Just turned 40 year old woman
5'11 240 pounds I hate myself. Please help. ![]() |
In your case, I would just fork over the money and join Noom or something like it (weight watchers with coaching might help too). Get the personalized coaching. Get the menus and meal planning ideas. Learn a little more about yourself and your eating triggers. Once you start and progress a little bit, you can reconsider if you can do it on your own. But right now, just take one step forward and make sure you have 3rd party accountability in some manner.
Good luck. It's hard but hating yourself isn't the answer to getting more out of life. You have to do something about it. |
If you can afford it, ask your doctor about trying Ozempic/Wegovy or Monjourno. There’s a slim chance your insurance will cover one of these. Once you’ve got one, you just have to see how bad your side effects are and whether or not you can manage them.
Also if you can afford it, two weeks at Mountain Trek will change your life. No medication involved. You will hike all day and eat amazing but very controlled food and get a ton of good education. Two weeks is long enough to really build momentum on the diet and exercise for when you get home. I know it’s probably impossible to make this happen but since you asked, it’s there. Of course you can white knuckle it for free and just eat a lot less for a long time. But I know how hard it can be, so if you want external help those are the best options. |
Controlling your food intake + exercise. Burn more calories than you take in. |
I got surgery. Five years ago. Lost 70 pounds. Have kept it off. Look great, feel great, no regrets. |
Keep in mind that you don’t have to go all-in, all at once, and keep to the same diet and exercise regime forever and ever. Start slow and mix it up to find what feels sustainable for you. Because — and this is key — you didn’t get here overnight. And the weight is not going to go away overnight. And once you lose it, it’s not going to stay off unless you maintain a different lifestyle than what got you to this place to begin with.
Soooo… start with incremental changes. Aim to cut out soda. Or drink more water. Or have 3 servings of fruits and vegetables each day. Or take a daily 10-minute walk. Little things, gradually strung together. Then find one or more activities you like doing, and do them on the regular. Prepare for all of this to take time, and to not be precisely linear. |
You can do this OP. Don't over complicate things, and be patient. DH started his journey in January, is down 35lbs. All he did was eat less and move more.
Most weight loss starts in the kitchen - so cut back on food consumption, eat clean simple foods. Also increase activity. This doesn't mean you start training for a marathon, just find an activity you like and start doing it every day. And don't discount the value of parking far away from your destination - i.e., bottom of the parking lot at the grocery store. Opposite end of the mall from the store you're trying to get to. You get the idea. |
Ozempic. Game changer for me. Down 17 lbs in 2.5 months. Eating way less but not hungry - I don’t really think about food much.
At your weight you may have other risk factors which will make it covered by insurance. Mine wasn’t covered even though I was pre-diabetic (that’s already come down to the normal range) but still worth paying out of pocket. |
I have a coworker that did this and the results are incredible. She looks like a completely different person a year out. I know this is an invasive option and maybe one you aren’t interested in, though. Otherwise it’s food and exercise and using whatever tools and programs work for you to stay consistent |
Very limited alcohol, desserts/sweets, carbs and processed foods.
Increase exercise, water, fresh vegetables and fruits. Lean protein is your friend. Come on, OP. You know this. It’s not that you don’t know this, it’s that you’re not doing it. And no one can change that but you. DCUM can’t help you with what goes in your mouth, or how often you go for a good walk and sweat a bit. |
What are you doing now? If you’re truly struggling, talk to a therapist (intuitive eating is terrific IMO and lifestyle-change oriented vs calories and quick loss w/o a maintenance plan) or your PCP. |
Have you ever been checked for PCOS? Many of the “conventional” weight loss mantras (oh, just put down the sandwich) may not work with your body chemistry. The idea that the only solution is to live on air while on a treadmill 20 hours a day is harmful. Your body isn’t processing something properly; the trick is to find out what it is. |
Half Size Me is a good podcast, youtube, and website resource for the small sustainable approaches recommended by 11:30 and 11:38 above. There are free and low-cost options.
Also, use Happy Scale or Libra to track your weight every day. Your brain will register 1-2 pound daily fluctuations as "this isn't working" and "go drastic" or "just quit," but when you seen the trend line or the average, you can see it's working. You can do it! |
As a long term weight loss maintainer, and someone aware of the research on people like me, I think you have to accept that you will have to count calories now and forever. It sucks. You probably hate to hear it. But there’s just not a practical way around it. |
For what it’s worth I thought intuitive eating was total crap. YMMV but I think there’s something really toxic about the idea that I just needed to “listen to my body” more or whatever after a lifetime of struggling with weight and blood sugar and losing and re-gaining weight time after time. Now that I’m on Ozempic and I actually feel fullness and hunger in “normal” patterns I’m even more angry about the idea that I was just not “listening” before. Everyone is different and it’s impossible to know what one person is feeling vs another, and right now medicine provides very little help in the way of assessing why some of us are responding to semaglutide so differently from others and what that means about obesity or whatever. I’m just throwing this out there so OP had another perspective. When something like “intuitive eating” doesn’t work for you it’s easy to feel like it’s your fault and I just don’t think it’s that simple. |