10yo embarrased by hairy legs and wants to shave. i am at a loss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

My 10 y.o. daughter recently got her first huge zit. She was mortified, so I showed her how to put a tiny dab of concealer on it. Immediately, her entire demeanor changed as she realized this wasn't the end of the world. Did she have a full face of makeup? Nope, just a tiny bit, right on the zit. I see nothing wrong with making appropriate adjustments throughout childhood, as needed. I would hate to be so rigid in my standards that I couldn't even compromise on certain issues that are bound to come up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

My 10 y.o. daughter recently got her first huge zit. She was mortified, so I showed her how to put a tiny dab of concealer on it. Immediately, her entire demeanor changed as she realized this wasn't the end of the world. Did she have a full face of makeup? Nope, just a tiny bit, right on the zit. I see nothing wrong with making appropriate adjustments throughout childhood, as needed. I would hate to be so rigid in my standards that I couldn't even compromise on certain issues that are bound to come up.

I think putting concealer on a 10yr old is terrible. I think it is the moms who have the issues, not the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

Dd was in 6th grade when she was 10. We allowed her to wear lip gloss when she asked permission, which was standard among her 6th grade peers. Because we didn't make a big deal out of it, the novelty quickly wore off and she rarely wears it. At Christmas during 7th grade, I asked if she wanted any make up (a lot of her friends are wearing a little make up now) and she said no thanks. I told her to let me know if she changes her mind.

My 9yo has been asking about make up to cover a small scar on her nose from a toddler accident she had. We've played with a few alternatives but have decided together that make up makes it more noticeable, so she stopped asking and has decided it's not a big deal anymore. I told her at some point along the way that we could ask her doctor if she has any recommendations. That led to a plastic surgery discussion. I think she has a healthy attitude about it because her take was basically, most people don't need it but if it helps them feel better about themselves, why not. Some people do need it and they should definitely be allowed to have it (accident victims was her example there). She said she wouldn't ever want to change herself surgically because she likes how she looks.

No one needs more than soap. No one needs long hair, or pretty clothes, or make up, or smooth legs. Most of us do these things because they make us feel better about ourselves. Kids like to feel good about their appearance too. I just think it's too controlling to make a kid deal with teasing for something that can be fixed by shaving, which is noninvasive and non permanent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my house the decision would be her body, her choice. But I would recommend Nair or waxing.

In mine too, but only after I was sure she understood the societal dynamics that makes shaving a desirable behavior for women, and after I was sure she didn't prefer me to deal with the people who should put a stop to the teasing and the persona comments from her peers.

Also, the shaving would happen in a way that's consistent with our family values - frugally, cruelty-free products only, at home, not at a salon.

Ok, eyeroller, since I'm the poster you're snarking at, honest questions for you:

do decisions happen in a vacuum in your family?

Do house rules go out of the window when a child of yours wants to do something s/he hadn't been doing before?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

Dd was in 6th grade when she was 10. We allowed her to wear lip gloss when she asked permission, which was standard among her 6th grade peers. Because we didn't make a big deal out of it, the novelty quickly wore off and she rarely wears it. At Christmas during 7th grade, I asked if she wanted any make up (a lot of her friends are wearing a little make up now) and she said no thanks. I told her to let me know if she changes her mind.

My 9yo has been asking about make up to cover a small scar on her nose from a toddler accident she had. We've played with a few alternatives but have decided together that make up makes it more noticeable, so she stopped asking and has decided it's not a big deal anymore. I told her at some point along the way that we could ask her doctor if she has any recommendations. That led to a plastic surgery discussion. I think she has a healthy attitude about it because her take was basically, most people don't need it but if it helps them feel better about themselves, why not. Some people do need it and they should definitely be allowed to have it (accident victims was her example there). She said she wouldn't ever want to change herself surgically because she likes how she looks.

No one needs more than soap. No one needs long hair, or pretty clothes, or make up, or smooth legs. Most of us do these things because they make us feel better about ourselves. Kids like to feel good about their appearance too. I just think it's too controlling to make a kid deal with teasing for something that can be fixed by shaving, which is noninvasive and non permanent.

These are not the only two possible ways to deal with the problem.

The first recourse should always be harsh, uncompromising intervention against the teasing.

[Anonymous]

Wax that sh1t off.

[Anonymous]

DD has olive complexion and dark hair on her legs - generally she has a lot of hair. She will likely shave early too.

New razors are much easier and safer to use than the single blades ones from when I started shaving in the 1980s! I cut myself nearly every time I shaved.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, if she's adamant, I would steer her toward the waxing route, too. Lasts longer. The daily maintenance of leg shaving is a PITA and not something most 10 yo's want to do. In other words, sounds good in theory, fails in practice (for most).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

As a mother who was once a ten yr. old girl with dark, hairy legs, all I can say is it's appalling that some of you seem to not have any empathy for your own daughters. This isn't an issue of getting a nose job, for crying out loud. It's a simple matter of shaving the hair on her legs. I will be forever grateful to my own mom for seeing my distress at being teased and helping me shave my legs, rather than making me "stick it out for my own good". I would never do that to my child, if there was something as easily fixable as shaving legs. Good grief.

Ditto except my mom did make me stick it out. Apparently it was her hill to die on. Unfortunately, I didn't want it to be mine, at age 10-11. And I don't want it to be my daughters. What you do with your child is your choice. But the 10 year old in me begs you to consider your daughter's feelings above your own. I am assertive and strong woman. But feeling self conscious about something as stupid as leg hair (and very bushy eyebrows) at 10 years old sucked. It really and truly sucked, and it made me less confident in other areas. Instead of teaching me to feel strong, it made me want to be invisible. I got past that on my own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, if she's adamant, I would steer her toward the waxing route, too. Lasts longer. The daily maintenance of leg shaving is a PITA and not something most 10 yo's want to do. In other words, sounds good in theory, fails in practice (for most).

Most young girl's leg hair does not grow as fast as women's - my daughter uses an electric razor and shave 1x/week. 5 minutes - very easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

The child isn't asking to wear make up - the child is asking to shave. Most (all?) 10 year olds don't wear make-up. A decent number of 10 year old girls shave - especially those with darker/fuller leg hair.

A lot of 10 year old girls also: use deodorant, use zit cream and may use concealer on occasion. As the mother of a 10 year old with many different 10 year old girls running in and out of my house all the time, I can tell you this is true of many of them. Why? because many of them are entering puberty and so, their bodies, and the changes to them, are front and center in their minds. They notice a lot about their bodies - not because of society, but because their bodies are changing - some rapidly. So they start noticing them and them want help feeling better about them. It's my job as a mom to help with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

Dd was in 6th grade when she was 10. We allowed her to wear lip gloss when she asked permission, which was standard among her 6th grade peers. Because we didn't make a big deal out of it, the novelty quickly wore off and she rarely wears it. At Christmas during 7th grade, I asked if she wanted any make up (a lot of her friends are wearing a little make up now) and she said no thanks. I told her to let me know if she changes her mind.

My 9yo has been asking about make up to cover a small scar on her nose from a toddler accident she had. We've played with a few alternatives but have decided together that make up makes it more noticeable, so she stopped asking and has decided it's not a big deal anymore. I told her at some point along the way that we could ask her doctor if she has any recommendations. That led to a plastic surgery discussion. I think she has a healthy attitude about it because her take was basically, most people don't need it but if it helps them feel better about themselves, why not. Some people do need it and they should definitely be allowed to have it (accident victims was her example there). She said she wouldn't ever want to change herself surgically because she likes how she looks.

No one needs more than soap. No one needs long hair, or pretty clothes, or make up, or smooth legs. Most of us do these things because they make us feel better about ourselves. Kids like to feel good about their appearance too. I just think it's too controlling to make a kid deal with teasing for something that can be fixed by shaving, which is noninvasive and non permanent.

So you encouraged your child to wear make-up because some of her friends started? Why would a mom want their child to wear make-up. It is so young. What kind of message are we sending to these girls.

How is NOT dealing with the kids who are teasing the priority, especially over changing your appearance??

[Anonymous]

Where do you see that I encouraged her to wear make up?

She's in middle school. Middle school is when a lot of kids start wearing make up. I offered, she declined. It was a preemptive strike, if you will. I figured her friends were doing it so she would be asking soon. If I make a small make up allowance up front and teach her how to use it properly, maybe she wouldn't paint herself like a clown. I also didn't want her sharing with friends, so I offered to get her own.

Make up in middle school is an age appropriate rite of passage for many girls.

Also, teasing should e dealt with, but seeing how I'm not the teasing children's parent, I can only do so much. Even of the teacher addresses that, mean girls can find a way to tease. Adults can't, not should they, be supervising every conversation among children. If someone is teasing my child, I take appropriate actions to get the teasing to stop, but if what they're teasing about makes my child self conscious and we can make changes on our end too, we will do that if we're comfortable with that.

What if someone were teasing your son for wearing his sister's hand me downs? Would you make him continue to wear them and say the kids just shouldn't tease? Or would you consider that he might be self conscious about it and make sure he had clothes he felt comfortable and confident in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

Dd was in 6th grade when she was 10. We allowed her to wear lip gloss when she asked permission, which was standard among her 6th grade peers. Because we didn't make a big deal out of it, the novelty quickly wore off and she rarely wears it. At Christmas during 7th grade, I asked if she wanted any make up (a lot of her friends are wearing a little make up now) and she said no thanks. I told her to let me know if she changes her mind.

My 9yo has been asking about make up to cover a small scar on her nose from a toddler accident she had. We've played with a few alternatives but have decided together that make up makes it more noticeable, so she stopped asking and has decided it's not a big deal anymore. I told her at some point along the way that we could ask her doctor if she has any recommendations. That led to a plastic surgery discussion. I think she has a healthy attitude about it because her take was basically, most people don't need it but if it helps them feel better about themselves, why not. Some people do need it and they should definitely be allowed to have it (accident victims was her example there). She said she wouldn't ever want to change herself surgically because she likes how she looks.

No one needs more than soap. No one needs long hair, or pretty clothes, or make up, or smooth legs. Most of us do these things because they make us feel better about ourselves. Kids like to feel good about their appearance too. I just think it's too controlling to make a kid deal with teasing for something that can be fixed by shaving, which is noninvasive and non permanent.

How was she 10yrs old and in 6th grade?

And even if some middle schoolers wear make-up doesn't mean a 10yr old should. Be a parent, not a friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hygiene and grooming are two different things. I'd say this is a grooming issue on which people have divided views on whether grooming is expected or a matter of vanity. The answer is obviously informed by social, culturally, and personal values.

In some cultures it is crystal clear that removing leg hair is an essential grooming issue. In others, it would seem crazy. I'd say in the US far more people than not believe shaving is a basic of grooming. others think it is not, with some of the latter saying it's vanity. There isn't a right answer here, but clearly no one who thinks about this for more than a few minutes would come away with the view that it is a hygiene issue.

I agree and it is 100% vanity for 10yr olds. What if everyone makes fun of her nose, or her freckles, etc... You have to like yourself. If you teach your kids to change themselves every time someone says something, they will never be happy.

I don't understand responses like this. If she were 16 would you allow dd to shave? Do you shave? You're still changing your body to conform to societal standards, even though you're older. What's the lesson to be learned from being bullied for years until she reaches an arbitrary age, if you're planning on letting her do it eventually anyway?

It's not like driving, dating, drinking, enlisting in the military, etc, in which case being older allows for safer or wiser choices. I just don't understand making them wait. If a parent didn't believe in shaving for some moral or religious reasons, I'd get that more (not really understand, but I think I'd get that more than an arbitrary and inflexible age limit).

So do you let your 10yr old wear make-up because it makes her feel better? Kids think she is ugly and it makes her feel better. Would you let her? There is no difference. 10yr old is a CHILD. There is no reason a child should be doing anything but shampoo and soap.

Dd was in 6th grade when she was 10. We allowed her to wear lip gloss when she asked permission, which was standard among her 6th grade peers. Because we didn't make a big deal out of it, the novelty quickly wore off and she rarely wears it. At Christmas during 7th grade, I asked if she wanted any make up (a lot of her friends are wearing a little make up now) and she said no thanks. I told her to let me know if she changes her mind.

My 9yo has been asking about make up to cover a small scar on her nose from a toddler accident she had. We've played with a few alternatives but have decided together that make up makes it more noticeable, so she stopped asking and has decided it's not a big deal anymore. I told her at some point along the way that we could ask her doctor if she has any recommendations. That led to a plastic surgery discussion. I think she has a healthy attitude about it because her take was basically, most people don't need it but if it helps them feel better about themselves, why not. Some people do need it and they should definitely be allowed to have it (accident victims was her example there). She said she wouldn't ever want to change herself surgically because she likes how she looks.

No one needs more than soap. No one needs long hair, or pretty clothes, or make up, or smooth legs. Most of us do these things because they make us feel better about ourselves. Kids like to feel good about their appearance too. I just think it's too controlling to make a kid deal with teasing for something that can be fixed by shaving, which is noninvasive and non permanent.

How was she 10yrs old and in 6th grade?

And even if some middle schoolers wear make-up doesn't mean a 10yr old should. Be a parent, not a friend.

Because not every child fits neatly into the same little box you seem to want to put them into, and that's how the age-grade worked for our child. You're showing how rigid and unwilling to consider other options you are with your last post so I don't see any reason to continue this conversation.