When you are forced to let go of the dream you had for your child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a bunch of disgruntled shriveled up bitter people who didn't get into the school of their choice...wow the nastiness even for DCUM on this post is off the charts. SAD.

I'm a PP and I went to Princeton. It was fine but certainly not the end-all be-all. My DC is getting a much better education at a SLAC.

And I'm neither disgruntled, shriveled up -- I look pretty good for my age, actually -- or bitter. I just see a lot of sad things happening around me to kids whose parents are living out their dreams through them.

+1000. And believe me, I know because I'm a psychologist working at a university.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SOMEONE COME TO A COLLEGE FORUM AND THINK FOR A SPLIT MINUTE THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH A PHYSICALLY IMPAIRED CHILD? MAJOR DISCONNECT, THIS THREAD IS ODD VERY ODD. WHILE I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PARENTS OF A CHILD WHO CANNOT HEAR, THIS IS A RATHER RANDOM PLACE TO COME AND ASSUME THATS WHATS BEING DISCUSSED.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SOMEONE COME TO A COLLEGE FORUM AND THINK FOR A SPLIT MINUTE THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH A PHYSICALLY IMPAIRED CHILD? MAJOR DISCONNECT, THIS THREAD IS ODD VERY ODD. WHILE I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PARENTS OF A CHILD WHO CANNOT HEAR, THIS IS A RATHER RANDOM PLACE TO COME AND ASSUME THATS WHATS BEING DISCUSSED.

WTF? You think students with hearing impairment don't go to college? You think kids with physical impairments don't go to college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SOMEONE COME TO A COLLEGE FORUM AND THINK FOR A SPLIT MINUTE THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH A PHYSICALLY IMPAIRED CHILD? MAJOR DISCONNECT, THIS THREAD IS ODD VERY ODD. WHILE I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PARENTS OF A CHILD WHO CANNOT HEAR, THIS IS A RATHER RANDOM PLACE TO COME AND ASSUME THATS WHATS BEING DISCUSSED.

Lower caps are your friend. Stop shouting.

Also, for future reference, please read the other responses to your rant. You might learn something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SOMEONE COME TO A COLLEGE FORUM AND THINK FOR A SPLIT MINUTE THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH A PHYSICALLY IMPAIRED CHILD? MAJOR DISCONNECT, THIS THREAD IS ODD VERY ODD. WHILE I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PARENTS OF A CHILD WHO CANNOT HEAR, THIS IS A RATHER RANDOM PLACE TO COME AND ASSUME THATS WHATS BEING DISCUSSED.

Ugh. My earballs!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gee. My dream was that my child would be able to hear. She is not able to do that. People like you make me sick, OP.

+1 I honestly thought when I read the title of this thread that it would be from a special needs parent trying to grapple with the idea that their child will never go to college or have a typical adult experience. Please recognize your good fortune OP.

This, exactly. OP, you are very blessed.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SOMEONE COME TO A COLLEGE FORUM AND THINK FOR A SPLIT MINUTE THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH A PHYSICALLY IMPAIRED CHILD? MAJOR DISCONNECT, THIS THREAD IS ODD VERY ODD. WHILE I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PARENTS OF A CHILD WHO CANNOT HEAR, THIS IS A RATHER RANDOM PLACE TO COME AND ASSUME THATS WHATS BEING DISCUSSED.

Dumbass alert!

[Anonymous]

^ PP has a physical (or mental?) impairment that prevents her proper use of upper and lower case letters. Her parents grieve every day about this.

[Anonymous]

This thread is turning silly. Bottom line help and guide your child as best as you can, if you respect his decision allow him to ultimately choose the school, however I would be sure he has had enough exposure to the Ivy, as we all know that is a rare opportunity afforded to so few.

[Anonymous]

I went to Harvard as an undergrad and agree with the Princeton poster re how one of the advantages of having gone to an HYPS is that you come out knowing that it's not such a big deal, especially for kids who are already growing up upper middle class in a big city.

To me, the issue isn't whether DC turns down an Ivy for some other school. It's whether DC has good reasons for the choice being made.

[Anonymous]

Well, my DD turned down 2 Ivies to attend Stanford. I was fine with her choice. My oldest DS turned down an Ivy to attend Wash U. I was fine with that also.

At the end of the day, I realized that their dream for themselves superceded my dream for them. I also saw how happy and excited they were about the chocies they made. Did not take long for me to get over it.

[Anonymous]

The argument that resonates most with me is that OP's very smart child is, in all likelihood, eventually going to attend a professional school (MBA, JD, MD, etc.) or a graduate school program in some particular field. Assuming that is the case, then
OP's alleged Ivy undergraduate "networking" advantage, even if it were really an advantage, is highly unlikely to matter much at all to OP's child as it will be OP's child's law school or graduate program "network" that will be relevant in the long run.
So, OP should not worry so much about "networks" unless she knows her child will not become a professional or seek a graduate degree.

[Anonymous]

OP doesn't care about networking. Thats her excuse.

[Anonymous]

I think regardless of whether or not you agree, to say that the immense and quite powerful cycle of networking/reach at most ivies (most Princeton, Harvard and Yale) is quite remarkable and frankly incomparable to the system at any other school, just saying!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think regardless of whether or not you agree, to say that the immense and quite powerful cycle of networking/reach at most ivies (most Princeton, Harvard and Yale) is quite remarkable and frankly incomparable to the system at any other school, just saying!

How do you know? I graduated from a top 10 non-Ivy that is coveted by many DCUMers. The alumni network is VERY strong worldwide and some of the most powerful people in that country attended the school. So, the network is a definite plus. TBH, I do not know enough about the "powerful cycle of networking/reach at most ivies" because I did not attend one. But I do KNOW that unless you attended other schools and benefitted from the reach/network there, you cannot credibly say that it is "frankly incomparable to the system at any other school."