Elite privates and social dynamics for a fat mom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Your post makes very little sense to men. Neither 1) nor 2) has any logical relationship to whether a woman might be treated differently in a specific community because she's overweight. FWIW, I don't like seeing people make assumptions about other women based in the fact that they're skinny or blond, either. I'd like to see more compassion and less judgment, but I've been on DCUM long enough to know that along with some very nice people, it's full of those who delight in hurtful snarks.

I am OP, BTW, and I'm not a troll. I don't live outside the beltway. I have two degrees from HYP schools. I did meet my husband at the HYP where I received my advanced degree. He is of normal weight and in IMHO quite handsome. We're still very much in love. I have many friends -- some professional, some SAHMs -- outside the private school my DC attends. I'm generally a pretty happy person.

Thanks to all who offered kind advice and insights. This is not our first private school; we have two children in other privates. We have donated, volunteered, been active in classroom events. I notice other new moms in DC's class being welcomed in a way I have not. I'm a friendly, outgoing person, so I've been puzzled more than anything else. It's true that everyone has more in common with some people than others. However, at the other two schools, the communities seemed more welcoming and open.

The one mom who has been friendly (and is overweight herself) has been at the school for a while, and I notice she is treated in a similar way. She's a lovely person with a great sense of humor. The other moms are polite to her, but she's also not included in the mom get-togethers, and her child also seems to have few play dates. That's what made me begin to wonder if weight/appearances might be a factor. I also noticed that some of same moms who are polite and distant with me have little difficulty chatting up my husband! He commented on that himself, wondering why a couple of women he's seen be almost rude to me were very friendly with him.

One caveat is that I don't know many moms outside DC's classroom, so perhaps what I perceive to be cliquishness is particular to a small group of moms.

I appreciate the advice to focus on DC's happiness. Of course we plan to, but I do wonder whether the fact that DC has fewer play dates than DC's siblings will bother DC after a while. So far, it's not been noticed. We plan on staying at the school for now and seeing how the social situation evolves for DC.

There are definitely 100% pockets of this behavior in DC. Not in every school or in every grade or class in every school. But it exists.
We were in a preschool like this---other moms would look through me like I didn't exist despite being introduced to me 10 times. I'd smile and say hello and get nothing in return and yet our 3 year olds played together happily for 4 hours a day. Meanwhile
the other moms were air-kissing and fawning all over each other.

We left that school and have never experienced that culture again. I have friends at that school and they've had mixed experiences---some classes are great, others have more of that toxic snobbery.
We've since moved on to several other school (preschool and elementary--I have 3 kids) and have never experienced it again. We've met life long friends at our current elementary--families we vacation with, spend holidays with etc.

Those who are saying that this stuff doesn't exist in the DC private preschool/elementary school world are just wrong and mean themselves. It would be quite possible to never encounter it (by luck of who is in your school or your child's class) but it does happen.

[Anonymous]

Your fatness ruins the glamour vibe at a place like STA, SSSA, and Landon. Transfer to a more crunchy school if you are at one of these. You will be happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is amazing how quickly those skinny cliques close ranks on the recently divorced skinny SAHM.

They don't want her anywhere near THEIR husband.

Well if you just lost your wealthy husband, where is the easiest place to find another one quickly?

Troll, I know a couple single parents at DC's Big 3 Private ( both single women and single Dads ) and I don't know ANYONE who would think dipping into that fish bowl is good form.

We all have a wide variety of interests and busy professional lives on top of being a parent. Honestly, the last thing on my mind is flirting with some other parents Ex.

Conversely, it is more likely for the class of parents to support both partners through the divorce transition as well as the kids.

Again, I don't know anyone who uses their child's school as a place to scout for a paramour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Your post makes very little sense to men. Neither 1) nor 2) has any logical relationship to whether a woman might be treated differently in a specific community because she's overweight. FWIW, I don't like seeing people make assumptions about other women based in the fact that they're skinny or blond, either. I'd like to see more compassion and less judgment, but I've been on DCUM long enough to know that along with some very nice people, it's full of those who delight in hurtful snarks.

I am OP, BTW, and I'm not a troll. I don't live outside the beltway. I have two degrees from HYP schools. I did meet my husband at the HYP where I received my advanced degree. He is of normal weight and in IMHO quite handsome. We're still very much in love. I have many friends -- some professional, some SAHMs -- outside the private school my DC attends. I'm generally a pretty happy person.

Thanks to all who offered kind advice and insights. This is not our first private school; we have two children in other privates. We have donated, volunteered, been active in classroom events. I notice other new moms in DC's class being welcomed in a way I have not. I'm a friendly, outgoing person, so I've been puzzled more than anything else. It's true that everyone has more in common with some people than others. However, at the other two schools, the communities seemed more welcoming and open.

The one mom who has been friendly (and is overweight herself) has been at the school for a while, and I notice she is treated in a similar way. She's a lovely person with a great sense of humor. The other moms are polite to her, but she's also not included in the mom get-togethers, and her child also seems to have few play dates. That's what made me begin to wonder if weight/appearances might be a factor. I also noticed that some of same moms who are polite and distant with me have little difficulty chatting up my husband! He commented on that himself, wondering why a couple of women he's seen be almost rude to me were very friendly with him.

One caveat is that I don't know many moms outside DC's classroom, so perhaps what I perceive to be cliquishness is particular to a small group of moms.

I appreciate the advice to focus on DC's happiness. Of course we plan to, but I do wonder whether the fact that DC has fewer play dates than DC's siblings will bother DC after a while. So far, it's not been noticed. We plan on staying at the school for now and seeing how the social situation evolves for DC.

There are definitely 100% pockets of this behavior in DC. Not in every school or in every grade or class in every school. But it exists.
We were in a preschool like this---other moms would look through me like I didn't exist despite being introduced to me 10 times. I'd smile and say hello and get nothing in return and yet our 3 year olds played together happily for 4 hours a day. Meanwhile
the other moms were air-kissing and fawning all over each other.

We left that school and have never experienced that culture again. I have friends at that school and they've had mixed experiences---some classes are great, others have more of that toxic snobbery.
We've since moved on to several other school (preschool and elementary--I have 3 kids) and have never experienced it again. We've met life long friends at our current elementary--families we vacation with, spend holidays with etc.

Those who are saying that this stuff doesn't exist in the DC private preschool/elementary school world are just wrong and mean themselves. It would be quite possible to never encounter it (by luck of who is in your school or your child's class) but it does happen.

Well, thanks for proving my point, OP. So if you are such a happy and content person why on earth did you feel the need to start this thread. Honestly, I think this is all in your head. If you were to pass me at DC's school in the hallway, from what you have written at least, you would assume that because I am physically fit and blonde , that I am shallow because I have never sought you out as a friend.

Meanwhile , I work two jobs, am a single parent and most times if I am not talking to someone I am trying to figure out how to get my retaining wall fixed, what kind of new furnace I need to buy, how can i get my groceries AND make it to the bank AND get DC home to study for two tests tomorrow.

Truly, truly I am not passing you by with only a casual smile or " superficial hello" because you are over weight. It is simply because I am BUSY and pre-occupied and I assure NOT thinking at all about my blonde hair, whcih I was born with or my figure which I am genetically disposed to have without much effort.

Is it my fault you seem to deeply resent me when you don't even know me just based on my physical appearance and the fact that I have not sought out your friendship.

Get a grip !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a life. This is your kid's school not your school where you are jockeying to make friends and be with the in crowd. I gather that you probably did not have a happy school experience and relive your feelings of inadequacy in every semi social situation like drop off and pickup. Pathetic. Go on a diet and see a therapist.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Your post makes very little sense to men. Neither 1) nor 2) has any logical relationship to whether a woman might be treated differently in a specific community because she's overweight. FWIW, I don't like seeing people make assumptions about other women based in the fact that they're skinny or blond, either. I'd like to see more compassion and less judgment, but I've been on DCUM long enough to know that along with some very nice people, it's full of those who delight in hurtful snarks.

I am OP, BTW, and I'm not a troll. I don't live outside the beltway. I have two degrees from HYP schools. I did meet my husband at the HYP where I received my advanced degree. He is of normal weight and in IMHO quite handsome. We're still very much in love. I have many friends -- some professional, some SAHMs -- outside the private school my DC attends. I'm generally a pretty happy person.

Thanks to all who offered kind advice and insights. This is not our first private school; we have two children in other privates. We have donated, volunteered, been active in classroom events. I notice other new moms in DC's class being welcomed in a way I have not. I'm a friendly, outgoing person, so I've been puzzled more than anything else. It's true that everyone has more in common with some people than others. However, at the other two schools, the communities seemed more welcoming and open.

The one mom who has been friendly (and is overweight herself) has been at the school for a while, and I notice she is treated in a similar way. She's a lovely person with a great sense of humor. The other moms are polite to her, but she's also not included in the mom get-togethers, and her child also seems to have few play dates. That's what made me begin to wonder if weight/appearances might be a factor. I also noticed that some of same moms who are polite and distant with me have little difficulty chatting up my husband! He commented on that himself, wondering why a couple of women he's seen be almost rude to me were very friendly with him.

One caveat is that I don't know many moms outside DC's classroom, so perhaps what I perceive to be cliquishness is particular to a small group of moms.

I appreciate the advice to focus on DC's happiness. Of course we plan to, but I do wonder whether the fact that DC has fewer play dates than DC's siblings will bother DC after a while. So far, it's not been noticed. We plan on staying at the school for now and seeing how the social situation evolves for DC.

There are definitely 100% pockets of this behavior in DC. Not in every school or in every grade or class in every school. But it exists.
We were in a preschool like this---other moms would look through me like I didn't exist despite being introduced to me 10 times. I'd smile and say hello and get nothing in return and yet our 3 year olds played together happily for 4 hours a day. Meanwhile
the other moms were air-kissing and fawning all over each other.

We left that school and have never experienced that culture again. I have friends at that school and they've had mixed experiences---some classes are great, others have more of that toxic snobbery.
We've since moved on to several other school (preschool and elementary--I have 3 kids) and have never experienced it again. We've met life long friends at our current elementary--families we vacation with, spend holidays with etc.

Those who are saying that this stuff doesn't exist in the DC private preschool/elementary school world are just wrong and mean themselves. It would be quite possible to never encounter it (by luck of who is in your school or your child's class) but it does happen.

Well, thanks for proving my point, OP. So if you are such a happy and content person why on earth did you feel the need to start this thread. Honestly, I think this is all in your head. If you were to pass me at DC's school in the hallway, from what you have written at least, you would assume that because I am physically fit and blonde , that I am shallow because I have never sought you out as a friend.

Meanwhile , I work two jobs, am a single parent and most times if I am not talking to someone I am trying to figure out how to get my retaining wall fixed, what kind of new furnace I need to buy, how can i get my groceries AND make it to the bank AND get DC home to study for two tests tomorrow.

Truly, truly I am not passing you by with only a casual smile or " superficial hello" because you are over weight. It is simply because I am BUSY and pre-occupied and I assure NOT thinking at all about my blonde hair, whcih I was born with or my figure which I am genetically disposed to have without much effort.

Is it my fault you seem to deeply resent me when you don't even know me just based on my physical appearance and the fact that I have not sought out your friendship.

Get a grip !

+1.

OP suffers from poorly managed inferiority complex

[Anonymous]

OP if you are correct about these people, that they are basically old mean girls, why would you want to send your kid to a school where he's likely going to absorb the values of people like this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Based on your writing ability one can infer that you were not one of the individuals who met their spouse at Harvard Law School.

True. My spelling and grammar are deficient. Guess what, by all metrics I am pretty successful . Most importantly, my DC is happy and healthy and doing very well in school.

Oh, and I am also blonde and athletic. For the OP, that seems to be an offense in and of itself.

If you have poor written grammar and you are blonde , lets jump ALL OVER THAT in a rush to feel superior.

Meanwhile, our hair color is something we are born with , as is our physiology.

Were I to have married for money and be a house wife and trade on my looks , then you might have a fair criticism. However, you know nothing about what I do for a living, how I earn my income, or my relationship history.

To project onto anyone who is blonde and thin is just that , a projection . Its a projection of your own feelings of hostility towards yourself onto a target you resent.

I find it really surprising that a woman or man who is reasonably successful and who has attained middle age would even CARE about who is pretty or not any more.

F+ck it , we are all 40's and 50's anyway . WHO CARES

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Your post makes very little sense to men. Neither 1) nor 2) has any logical relationship to whether a woman might be treated differently in a specific community because she's overweight. FWIW, I don't like seeing people make assumptions about other women based in the fact that they're skinny or blond, either. I'd like to see more compassion and less judgment, but I've been on DCUM long enough to know that along with some very nice people, it's full of those who delight in hurtful snarks.

I am OP, BTW, and I'm not a troll. I don't live outside the beltway. I have two degrees from HYP schools. I did meet my husband at the HYP where I received my advanced degree. He is of normal weight and in IMHO quite handsome. We're still very much in love. I have many friends -- some professional, some SAHMs -- outside the private school my DC attends. I'm generally a pretty happy person.

Thanks to all who offered kind advice and insights. This is not our first private school; we have two children in other privates. We have donated, volunteered, been active in classroom events. I notice other new moms in DC's class being welcomed in a way I have not. I'm a friendly, outgoing person, so I've been puzzled more than anything else. It's true that everyone has more in common with some people than others. However, at the other two schools, the communities seemed more welcoming and open.

The one mom who has been friendly (and is overweight herself) has been at the school for a while, and I notice she is treated in a similar way. She's a lovely person with a great sense of humor. The other moms are polite to her, but she's also not included in the mom get-togethers, and her child also seems to have few play dates. That's what made me begin to wonder if weight/appearances might be a factor. I also noticed that some of same moms who are polite and distant with me have little difficulty chatting up my husband! He commented on that himself, wondering why a couple of women he's seen be almost rude to me were very friendly with him.

One caveat is that I don't know many moms outside DC's classroom, so perhaps what I perceive to be cliquishness is particular to a small group of moms.

I appreciate the advice to focus on DC's happiness. Of course we plan to, but I do wonder whether the fact that DC has fewer play dates than DC's siblings will bother DC after a while. So far, it's not been noticed. We plan on staying at the school for now and seeing how the social situation evolves for DC.

There are definitely 100% pockets of this behavior in DC. Not in every school or in every grade or class in every school. But it exists.
We were in a preschool like this---other moms would look through me like I didn't exist despite being introduced to me 10 times. I'd smile and say hello and get nothing in return and yet our 3 year olds played together happily for 4 hours a day. Meanwhile
the other moms were air-kissing and fawning all over each other.

We left that school and have never experienced that culture again. I have friends at that school and they've had mixed experiences---some classes are great, others have more of that toxic snobbery.
We've since moved on to several other school (preschool and elementary--I have 3 kids) and have never experienced it again. We've met life long friends at our current elementary--families we vacation with, spend holidays with etc.

Those who are saying that this stuff doesn't exist in the DC private preschool/elementary school world are just wrong and mean themselves. It would be quite possible to never encounter it (by luck of who is in your school or your child's class) but it does happen.

Well, thanks for proving my point, OP. So if you are such a happy and content person why on earth did you feel the need to start this thread. Honestly, I think this is all in your head. If you were to pass me at DC's school in the hallway, from what you have written at least, you would assume that because I am physically fit and blonde , that I am shallow because I have never sought you out as a friend.

Meanwhile , I work two jobs, am a single parent and most times if I am not talking to someone I am trying to figure out how to get my retaining wall fixed, what kind of new furnace I need to buy, how can i get my groceries AND make it to the bank AND get DC home to study for two tests tomorrow.

Truly, truly I am not passing you by with only a casual smile or " superficial hello" because you are over weight. It is simply because I am BUSY and pre-occupied and I assure NOT thinking at all about my blonde hair, whcih I was born with or my figure which I am genetically disposed to have without much effort.

Is it my fault you seem to deeply resent me when you don't even know me just based on my physical appearance and the fact that I have not sought out your friendship.

Get a grip !

Who goes to the bank anymore, are you grey not blonde?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So one of my kids started at a new school this year. We've had kids at other privates, and the communities have been different but generally friendly.

This school is different in another way. Moms who are at home with their kids wear high heels, full make-up, and designer clothes to drop off their children. Not that there's anything wrong with any of these things, but the prevalence of moms like this is new in my experience.

The other thing about this school is that it's been very hard to break the ice and get to know other moms. Even my DH, who is usually oblivious, commented that people seem rather cliquish. Our repeated overtures for play dates and get-togethers have been rebuffed. We are down-to-earth people who generally don't care much about material things. We're not wealthy, but we're comfortable and paying private school tuition is not a challenge. We're both outgoing and have lots of friends from other contexts.

This may sound like a dumb question, but it is a genuine one. I'm wondering if some of the social ostracism has to do with the fact that I'm fat and not very trendy? While I'm not slovenly, I'm not the kind of do drop-off in heels. I'm also about 60 lbs overweight. Could it be real that in this particular elite school, someone's weight and the clothes she wears could be a factor in forming friendships? I haven't experienced this since high school, and it kind of blows my mind. What made me begin to wonder about this is that the only mom who has been open and friendly is also overweight. I noticed that she is also not "included" by the other moms.

Has anyone else experienced this?

If you were in an environment where people were judged on the size of their bodies, rather than the content of their character, would you stay if your child was happy? DC has had a great experience inside the classroom, loves the teachers, and is very happy there.

I have obviously never seen you, so let me say this: regardless of your body, the content of your character sounds very entitled, arrogant and a bit bitchy

Totally disagree with this PP. You sound nice, OP. I'd be your friend, but my kid's at public school. All the moms, including me, dress like crap!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP if you are correct about these people, that they are basically old mean girls, why would you want to send your kid to a school where he's likely going to absorb the values of people like this?

This is my question as well. If you deacribe - in your opinion - the majority of the parents, do you really think that their children are going to be well-rounded and kind people if the parents are what you say they are? Or do you not care about the character of your child's schoolmates?

Like an earlier poster, this is why we are going public. Of course all kinds exist everywhere, but I grew up in the DC private school society and frankly it is not what I want for my children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread may quickly join Hottest Topics - Last 30 Days.

Probably getting close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm so sorry that your child and you are experiencing this. At my son's private school, I experienced this myself. It was quite hurtful because my son wanted to play with his friends outside of school. For me, it was just blatant racism, I believe. I'm African American. I'm a kind, friendly person, and the children in my son's class love me. I guess they do because I volunteer a lot. Anyway, things changed when a Jewish couple came to the school and started inviting our son for play dates. So, our family and two other families get together about once a month, and it's positive for the children and the adults.

People who have not experienced this type of alienation may not notice or understand. I hope those who exclude others will think about the example they are setting for their own children. It can start them on a path of becoming mean-spirited human beings.

OP, hang in there. If things don't improve this year, start thinking of better school communities for your DC and you.

Good luck!

Not OP, but thank you for posting this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, you can dis the skinny moms after their husbands divorce them and they lose their social standing.

Do the divorced SAHMs who lose their social standing take their lunch boxes and sit on park benches like laid off Japanese workers?

I really think this post was started by a troll and the above comment if proof of the baitig going on here.

A few reality checks:

1) Washington DC has one of the highest rates of higher educational degrees per capita ( masters, PhD ) Not too many SAHM in my DC's Big 3, but conversely, we sure do have a lot of women who are Harvard law and full partner at top draw international law firms, serve in POTUS' cabinet, or perhaps just your average surgeon, journalist , etc.. Some of these women might also be very athletic and , as a result , be in great shape. They might also be beautiful, but that is not their doing, is it.

2) VERY few women I know in this town derive their social standing from their husbands. In fact, I can't count one . Actually, most couples I know they met at law school . As a matter of fact, no fewer than 6 parents out of 70 some at DC private met at Harvard Law school ( where both were attending law school)

So, my guess is the troll lives outside the Beltway , has no professional women friends and is very unhappy

Based on your writing ability one can infer that you were not one of the individuals who met their spouse at Harvard Law School.

True. My spelling and grammar are deficient. Guess what, by all metrics I am pretty successful . Most importantly, my DC is happy and healthy and doing very well in school.

Oh, and I am also blonde and athletic. For the OP, that seems to be an offense in and of itself.

If you have poor written grammar and you are blonde , lets jump ALL OVER THAT in a rush to feel superior.

Meanwhile, our hair color is something we are born with , as is our physiology.

Were I to have married for money and be a house wife and trade on my looks , then you might have a fair criticism. However, you know nothing about what I do for a living, how I earn my income, or my relationship history.

To project onto anyone who is blonde and thin is just that , a projection . Its a projection of your own feelings of hostility towards yourself onto a target you resent.

I find it really surprising that a woman or man who is reasonably successful and who has attained middle age would even CARE about who is pretty or not any more.

F+ck it , we are all 40's and 50's anyway . WHO CARES

Me thinks this Big 3 mom is wrapped a bit tight.

[Anonymous]

I have also been at top public & private in DC (not suburbs) - my experience was that the parents at public school were way more judgey, cliquey, and overall a lot less friendly. M .... - at our DC public, I felt the same way you feel at private, and I am thin, well-dressed (but no high heels or heavy make up).

IF this is true, there can be only one DC Public School that fits this description. Possibly. Maybe. And it's the elementary school in Ward 3 that has uniformly high-income households, with the exception of a dozen or so condo/apartment dwellers inbounds.

You are pretty much wrong on all fronts, but nice try. Maybe you got the Ward right. My guess, based on your response, is that your kid either goes to or went to that DCPS. Your personality really shines through.

I live inbounds for Murch and my children attend/have attended Holton and Sidwell. With that out of the way, why don't you name the DCPS that your children attend(ed) that is, in your words, "way more judgey" than Sidwell, NCS/STA or Maret (or GDS, depending on how you count the --your word -- "top" few schools.)