suspect DW is cheating - any value in getting PI to get proof?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you make that much per year and have not bothered to google - many law firms answer these questions in the faqs.

This.
Troll fail. Try somewhere else, OP.

I’m not a troll. But getting responses on dcum is always more fun than google. Btw someone did post a very helpful link which I probably could have found via google

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Slowly start moving money into a new account she can't find. And once enough money has been moved, start divorce proceedings.

This is terrible advice. Right now you have the high ground, and no matter what folks say about "the court doesn't care," individual judges kind of do. With the amount of money under discussion here, your STBX will absolutely hire someone to find hidden money, and the judge will hate that even more than her adultery. Keep the high ground, but move quickly and decisively.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.livesaymyers.com/adultery/

Thanks for being the only helpful response here. Most others seem to be biased at me being a man who has self respect to divorce a cheating wife. I will be contacting this lawyer for more advice.

I hope you’re actually reading what this said, OP. It sounds like your concern is marital assets more than alimony. As this lawyer points out, even if you meet the very high bar of proving adultery (pics of your wife and her trainer making out don’t meet that standard) you will still be losing half the marital assets.

Which I (helpfully) already said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you make that much per year and have not bothered to google - many law firms answer these questions in the faqs.

This.
Troll fail. Try somewhere else, OP.

I’m not a troll. But getting responses on dcum is always more fun than google. Btw someone did post a very helpful link which I probably could have found via google

So if you’re not a troll, you’re the most immature millionaire out there. If you think your spouse is cheating, you talk to them. You act like an adult and actually communicate. You don’t run to an anonymous forum to ask about private investigators. This is the mother of your children, and you’ve tried and convicted her of adultery because you suspect something.

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the only reason you want a divorce is that you think she is cheating? Makes sense that you would be sure of that before you discuss splitting up.

yes we have a good marriage, no major arguments, some sex, etc but if she has cheated, no matter what she says/does to repent there will only be a divorce from my end immediately. i just want to know if its worth getting PI to document any illicit affair .. or do courts not give a shit and split assets 50/50 anyway?

Courts don't care. No fault divorce. She's getting the money regardless, just like she would if you were the one cheating. Maybe spend your energy trying to figure out what's really going on rather than trying to cheat her out of money that is also rightfully hers. (hence the cheating being irrelevant)

is cheating a no fault divorce? if adultery is proven? hence my question..

The end result is the same.

If you prove adultery, the only difference is that your separation period is shorter. Your assets will be split the exact same way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you make that much per year and have not bothered to google - many law firms answer these questions in the faqs.

This.
Troll fail. Try somewhere else, OP.

I’m not a troll. But getting responses on dcum is always more fun than google. Btw someone did post a very helpful link which I probably could have found via google

So if you’re not a troll, you’re the most immature millionaire out there. If you think your spouse is cheating, you talk to them. You act like an adult and actually communicate. You don’t run to an anonymous forum to ask about private investigators. This is the mother of your children, and you’ve tried and convicted her of adultery because you suspect something.

Grow up.

No, actually, PP, if you think your spouse is cheating, the last thing you want to do is confront them before having evidence. Cheaters are liars. When they are confronted they will lie, deny, and gaslight.

I don’t know why OP suspects cheating, but if he has suspicions, he would be wise to look more deeply. OP, look at computer history, credit card purchases, the telephone bill and the numbers called look, at the gas mileage on the car, and put a GPS in the trunk. Something simple like a tile will tell you where the car goes. If you find evidence, then discuss with an attorney because evidence that you collect will not be admissible in court.

Keep your mouth shut and your eyes wide open.

[Anonymous]

You need to find out the three biggest name divorce lawyers in your area. You need to have meetings with all of them and explain the situation. That puts them in a conflict of interest situation if your wife tries to hire them. Worth the thousand or so you will be out to meet with people you don't end up using but screws her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to find out the three biggest name divorce lawyers in your area. You need to have meetings with all of them and explain the situation. That puts them in a conflict of interest situation if your wife tries to hire them. Worth the thousand or so you will be out to meet with people you don't end up using but screws her

This is a stupid tactic in a major metro area.

[Anonymous]

You aren’t even sure she cheated, yet you are going to meet with a lawyer?

Deep breath, Dave.

You’re jumping to conclusions and ruining your marriage (which you said is otherwise good).

Have you talked to her?

[Anonymous]

I’ll give real advice. You make enough to hire the best lawyer out there and, even though your assets will be split in half, with proof of infidelity you may have a shot at reduced to no alimony. Which, if you really do make that much per year, could be very significant. So don’t confront her, don’t change anything or let on you have suspicions. Keep on keeping on until you have a chance to talk to that lawyer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ll give real advice. You make enough to hire the best lawyer out there and, even though your assets will be split in half, with proof of infidelity you may have a shot at reduced to no alimony. Which, if you really do make that much per year, could be very significant. So don’t confront her, don’t change anything or let on you have suspicions. Keep on keeping on until you have a chance to talk to that lawyer.

“I think my wife might be cheating.”

Cha-ching!

Let’s hire a PI. Let’s have lots of calls and meetings. My retainer is $5k. I bill $650/hour.

And then you’ll find out you were wrong. Just paranoid. And your wife will think you’re crazy and evil.

Great plan!

[Anonymous]

It will absolutely help. You won't have to pay her alimony. You'll still need to pay child support though if she ends up with primary residence of the children.

[Anonymous]

I think you should hire a PI. Not because it’ll make a huge difference in your divorce (it probably won’t) but because you clearly need answers here. Do it for your own catharsis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It will absolutely help. You won't have to pay her alimony. You'll still need to pay child support though if she ends up with primary residence of the children.

Not true.

[Anonymous]

OP is a troll. Duh.