Started seeing this new guy. Overhead him on the phone say “I don’t hate her. It’s not like that”?

[Anonymous]

If I were described by someone I was dating as “I don’t hate her”...sounds like things are over OP. I would tell him not to bother to come by

[Anonymous]

That doesn’t sound good, OP. Don’t waste your time on this guy.

[Anonymous]

As I said OP, guys won’t mince words and own up to their shit, not play games. He said “I don’t hate her” as a response to how he feels about you. Decide how that makes you feel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That doesn’t sound good, OP. Don’t waste your time on this guy.

You’re making this a big deal. He’s clearly minimizing his feelings, so he does really like OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That doesn’t sound good, OP. Don’t waste your time on this guy.

You’re making this a big deal. He’s clearly minimizing his feelings, so he does really like OP.

What? There’s no good reason for someone to minimize their feelings except when they don’t exist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That doesn’t sound good, OP. Don’t waste your time on this guy.

You’re making this a big deal. He’s clearly minimizing his feelings, so he does really like OP.

What? There’s no good reason for someone to minimize their feelings except when they don’t exist.

Guys minimize their feelings to their guy friends all the time as to not appear “whipped”. It happens all the time.

[Anonymous]

I’m the line person who thinks that phone call doesn’t mean much. OP don’t jump to conclusions. If he has kids he still had to talk to ex. Or if divorce not final. Or many other reasons.

[Anonymous]

I don’t hate her sounds like he’s just not that into you. If he cant tell an ex that he has feelings for you, he is obviously harborering something for her since he answered the phone and felt the need to blow off your relationship (whatever it is).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the line person who thinks that phone call doesn’t mean much. OP don’t jump to conclusions. If he has kids he still had to talk to ex. Or if divorce not final. Or many other reasons.

They don’t have kids. No property. Nothing. I asked him why she felt so comfortable calling him to discuss this and he said it’s probably because they talked last month. I said, okay sooo? He said he saw her on a date while out and texted her and they ended up talking that day.

[Anonymous]

This doesn’t sound like a promising situation OP. There are other fish in the sea.

[Anonymous]

Dump him.

Even if he's just trying to spare her feelings, guys like that - who lack boundaries with other women - ain't worth sh!t.

I dated a guy who did the same sort of thing with his ex. Zero boundaries because of her "mental health issues". While nothing happened with her (at least while we were together, they hooked up after I dumped him) he would regularly message women inappropriately and didn't think there was a problem with it because "his intentions were with me" or some BS.

Bottom line, there's so many good men out there, don't waste your time on dudes like this.

[Anonymous]

If he's honest, then he's just still hung up on his ex (or he would not have picked up the phone to begin with).

If he's dishonest (more than likely IMO), then he's using you to get under his ex's skin.

As about a dozen people have already said, he shouldn't have picked up his phone from her. The fact that he did is enough, regardless of the topic. But then on top of that, the topic was YOU. Move on, there's someone ne else out there who's actually emotionally available.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the line person who thinks that phone call doesn’t mean much. OP don’t jump to conclusions. If he has kids he still had to talk to ex. Or if divorce not final. Or many other reasons.

They don’t have kids. No property. Nothing. I asked him why she felt so comfortable calling him to discuss this and he said it’s probably because they talked last month. I said, okay sooo? He said he saw her on a date while out and texted her and they ended up talking that day.

Talking here means someone a lot more involved than talking. They had sex and he's reminded that he's not over her yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That doesn’t sound good, OP. Don’t waste your time on this guy.

You’re making this a big deal. He’s clearly minimizing his feelings, so he does really like OP.

I don’t think so. If he really likes OP, why did he answer his phone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he's honest, then he's just still hung up on his ex (or he would not have picked up the phone to begin with).

If he's dishonest (more than likely IMO), then he's using you to get under his ex's skin.

As about a dozen people have already said, he shouldn't have picked up his phone from her. The fact that he did is enough, regardless of the topic. But then on top of that, the topic was YOU. Move on, there's someone ne else out there who's actually emotionally available.

If he’s dishonest then would he be dishonest with the ex about he feels about OP by minimizing?