What makes a guy "creepy?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:chris coons' daughter - damn, i feel bad for her.

Me too. Nasty old man.

coons came out and said in public that biden wasn't being creepy.

i wonder if his daughter was pissed at home at daddy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lack of boundaries.

If I haven't done something to indicate I want to talk to you, don't unless it's to be courteous or convey necessary information.

Example, on metro.

non-creepy-- your backpack is open and something looks like it will fall out.

creepy-- smile! So, I notice you like the beach, me too (pointing at OBX T-shirt).

Example, in Starbucks

non-creepy-- Looks like they forgot both of our orders. I'm going to check.

creepy-- sit down at my table or ask to do so, unless there are no others and I'm at a big table and it's clear you just want to work.

Example, on the street

creepy-- anything other than "miss, your hair is on fire."

example, at work

non-creepy-- did you have a nice weekend?

creepy-- asking for a date; staring; looming over my desk.

example, Facebook.

non-creepy-- sending friend request if you are a friend of a friend and you often reply to the same friend's postings and "like" one another's comments. If I don't accept the friend request, you drop it.

creepy-- private messaging me to ask about the friend request, trying to talk to me once I've said no, expressing anger and telling me what kind of person I am if I decide not to interact with you.

you crazy, and if the guy was attractive it wouldn't be creepy to you!

Not true. I am a different poster and attractiveness really doesnt matter. Plenty of "attractive" guys are super creepy. It's this inane persecutionist fantasy men have that they can act creepy as hell and when they get called out they can cry that "I guess I'm just not attractive enough to get away with it."

Bitch, please.

I think its ignorant to say your level of attraction to the guy doesn't impact how you initially perceive his creep factor. If a super hot guy approaches you and starts yammering about something stupid you're much more likely to be flattered and engage than if a guy who looks like he lives in his mom's basement and eats pizza for a living approaches you with the same stupid line. Now maybe the super hot guy IS a creep and five minutes into the conversation you realize that and pull away but the reality is that the hot guy gets five minutes the not guy never had a chance at.

That has nothing to do with fantasy. That is reality. And perhaps brings a secondary thing up, in that a guy's physical appearance (not like, hot/not but like, put together, hygenic, not slovenly) has a pretty significant impact on the creep alarm sounding. For example, if you have two guys who are equally creepy and equally attractive but one is in a suit and one is in dirty clothes and looks like he hasn't showered, I would be more likely to write the dirty guy off as creepy first.

"Lives in his basement and eats pizza for a living" is not a measure of attractiveness. That is a personality trait, not a physical characteristic. There's plenty of hot guys that can live in the basement and eat pizza for a living and plenty of ugly guys. Neither of their "creepiness" is determined by how attractive they are, nor by the fact that they live in a basement, though that certainly seems to increase the likelihood.

Maybe there is a correlation between ugly guys and creepiness because attractive people, in general, have been treated better over the course of their life, probably been exposed to more interaction, and will, in general, have better social skills. But then again, there are plenty of dudes like Elliot Rodgers, who was a perfectly attractive guy, definitely more the type to "wear a suit" like you described, instead of a dirty clothes, and drove a BMW. And he still went off the charts on every woman's creep meter.

So no- your assessment is fully incorrect. A creep is a creep is a creep whether they're attractive or even hot, dressed in the nicest clothes or the worst. As human beings we tend to trust those who are clean and take care of themselves more, and people who are attractive more. That goes for ALL human beings, male and female, and statistics back that up. However, that's totally different from classifying someone into the creep group. Any dude, regardless of appearance or background, can choose to respect a woman's social cues and emotions, read them appropriately, and not impose himself on here. And vice versa can happen- in which case, he gets placed into "creep category."

Look, the bottom line is that a really good looking man could do or say something that you might find flattering, where the exact same thing done or said by an unattractive guy would be perceived as creepy.

No one is saying that good looking guys can't be creepy, but there is a sliding scale of creepiness and good looking men will have more leeway than their less attractive brothers. Fact.

This is 100% true.

[Anonymous]

I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

[Anonymous]

It's like porn. You know it when you see it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's like porn. You know it when you see it.

Really? So why is it that the definition of porn is left to each community set the standard as to what is porn and what isn't?

What you determine is not what another does. I wrote a post that's on page 6 that begins, "Aside from pushy," that talks about that and yes I am a man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's like porn. You know it when you see it.

Really? So why is it that the definition of porn is left to each community set the standard as to what is porn and what isn't?

What you determine is not what another does. I wrote a post that's on page 6 that begins, "Aside from pushy," that talks about that and yes I am a man.

Famous quote by SCOTUS justice Potter Stewart--

I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description ["hard-core pornography"], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

Obviously someone crowding your space is creepy. I think the definition of creepy to a lot of women doesn't start when someone is physically in your space but way before that. But the women who are so vehemently arguing that attractive people don't get more leeway are just completely ignoring the real world. Frankly you sound like one of the people who thinks most guys you encounter are creepy and I usually think for that type the problem is with you.

-a chick, not a 'dude bro'

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^And what I'm telling you is THAT IS NOT TRUE, at least in any meaningful way.

Beyond the slight edge given to ALL attractive people regardless of rape, there is no extra, specific advantage given to attractive men in terms of whether or not they are creepy.

WOmen are fairly good at telling at once whether someone is "creepy". If a man is extremely socially skilled and manages to be a serial killer while flying under the radar, then, by definition of the social perception aspect required for creepy status, he is not creepy. Evil and awful, yes- but not creepy.

You seem to be hung up and upset over the social disadvantages that ugly people (men specifically) face in general. That's fine, and there's room for a thread on that. You are certainly welcome to be passionate on the issue (though it obviously seems that you are a bit overly invested in it, for reasons which we can only guess...), but it's just not relevant in the creepy said.

For the last time: looks do not determine or significantly contribute to someone's classification as "creepy". That has to do with social skills, respect of female boundaries, and awareness of social cues. Those are the determinants.

NP, woman, who thinks if you look up you will see the point flying over your head. Stop trying to tell other people what is allegedly not true for them.

[Anonymous]

I think the "good looking people don't get any leeway whatsoever" crowd desperately wants the creepy / not creepy continuum to be a simple, unmistakable binary so that predators and misogynists can't claim confusion to plausibly deny their overbearing actions.

But the fact is that the world is more complicated than that, women are individuals who have varied preferences, and men of good will can transgress one woman's preferences while acting in a way that would be acceptable to another woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's like porn. You know it when you see it.

Really? So why is it that the definition of porn is left to each community set the standard as to what is porn and what isn't?

What you determine is not what another does. I wrote a post that's on page 6 that begins, "Aside from pushy," that talks about that and yes I am a man.

Famous quote by SCOTUS justice Potter Stewart--

I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description ["hard-core pornography"], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that.

Wow, went all the way back to 1964. Doesn't change the stated fact I put forth. "Whether the average person, applying contemporary community standards, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest." Chicago might say an exhibition of nude women portraits from the masters if just fine while another city/town/community might see nudity in any form in a public display prurient.

Of course you have a right to set your own standard but as I mentioned in my post, your's doesn't match up with everyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

Exactly. I think it's just wishful thinking from dudes, hoping that they can explain away their creepiness by lamenting about "poor me, girls find me ugly! Don't think I'm a weird, entitled asshole- feel sorry for me because I'm being discriminated against for being ugly!"

It's a bunch of bullshit. But no matter how many times women continue to reiterate that creepiness has nothing to do with looks, men (and gullible women) will continue to use it as an excuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:chris coons' daughter - damn, i feel bad for her.

Me too. Nasty old man.

coons came out and said in public that biden wasn't being creepy.

i wonder if his daughter was pissed at home at daddy.

Probably, cause he clearly was being creepy and a blind person can see the girl's discomfort

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

Exactly. I think it's just wishful thinking from dudes, hoping that they can explain away their creepiness by lamenting about "poor me, girls find me ugly! Don't think I'm a weird, entitled asshole- feel sorry for me because I'm being discriminated against for being ugly!"

It's a bunch of bullshit. But no matter how many times women continue to reiterate that creepiness has nothing to do with looks, men (and gullible women) will continue to use it as an excuse.

Yeah except how numerous women have disagreed with you but whatever, keep believing that you speaking for all female experiences is feminism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

Exactly. I think it's just wishful thinking from dudes, hoping that they can explain away their creepiness by lamenting about "poor me, girls find me ugly! Don't think I'm a weird, entitled asshole- feel sorry for me because I'm being discriminated against for being ugly!"

It's a bunch of bullshit. But no matter how many times women continue to reiterate that creepiness has nothing to do with looks, men (and gullible women) will continue to use it as an excuse.

Yeah except how numerous women have disagreed with you but whatever, keep believing that you speaking for all female experiences is feminism.

"Women." There's a lot of bros that like to gaslight on DCUM... js...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wrote the examples list. To whoever posted the run-on sentence saying I'd welcome this behavior from a hot enough guy: nope.

Anyone who doesn't respect boundaries is creepy. Anyone. A physically-appealing person (I won't say attractive, because creepy behavior is repellent) crowding your space and disrespecting my privacy is off-putting because (a) people who are classically good-looking are often used to getting what they want, which can translate to being less good at taking no for an answer; and (b) if you could clearly succeed with women using normal means but are still skulking around me, you're either a 24/7 player or so completely creepy that when people get to know you they flee.

If that was hard to follow, I'll let a dude-bro explain it to you.

Exactly. I think it's just wishful thinking from dudes, hoping that they can explain away their creepiness by lamenting about "poor me, girls find me ugly! Don't think I'm a weird, entitled asshole- feel sorry for me because I'm being discriminated against for being ugly!"

It's a bunch of bullshit. But no matter how many times women continue to reiterate that creepiness has nothing to do with looks, men (and gullible women) will continue to use it as an excuse.

Yeah except how numerous women have disagreed with you but whatever, keep believing that you speaking for all female experiences is feminism.

"Women." There's a lot of bros that like to gaslight on DCUM... js...

Your view isn't the only one in the world, nor is it the last word on creepiness, or anything else. Try to deal with that.