How long is too long for in-laws to stay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree. This is a major wife issue. She seems a little too close to her family for my tastes. You are the spouse and your needs come before her parents' desires.

I hope my sons never marry a woman like you.

Will you one day demand they buy a more expensive home so you’ll always have a place to stay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, your communication style is a little passive aggressive based on this post. “I don’t necessarily have a problem” “this isn’t a problem per se” — obviously it’s a problem and that’s why you’re here!

What I was trying to say is that I am fine with a longer visit in concept. I just don’t want to keep doing it if it is going to result in huge fights all the time. Last time, we went to a restaurant together, and DW spent 10-15 minutes berating me in front of everyone about politics. It is not fun. Worse things happen privately. I don’t want to do it if that is going to continue.

[Anonymous]

Hi Op, Pls answer the outstanding question so we can better understand and help.

[Anonymous]

I’d assume Op is a troll if they can’t or won’t answer all those basic questions about the situation.

[Anonymous]

2-3 days but years ago we stopped letting family stay with us we have a one bedroom and people sleeping in the Dining room on a blow up mattress got real strange as we aged. Still in a one bedroom. No guests any more I don't miss it.

[Anonymous]

No I hate company

[Anonymous]

When kids were younger my parents and Ils used to visit us from overseas for several months and we loved it. I like my family and friends to visit us and stay with us. We have a large enough house (5 bedrooms) and a huge basement.

Sometimes, it is a full house but I feel blessed that I have loving and supportive relatives and friends. I am 60 now. The older generation is mostly gone or too feeble to travel. Now we go back all the time to spend time with them.

I am so shocked and appalled about how utterly selfish and cold people of this culture are. What went wrong?

Why are people so miserable when this country is so beautiful and full of resources?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No I hate company

This thread is a year old. OP is probably a troll. Why are you responding?

[Anonymous]

Your house is not a hotel. 3 days once per year max.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our hosting preferences are rooted in our upbringings. Someone who lived in joint extended family or often had relatives stay with them, sees extended hosting as a norm and is usually casual about it. Someone who grew up in a nuclear family and isn't used to guest staying with them for extended periods, would find it stressful and intrusive.

Neither type is good or bad, just have different comfort zones.

After 50 years of life and raising 2 children, I have seen both types of upbringing and what the result is. The first type is much much better based on my life experience and research and much better outcomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are her parents. They are family. Your house is their house. They should always be welcome to stay for as long as they’d like.

Definitely not! 3 days is long enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My in laws would stay 7-10 days every month, those hellish times I won't wish on anyone,
Gosh, I am so glad they are no longer in my life, our house was their vacation spot, lol

My in laws also don’t vacation. They only houseguest. Or stay home

[Anonymous]

If they travel by plane, they can opt to stay at a nearby hotel and you can get together as often as you wish. If your DW wants to host them 24/7, then I think 15 days is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:3 days.

+1. Maybe 5 if you REALLY like them.

Benjamin Franklin famously said that guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.

np I don't think you should follow Benjamin Franklin's advice..lol. He was good at giving it but, not taking his own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree. This is a major wife issue. She seems a little too close to her family for my tastes. You are the spouse and your needs come before her parents' desires.

I hope my sons never marry a woman like you.

Will you one day demand they buy a more expensive home so you’ll always have a place to stay?

Sonny boys already had that beaten in to him long before meeting you.

Lots of guilt for not living on the same block.