Parents of (partially) Asian kids - are you worried about anti-Asian bullying/harassment?
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Anonymous
| My husband is white American and I'm Asian; we are new to NOVA with 2 kids in MS. My husband is VERY worried that once in-person school starts, our half-Asian kids will face bullying and harassment. With all the anti-Asian hate crimes and violence in big cities, he worries that we'd be subjecting our children to this kind of "hate" at school. He thinks they should have a recording device (phone?) and we should have a lawyer on speed dial. I understand his concerns but part of me thinks he is being a bit paranoid. How are you, as (a) parent(s) of Asian child(ren), handling and digesting the current COVID-induced anti-Asian climate? How can we keep our children safe at school? Staying online/virtual has its own risks for their development, and we can't find a solution. Please help! |
Anonymous
Your husband IS paranoid. NoVa and MD have huge Asian populations and no one is 'hating' on Asians at school. Where did you come here from, Alabama? |
Anonymous
| Since your new to nova, most schools have very sizable Asian populations. I believe some are majority Asian. Your kids will fit in. |
Anonymous
| Yeah - pretty much not a problem in FCPS, especially in a majority of the schools in areas like McLean, Vienna, Reston, etc.. Very high Asian populations. I'm sure there is some bullying of different types in all schools, but not specifically targeted at Asians. Of course, there will always be a few exceptions to the rule. |
Anonymous
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Also welcome to the area and the DCUM. One of the most unhelpful forums out there.
Good luck to your family. Your kids will be fine! I’m so sorry this is something you have to worry about. |
Anonymous
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So parents are not worried at all, because there are many Asian students? But there were issues in NY, where I'm sure there are a lot of Asian students?
And yes, we moved from a "deep south" red state... |
Anonymous
Like PP said, there are some exceptions of course. DC is in a McLean elementary that feeds into the McLean HS. I do notice that certain groups of white kids do not mix with Asian kids. We all know who they are especially during younger elementary years, K-3. You never see Asian kids at their birthday parties and group play dates. My child used to tell me that at recess they sometimes hear white kids call Asian children names like, “Chinese are dumb, Viet-dumb..” if found out, they get sent to the principal’s office. There seems to be a regular pattern like this. |
Anonymous
My Asian parents moved me from Texas, to upstate New York to here This place is so much better. It will be night and day for your kids. They actually teach about the racist effects on emotion in elementary school. My half white half Asian kid was talking to me about how racism is awful and unfair. She is in fifth grade- and was articulating things that honestly, I don’t recall talking about in ES. The one thing you can do for you kids is sports or extracurriculars. It will help a lot for socialization. |
Anonymous
| We’re going to tell our kids to speak up and tell us or someone at school if something happens, and we will be sure to hold that person accountable (don’t sweep it under the rug or tell your kid to ignore it). That’s the only way to address racism and bullying, have to expose it. I am hopeful FCPS will handle these situations appropriately. |
Anonymous
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We are not. At all. Our area is pretty diverse. I feel like they are safer because of this. I’m not worried, and DH is even less so, if that’s possible. Neither are the kids.
Older kid (teen) is far more focused on representation in movies, shows, and books than personal safety in the area. We did talk about the attacks, and have had discussions about bullying in general since starting school, and asked them to tell us if anything does happen. |
Anonymous
There is a REALLY big Asian population. DS is white and most of his friends are Asian. There is a lot of diversity within his friend group as well since kids are from all over the world and some are Asian decent and American. He’s always has this same core group of friends because of common interests. This area drives me nuts for many reasons but there really is diversity and I have not seen the type of bullying your DH is worried about at all. |
Anonymous
| My kids are part Asian and the only race-based bullying any of them encountered in school was from Asian kids who claimed for various reasons they couldn’t really be part Asian. |
Anonymous
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I have 2 half Asian kids, one in 8th grade. You have to start talking to them now about their heritage. The bullying is not extreme, I'm not an alarmist, but I will be realistic and tell you it has gotten worse since Covid. Also, it was there before. For instance:
Lower ES: Your face looks funny, what are you? Upper ES: Your people want to bomb us. (This is where teaching heritage came in, DS apparently rolled his eyes and said, "I'm South Korean you idiot") Middle School: Mom, Asian kids are getting bullied in the hallways, even if they aren't Chinese. Kids are saying they are killing their families. Middle School: I'm so glad I only look half-Asian and can pass for white if kids don't know my name (I'm mom and white), then I won't get bullied. (This is the one that literally broke my heart to hear) So like I said above, not extreme, but not benign either. Prep your kids to understand what may happen as age appropriately as you can. |
Anonymous
| My daughter is Asian. I never really worried about it until Covid. But, even now, it's a small worry, not one that keeps me up or changes the way I do anything. It just makes me listen more carefully to the things she talks about. |
Anonymous
| It definitely goes on. My daughter attends Justice High School and she tells me when she goes by the ESOL classes they always call her chino girl (were Vietnamese). She's made it known but the teachers don't do anything. Were told in their culture they just call Asians Chinos. |