Obviously if that's true then no. But just ending a friendship over this is crazy. If the mom is struggling to get her child to be kind I wouldn't just end a friendship over this. I can't see someone just not caring about something like this. |
Quote directly from the teacher. “We are working on teaching *other girl* how to be kind” |
I guess it’s the way she’s looking back at the previous interactions now and saying oh clearly this other girl was lying purposely since now she’s done something really unacceptable. When the other girl told the teachers your daughter was being rude, well maybe she was! Does not give her the right to hurt your child at all, and as I said earlier the separation seems good. But the fact that she behaved inexcusably doesn’t mean every other thing she said was a lie. I don’t know if this even matters, I guess I don’t know what I’d be saying to my daughter about the separation but I’d focus on the physical harm. I would not say to my DD or the other mom now I am taking a totally different perspective on these other things that happened in the past. That’s all I was saying. |
I understand what you're saying. My take from the info OP has offered was not that she was assuming that the other kid was lying about her daughter but that based on what she heard from the teachers and talking with her daughter, she had reason to believe the other kid was lying about her child. It can be hard to find the truth in these situations when it is a she said/she said, but it sounds like the teachers believe the other kid was bullying OPs kid. Anyway, I guess the moral of the story is that we can all offer perspectives but ultimately, we weren't there and can pronounce hard and fast judgements. What bothers me is the PPs who automatically assume OP is wrong wrong wrong! And all OP ever asked for was some condolences about changes to her friendship with the mom! |
Yep DCUM does like to trash OP way too often. And it does stink to lose a friendship no matter what! |
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OP, you have an opportunity to stay friends with this other mom in a way that she probably does NOT have the opportunity to initiate. She might feel like you're angry with her for what her kid is doing and might think you don't want to spend time with her, but if that isn't true, then please reach out to her and let her know that you want to stay friends, and ask her to coffee!
I have been in a number of situations where I had to lose a really good mom friend because of a situation between our kids, and I would have LOVED for the other mom to have reached out and told me this, but I was in a position where it just wasn't quite appropriate for me to do so. |
Why do so many moms here put this shit in threads? OP didn’t tell the other mom nor the school that the nasty kid was ‘bullying.’ You all tell on yourselves so much — anything, ANYTHING, to deflect from the cruel behavior of your own little tater tots. Disgusting. OP did nothing wrong here at all. |
OP, that’s clear. There are so many facckked up mothers here who will write anything, accuse a poster of anything, to comfort themselves over the nastiness of their kids. I’m sorry that happened. Good on you for protecting your DD — you weren’t even involved in the school action. You owe no apologies to anyone, let alone the idiots here. |
Yup. I know a woman who teaches young kids and her own child is an absolute monster. “We’re working on empathy!” Not ‘working’ in an active way, mind you. |
| OP well here’s a follow up. We both went to a mutual birthday party. First of all so awkward the mom won’t look me in the eye. We spent the party avoiding each other. Second of all the bully jabbed her fingers in my kids eye when I wasn’t looking. We had told our DD it was ok to play with her but to play with everyone. Not anymore. |
Did she know her kid was a bully? Now that she does know, what is she doing to change his behavior? If I had ever found out that any my children were bullying, I would be on my knees apologizing to child and parent and getting the help my family needs as I believe bullying is tied into family problems. Frankly, if I were you, I would be glad to have them out of my life and that my child was now safe. |
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Well I wrote her a text telling her her kid jabbed my kid in the eye, that maybe she needs some guidance, and that I still loved her and let’s get coffee in a few weeks.
She wrote back saying there’s always two sides of a story, that through her observations my kid was a crybaby, please don’t let my kid play with her kid, and that she has been so stressed. So I guess it’s really over. Whatever. |
Her child was being blued so why shouldn't she call it bullying Don't tell me a six year old cannot be a bully because they can and are. |
Yeah. His behaviors problem is that he is a bully! |
Yup and the behavior is only going to get worse so count yourself lucky. You tried. They did not. Rest easy. |