Absolutely repulsed by intimacy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same situation in our marriage. Am nearing the end of peri and began to tell DH over a year ago I’m not interested, and I will let him know when that changes.

The truth is I doubt my mind is ever going to change and I’m fine with never doing it again.

But he keeps bringing it up!it’s so annoying. How do I get him to stop bring up s*x ?

Have you met any men???

[Anonymous]

59 same sister!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went for a CO2 laser vag rejuv for vaginal atrophy after menopause and it is a game changer. Took care of all my GSM issues. Of course, this is not available in USA.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37395104/

I’m glad it worked out but I got the same results using an estrogen/test compound cream. It’s gradual but works. After several years on it my specialist says my vaginal tissue looks like a 20 year olds. And sex feels great now.

Same!!! Must be patient but now wow!

[Anonymous]

I’m too exhausted for sex. Always, always I just want to climb in bed and sleep. DH wants to resume that part of our lives together, but the thought of it makes me feel overwhelmed with exhaustion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, 48 yo DH here. I have a wonderful, attractive wife.

I feel bad for all the men married to these strange women who profess to never want "intimacy" again. Crazy.

Sounds like divorce is needed in all cases.

😬

[Anonymous]

Well, TBH frigidity is a common and known side effect in many, if not most menopausal women.

[Anonymous]

As a DH, when my wife went through peri she became a different woman. Unfortunately she became someone who no longer possessed any of the qualities that attracted me to her. I never cheated, but she did because of all the HRT (according to her). Now she loves me and wants to work on us, but I am resentful and disgusted by her.

You are going through a difficult time and are likely less attractive to your mate as well. Maybe try to engage the empathy that you want to be shown and remember who you are and want to be vs how you feel. Making life changing decisions on momentary emotional angst just forces that turmoil on the people you committed to and built a life with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're not alone. I'm 54 and have become basically asexual. I used to love kissing and sex. Hit me about your age after a baby and soon after my DH falling down an ideological rabbit hole of Joe Rogan, Jordan Peterson, and other repulsive shitstains. But even the fantasy of an affair or the early demise of my DH followed by the hottest guy ever after an appropriate mourning period holds no appeal at all.

I suppose you could go for testosterone HRT. I've decided against that because my vaginal atrophy post menopause is so painful that I don't want to want it.

I'm a DH who pulled out of an ideological nose dive. I fell into that rabbit hole looking for solutions to my wife not wanting to have sex much anymore. The first solutions I found (e.g. do more around the house, date night, touching with no expectations of sex, etc.) didn't do anything. So I kept looking and hit the manosphere. They offered things like work out and dress better, which ... sure. But then it was a little more questionable ... when you do have sex, make sure you act dominant. (How well that work isn't built in, depends on the particular woman's wiring and mood from time to time). Then more and more, it was tough to ignore the rampant misogyny and even racism. At first the misogyny seemed like an unfortunate side to what might be valuable advice (nothing else was working). But then it became apparent that the whole culture is a misogynistic shit show.

Our sex life never did come back, but at least she loves me and my family life is good. If I'd continued on with the red pill nonsense, my sex life would probably still be bad *and* my home life would be terrible.

This is really nice to read. My husband had a similar thing happen and also came out of it realizing that he was getting into stuff that was racist. It's good to hear these stories.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Me of 3 years ago would agree with OP….after a divorce I realize that I didn’t like my husband at all. The dislike made all contact seem gross. 3 years later, new partner of over a year - sex is great!

Is this honeymoon phase or you think sex is going to stay like this for a long time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m too exhausted for sex. Always, always I just want to climb in bed and sleep. DH wants to resume that part of our lives together, but the thought of it makes me feel overwhelmed with exhaustion.

how old are you?

[Anonymous]

Start reading smut. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same situation in our marriage. Am nearing the end of peri and began to tell DH over a year ago I’m not interested, and I will let him know when that changes.

The truth is I doubt my mind is ever going to change and I’m fine with never doing it again.

But he keeps bringing it up!it’s so annoying. How do I get him to stop bring up s*x ?

Hopefully you have opened up the marriage for him. Otherwise, that is effectively spousal abuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start reading smut. Seriously.

Can you recommend a book?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same situation in our marriage. Am nearing the end of peri and began to tell DH over a year ago I’m not interested, and I will let him know when that changes.

The truth is I doubt my mind is ever going to change and I’m fine with never doing it again.

But he keeps bringing it up!it’s so annoying. How do I get him to stop bring up s*x ?

Yikes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a DH, when my wife went through peri she became a different woman. Unfortunately she became someone who no longer possessed any of the qualities that attracted me to her. I never cheated, but she did because of all the HRT (according to her). Now she loves me and wants to work on us, but I am resentful and disgusted by her.

You are going through a difficult time and are likely less attractive to your mate as well. Maybe try to engage the empathy that you want to be shown and remember who you are and want to be vs how you feel. Making life changing decisions on momentary emotional angst just forces that turmoil on the people you committed to and built a life with.

Me too!