"Are You Working Yet?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My personal opinion - SAHMs have it easer than WOHMs. Especially the ones with just one child.

Now, they like to make it seem like they don't but inventing all these things they must "do".

I was home for almost 6 months and was bored to tears. So bored in fact, that I on occasion I would go up into my DD's room with the hopes she would stir from a nap so I could say "oh your awake! Great!" and have something to do. My house was never as clean, I never cooked so much, read so much or got so much done. And I am single mom (by choice).

Now, I could have signed up for tons of baby classes, joined moms groups and then spent all my time complaining "I am soooo busy!" but I actually found plenty of other stuff to do with my DD.

Now I work full time AND do all the tasks of SAHM. Really, its hard for me to muster alot of respect for someone who claims they can't find time to take a shower or do laundry when they are home day in and day out.

Replies to bold-face above:

1. Yep, your personal opinion! It's a free country, you're entitled to your opinion!

2. Bully for you that your child was so easy, it must feel great to have such wonderful genes! Ahem, an easy infant is one thing; two or three toddlers/older kids quite another.

3. Just don't get the bizarre antipathy you seem to feel toward taking classes and joining mom's groups, etc.--did someone talk down to you at Gymboree or something? (oh wait, no, you never went...); if women are taking classes and in groups, then they are indeed busy with child-rearing activities; why would that be "complaining" to point it out?

4. No sirree, you certainly don't, unless you are magic and are able to be in two places at once. Someone else whom you are paying is doing the SAHM job with your child while you are working.

5..It's hard for me to muster a lot of respect for someone who is so nasty and condescending toward other women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My personal opinion - SAHMs have it easer than WOHMs. Especially the ones with just one child.

Now, they like to make it seem like they don't but inventing all these things they must "do".

I was home for almost 6 months and was bored to tears. So bored in fact, that I on occasion I would go up into my DD's room with the hopes she would stir from a nap so I could say "oh your awake! Great!" and have something to do. My house was never as clean, I never cooked so much, read so much or got so much done. And I am single mom (by choice).

Now, I could have signed up for tons of baby classes, joined moms groups and then spent all my time complaining "I am soooo busy!" but I actually found plenty of other stuff to do with my DD.

Now I work full time AND do all the tasks of SAHM. Really, its hard for me to muster alot of respect for someone who claims they can't find time to take a shower or do laundry when they are home day in and day out.

Translation: No one would marry me because I am so rude and self-important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My personal opinion - SAHMs have it easer than WOHMs. Especially the ones with just one child.

Now, they like to make it seem like they don't but inventing all these things they must "do".

I was home for almost 6 months and was bored to tears. So bored in fact, that I on occasion I would go up into my DD's room with the hopes she would stir from a nap so I could say "oh your awake! Great!" and have something to do. My house was never as clean, I never cooked so much, read so much or got so much done. And I am single mom (by choice).

Now, I could have signed up for tons of baby classes, joined moms groups and then spent all my time complaining "I am soooo busy!" but I actually found plenty of other stuff to do with my DD.

Now I work full time AND do all the tasks of SAHM. Really, its hard for me to muster alot of respect for someone who claims they can't find time to take a shower or do laundry when they are home day in and day out.

Were you home with a 6 month old? Being home with a baby is much different than being home all day with one toddler. Wow, just because you are home all day does not mean there is all kinds of time available to get housework done. I still have a hard time showering if DH is not home. Who is supposed to watch the toddler, the dog? I'mnot sure I'm interested in a broken leg because he can climb out of the crib. I also do not enjoy lugging him up and down stairs while I clean. He is not at an age where he can entertain himself in a safe way. I commend you for being able to do it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess for the same reason that SAHMs think their jobs are so hard while nannies who have the same schedule have it easy. I am always amazed at how many SAHM friends I have will talk about how lazy nannies are and should have all this free time. Maybe they've bitten themselves in the butt because people without kids hear that and think, gee, what do they do all day?

I always wondered about that contrast between nannies and moms. The nannies make it seem so easy and don't complain about not getting anything done. Sure they complain about their employers, benefits, and raises, but hardly about the rigors of the job.

The answer to that is obvious: it's because the nannies aren't doing most of what a parent is, if the nannies I observe daily are any indication.

Or maybe the nannies have figured out how to mange the kids and how important it is to teach discipline and responsibility so they can actually get things done with the kids. Most of the working moms I know let their kids run wild and are stressed out all the time. You will see the same kid with the nanny and he's being so sweet and helpful. WMs need to figure out that throwing gifts at your kids and letting them get away with murder isn't an even exchange for spending real, quality time with your kid. Something many nannies and SAHMs have figured out a long time ago.

You are absolutely right. If a Mom has a job (outside of the home - easy, OP), she throws gifts at her kids and lets them get away with murder and run wild and spends no real, quality time with them. SAHMs of course, have disciplined, responsible kids with whom they spend 24/7.

Now...back to our regularly schedule program of REALITY.

You have got to be kidding me.

LOL! OP thinks that is hysterical

[Anonymous]

I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

[Anonymous]

4. No sirree, you certainly don't, unless you are magic and are able to be in two places at once. Someone else whom you are paying is doing the SAHM job with your child while you are working.

Not necessarily. I know many working moms who can not afford a housekeeper or a nanny. They and their husbands do the housework once the kids go to bed. I know some who mention doing laundry at midnight..... oddly they don't complain as much as some of the SAHMs in the neighborhood. The "me" time that many SAHMs get with an occasional sitter or chatting with each other while kids play at the park is non existent for these women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

Ah, yes, the straw man, always splendid! Last I recall, no one was saying the SAHM job "is the hardest job in the world." People were merely saying that it is in fact work, period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

Maternity leave is not the long haul, nor is taking occasional days off to be with your children.

Reflux is definitely no fun; nursing for merely two months, however, is hardly representative of the nursing time commitments for SAHMs who nurse for much longer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:4. No sirree, you certainly don't, unless you are magic and are able to be in two places at once. Someone else whom you are paying is doing the SAHM job with your child while you are working.

Not necessarily. I know many working moms who can not afford a housekeeper or a nanny. They and their husbands do the housework once the kids go to bed. I know some who mention doing laundry at midnight..... oddly they don't complain as much as some of the SAHMs in the neighborhood. The "me" time that many SAHMs get with an occasional sitter or chatting with each other while kids play at the park is non existent for these women.

Wow, would you believe it, SAHMs also frequently need to do laundry at midnight! The point was that someone else is being paid to watch her children while she works, so she is obviously not doing everything a the SAHM and more, as she claimed--quite simply, she is not taking care of her children while she works! (That's not a value judgment, just a statement of logic.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

You clearly don't understand it; on that point you are certainly correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

Maternity leave is not the long haul, nor is taking occasional days off to be with your children.

Reflux is definitely no fun; nursing for merely two months, however, is hardly representative of the nursing time commitments for SAHMs who nurse for much longer.

And directly nursing is hardly representative of the commitment required for pumping. This is getting ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I admit I don't think staying home is that hard. I took an extended maternity leave and it was wonderful. I had a preemie with reflux who nursed every two hours for 2 months so I didn't have unusually easy kids. I often take days with 2 young kids and it is busy but fun. I have never the understood the frazzled I can't take a shower or get a break comments from SAHMs once the kids are past the newborn stage. I don't view staying home as a vacation but I don't view it as work or as the SAHM claim the hardest job in the world. If SAHMs want to be considered as working professionals then perhaps some of them should approach it in a professional manner and get a grip.

Maternity leave is not the long haul, nor is taking occasional days off to be with your children.

Reflux is definitely no fun; nursing for merely two months, however, is hardly representative of the nursing time commitments for SAHMs who nurse for much longer.

And directly nursing is hardly representative of the commitment required for pumping. This is getting ridiculous.

Couldn't agree more! Bottom line, WOHM, SAHM, we all work hard. (Oh wait, it was some WOHMs who refuse to acknowledge that point that got us where we are in this thread right now, LOL...)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My personal opinion - SAHMs have it easer than WOHMs. Especially the ones with just one child.

Now, they like to make it seem like they don't but inventing all these things they must "do".

I was home for almost 6 months and was bored to tears. So bored in fact, that I on occasion I would go up into my DD's room with the hopes she would stir from a nap so I could say "oh your awake! Great!" and have something to do. My house was never as clean, I never cooked so much, read so much or got so much done. And I am single mom (by choice).

Now, I could have signed up for tons of baby classes, joined moms groups and then spent all my time complaining "I am soooo busy!" but I actually found plenty of other stuff to do with my DD.

Now I work full time AND do all the tasks of SAHM. Really, its hard for me to muster alot of respect for someone who claims they can't find time to take a shower or do laundry when they are home day in and day out.

Translation: No one would marry me because I am so rude and self-important.

LOL!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Translation: No one would marry me because I am so rude and self-important.

Translation: I didn't want to settle for Mr. he has a job and he's ok and the end up writting about what a loser my
husband is on Interent forums.

I can see my post touched a nerve for you. I read your other post also and no one gets that defensive for no reason. Sorry I am not about to jump on the SAHMs are the greatest ever! bandwagon. I just personally think they have it easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Translation: No one would marry me because I am so rude and self-important.

Translation: I didn't want to settle for Mr. he has a job and he's ok and the end up writting about what a loser my
husband is on Interent forums.

I can see my post touched a nerve for you. I read your other post also and no one gets that defensive for no reason. Sorry I am not about to jump on the SAHMs are the greatest ever! bandwagon. I just personally think they have it easier.

HA, I agree. I'm a working mom and you should hear how the guys I work with bitch about their sexless marriages (all the while trying to get into the receptionist pants).

To the original poster, just b/c you are married, does not mean that your husbands still wants to be. He might just not want to fork over the cash to get your out of his hair and finds satisfaction some place else. We see it all the time on the "off topic" forums and I have PLEANTY of friends in miserable relationaships that would be better off divorced, but instead they will be raising screwed up kids with unhappy parents.