suspect DW is cheating - any value in getting PI to get proof?

[Anonymous]

no prenup

I earned millions per annum and we have 8 figure net worth. while she was 95% stay at home

2 young kids

if she is cheating I don't want her to have a nice pay day upon divorce. of course I expect minimum 50/50 child custody and will provide child support for my kids to have comparable lifestyle while with her but if she has cheated I don't want her to get any more than that.

any advice? experience?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:no prenup

I earned millions per annum and we have 8 figure net worth. while she was 95% stay at home

2 young kids

if she is cheating I don't want her to have a nice pay day upon divorce. of course I expect minimum 50/50 child custody and will provide child support for my kids to have comparable lifestyle while with her but if she has cheated I don't want her to get any more than that.

any advice? experience?

almost 15 yrs married. i never cheated, never abusive. after reading all the DCUM threads I guess like many 40yr old hot housewives of DC she just got bored of her long term partner

[Anonymous]

Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

[Anonymous]

Why do you think she is cheating? Covid has been hard for many people with small kids. Maybe she just needs to get out of the house some and it has nothing to do with cheating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you think she is cheating? Covid has been hard for many people with small kids. Maybe she just needs to get out of the house some and it has nothing to do with cheating?

many reasons for suspicion. i'd rather not list them all here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

[Anonymous]

Stick a gps on her car. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

is cheating a no fault divorce? if adultery is proven? hence my question..

[Anonymous]

She’s going to get her half or something close to it, even if she slept with the entire Washington Wizards. You can start making peace with it now, or you can lose half plus tens of thousands to a lawyer like me. Your choice.

[Anonymous]

It’s not worth it. It won’t help you at all except to let you know for sure you married a POS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

is cheating a no fault divorce? if adultery is proven? hence my question..

Op here .. would be nice if anyone in legal profession can chime in (we are in VA) .. of course I am also looking at getting legal advice but I feel like I need some answers now (weekend) and will only be torturing myself waiting till the weekday to talk to a laywer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:no prenup

I earned millions per annum and we have 8 figure net worth. while she was 95% stay at home

2 young kids

if she is cheating I don't want her to have a nice pay day upon divorce. of course I expect minimum 50/50 child custody and will provide child support for my kids to have comparable lifestyle while with her but if she has cheated I don't want her to get any more than that.

any advice? experience?

almost 15 yrs married. i never cheated, never abusive. after reading all the DCUM threads I guess like many 40yr old hot housewives of DC she just got bored of her long term partner

Nope, she hit the lottery when it comes to husbands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

is cheating a no fault divorce? if adultery is proven? hence my question..

Op here .. would be nice if anyone in legal profession can chime in (we are in VA) .. of course I am also looking at getting legal advice but I feel like I need some answers now (weekend) and will only be torturing myself waiting till the weekday to talk to a laywer

It won’t matter in VA. Try to have an amicable divorce and not give $$$$$$$ to a lawyer out of spite.