there is anything about the relationship you should be concerned about.

Really? You would police the minutiae of a conversation you didn't hear?

For my child's safety, yes. If he knows something he can just simply say there is a reason for concern. Otherwise, its an inappropriate comment and why would he say that.

This.

Don’t email. Call on the phone. He is more likely to tell you something if he knows it isn’t written forever for anyone to see.

No he won't. He won't remember the comment at all because it was made innocuously. He would also sense this is a parent out for blood and wanting to accuse him of impropriety, so wouldn't say anything to avoid making this into "a thing". Do you remember every single thing you say to every single person in a day? Maybe he said it, maybe he didn't. Maybe the student heard him wrong. Maybe she reported what she wanted to hear the teacher say. There are WAY too many variables. Leave it alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any truth to it? If no, its not appropriate. I would email the teacher and ask about the comment and ask if there is anything about the relationship you should be concerned about.

Really? You would police the minutiae of a conversation you didn't hear?

For my child's safety, yes. If he knows something he can just simply say there is a reason for concern. Otherwise, its an inappropriate comment and why would he say that.

This.

Don’t email. Call on the phone. He is more likely to tell you something if he knows it isn’t written forever for anyone to see.

No he won't. He won't remember the comment at all because it was made innocuously. He would also sense this is a parent out for blood and wanting to accuse him of impropriety, so wouldn't say anything to avoid making this into "a thing". Do you remember every single thing you say to every single person in a day? Maybe he said it, maybe he didn't. Maybe the student heard him wrong. Maybe she reported what she wanted to hear the teacher say. There are WAY too many variables. Leave it alone.

Your posts are creepy.

[Anonymous]

As I said earlier it was professionally inappropriate to breach that Chinese wall between student/teacher personal lives. However he does have plausible deniabily and it seems your daughter gave him no encouragement. It may stop here and it is prudent to not fight a fight that doesn't need to be fought. Also, although it was inappropriate, in my estimation it has not presently risen to the level of harrassment. A firm rebuke like "Its none of your business" or some equivalent are scolding enough words to back off any normal man.

If your daughter did well in his class she most certainly should ask him for a college recommendation; she earned it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why didn’t she ask him why he made the comment? Instead of all the speculating about motivation? I don’t understand why she said nothing.

Maybe she was shocked he would say something? Or embarrassed? I can imagine not questioning a teacher if he had said something like that to me. It is very common to freeze, especially for girls/women.

[Anonymous]

I think it's innocent AND inappropriate. He's not being lecherous or anything but it's also none of his business. I think your daughter should not allow similar breaches. Coach her to respond with, "because that is part of my personal, not my academic life, it's not appropriate for us to discuss. So let's please not bring up this issue again".

If he does something similar after that, time for you to intervene.