Dealing with jealous sister who's still TTC

[Anonymous]

Yeah, there is absolutely no way she is the victim in this situation. If she feels a need to attack people she doesn't even know, who are only responding to HER request for feedback..wow..can you even imagine what her sister gets from her?

[Anonymous]

PP, i know, right? i don't even know the sister's side of their story and i already feel sorry for her! i think OP is off her meds and having a manic episode or something.......

[Anonymous]

Guys, hate to break it to you but

OP IS A TROLL

It's gone out of its way to be as crazy as possible on this thread. This is not a real person with a real problem, it's a sick piece of garbage using you all for entertainment. Stop feeding it (or at least only troll-bait it instead of giving it advice).

[Anonymous]

PP made a brilliant point - OP really DOES need to ignore her sister because she cannot tolerate any real or perceived negativity or criticism, as evidenced by her increasingly vitriolic responses to nearly every post! Oy vey, this has been a doozy. OP's inability to take any of this often brilliant and wise advice in as well as her inability to take a look at her own role in her troubled relationships indicate some serious narcissism or even borderline personality disorder. She projects all of her anger and negativity on us and suddenly we're wondering why we're feeling furious - the hallmark of dealing with someone with borderline tendencies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP made a brilliant point - OP really DOES need to ignore her sister because she cannot tolerate any real or perceived negativity or criticism, as evidenced by her increasingly vitriolic responses to nearly every post! Oy vey, this has been a doozy. OP's inability to take any of this often brilliant and wise advice in as well as her inability to take a look at her own role in her troubled relationships indicate some serious narcissism or even borderline personality disorder. She projects all of her anger and negativity on us and suddenly we're wondering why we're feeling furious - the hallmark of dealing with someone with borderline tendencies.

PP again - feeling a bit guilty about my post because this is definitely a sad situation - OP is clearly troubled and hurting, even if she's not aware of it. I don't want to add fuel to the fire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP made a brilliant point - OP really DOES need to ignore her sister because she cannot tolerate any real or perceived negativity or criticism, as evidenced by her increasingly vitriolic responses to nearly every post! Oy vey, this has been a doozy. OP's inability to take any of this often brilliant and wise advice in as well as her inability to take a look at her own role in her troubled relationships indicate some serious narcissism or even borderline personality disorder. She projects all of her anger and negativity on us and suddenly we're wondering why we're feeling furious - the hallmark of dealing with someone with borderline tendencies.

I had the EXACT same thought PP, that this person might have some borderline traits. And it is sad, and it's that pattern of behavior/reactions from others that unfortunately reinforces those traits.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Well the fact that you snarky posters keep responding tells me you want more. Sorry to disappoint you ladies but I have never had a weight problem. I know this probably irritates you more though. And as I said, it will be the posters with the lowest intelligence that will resort to labels and name calling rather than arguing substantively. And I guess we've got a few on here, don't we?

I'll be sure to ask my psychiatrist-aunt about my borderline-personality traits or narcissism too. And maybe my DH too as he is also a doctor.

Yes, I'm sad and troubled. I'm sad and troubled that there are so many nasty women here in the DC-mero area. What is it about this area that breeds the lowest common denominator? Is it the congestion here? The high crime rate in DC? The traffic? Is it that many of you lost your jobs? Are all of you overweight or something? Are you not making enough money to pay off the mortgage or other bills? Did you not get the education or job of your dreams? Are your DH's jerks to you? I don't know what makes people here more mean and negative than in the West, South, and even the Northeast but you women are as ugly on the inside. But it's your issue, not mine.

Interesting how on the other post, I never mentioned all of details of WHY I thought my sister was jealous of me. I never mentioned that I got more dates, that I was more popular, that DH has shown more kindness to me, etc..etc..and I got more positive and supportive replies. Here, the retaliation after mentioning all of these privileges in my life was almost immediate. So it's clear to me the nastiness and negativity toward me, as evidenced by the two totally different outcomes of two separate posts, is because you women brought out your claws because I mentioned all the privileges and benefits I've gotten in my life. Some took it as showing off and others didn't care, they were just jealous.

[Anonymous]

Many people in the beginning suggested that your approach to dealing with your sister was immature. This was long before you felt a need to list your amazing qualities along with endless accounts of your troubled sister relationship. After that you just proved our initial suspicions correct, and you continue to do so.

[Anonymous]

"And maybe my DH too as he is also a doctor."

Explains why OP's DH was able to pay off her student loans!

[Anonymous]

OP: You sound really angry, which is understandable given your sister's behavior over the years. However, it's the built up anger that's really hurting you now. Hate to sound all "Dear Abby", but please consider talking to a therapist to help you conquer your own emotional reactions.

[Anonymous]

OP, so you don't have a weight problem. That's fine. Because your bloated ego takes quite enough space on it's own. You have to compensate somehow.

I think I actually know you in real life. And even though the people around you won't say it to your face, the posters here have nailed it with their observations of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, so you don't have a weight problem. That's fine. Because your bloated ego takes quite enough space on it's own. You have to compensate somehow.

I think I actually know you in real life. And even though the people around you won't say it to your face, the posters here have nailed it with their observations of you.

I can see why no one in OP's life would ever be comfortable being honest with her. I don't even know her and I'm scared of her! She is so venomous, and yes, very angry, and the worst part is that she takes no responsibility at all in this for her own behavior. She'll never change, she's too sick. I agree with PPs that there's a mental health issue going on here - borderline personality disorder or narcissism both seem like intelligent guesses. People like this are sad - if she could just get off her high horse and set aside her pride for a moment, she could examine herself - with the help of an UNBIASED non-family-member therapist - and possibly turn her life toward a more positive direction, but I just don't see that happening here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Well the fact that you snarky posters keep responding tells me you want more. Sorry to disappoint you ladies but I have never had a weight problem. I know this probably irritates you more though. And as I said, it will be the posters with the lowest intelligence that will resort to labels and name calling rather than arguing substantively. And I guess we've got a few on here, don't we?

I'll be sure to ask my psychiatrist-aunt about my borderline-personality traits or narcissism too. And maybe my DH too as he is also a doctor.

Yes, I'm sad and troubled. I'm sad and troubled that there are so many nasty women here in the DC-mero area. What is it about this area that breeds the lowest common denominator? Is it the congestion here? The high crime rate in DC? The traffic? Is it that many of you lost your jobs? Are all of you overweight or something? Are you not making enough money to pay off the mortgage or other bills? Did you not get the education or job of your dreams? Are your DH's jerks to you? I don't know what makes people here more mean and negative than in the West, South, and even the Northeast but you women are as ugly on the inside. But it's your issue, not mine.

Interesting how on the other post, I never mentioned all of details of WHY I thought my sister was jealous of me. I never mentioned that I got more dates, that I was more popular, that DH has shown more kindness to me, etc..etc..and I got more positive and supportive replies. Here, the retaliation after mentioning all of these privileges in my life was almost immediate. So it's clear to me the nastiness and negativity toward me, as evidenced by the two totally different outcomes of two separate posts, is because you women brought out your claws because I mentioned all the privileges and benefits I've gotten in my life. Some took it as showing off and others didn't care, they were just jealous.

Hi OP - maybe you could spend some of the time you have taken to spread all the hate you have (hate to your sister, hate to the women who are TTC, hate to women of DC, hate to yourself) and try and send that energy to something positive, maybe the child growing inside of you? Maybe working on a project?

You seem to be well written - so I assume you are educated, if not angry.

Best of luck on your pregnancy -

A women who is not jealous of you at all and feels sorry for your angry, sad life.

[Anonymous]

Oh - and maybe you should get some help before you become an abuser to your child as well. I can help recommend a good "break the cycle" doctor if you are interested. It seems the abuse you suffered by your mother seems to be coming out all over this thread.

Please get help before you hurt your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many people in the beginning suggested that your approach to dealing with your sister was immature. This was long before you felt a need to list your amazing qualities along with endless accounts of your troubled sister relationship.[i] After that you just proved our initial suspicions correct, and you continue to do so.

Ummm, not quite PP. Reread the first post. I actually did make numerous comparisons between my sister and I right from the get go, from my very first post. I didn't do that in my original thread. The difference in the response between the two threads is just remarkable but probably understandable given the number of unhappy, frustrated, and tired women here in the DC metro area. Honestly, there is no other explanation for the unbelievably unsupportive and rude responses I received on this thread as opposed to the other thread.

Between my husband and my aunt who is a doctor and psychiatrist, respectively, I think I would know if I had any disorder. I don't need you psych majors from Northern Virginia Community College or Southwestern Rinky Dink University diagnosing me.

Lets see, I've been called egocentric, a bitch, having personality disorders, that I'm quite possibly overweight, that I likely will abuse my child...Personality disorders are often characterized by belittling and disparaging someone because of one's own fragile ego. The mud slinging began first with you women, not me, and in clear response to my listing the benefits and privileges I had over my sister. So it would appear to me that it was your own ego that took a hit because I suspect you women see too much of yourselves in my description of my sister and resented that I criticized her. That was when you began the mud slinging. So it seems to me that the nasty women here fit the personality disorder characterization much better than I do.

Yes, I retaliated, but only afterward and only after the mean spirited comments.

If I were to tell you I'm slightly overweight with bad skin, live in a lower middle class neighborhood, had a poor education, and a lousy husband, I'd bet I'd get more support. Misery loves company. So shameful.

It's important to accept criticism where criticism is just and deserving. My ownership in this whole issue is that I probably should never have told my mother about my pregnancy so that it would never put her in an uncomfortable position of having to lie or withhold information. I don't like to be responsible for anyone's lying. So, no, I don't have any issue with accepting criticism where the judgment is truly fair.

I have a feeling this is not the end of it for you nasty women. You will continue to respond with snarkiness any opportunity you get on DCUM with other threads. I think it probably helps for you to vent your frustrations from life.