No sex drive and dh and I argue over it constantly!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s mostly ‘joke’ bickering but obviously he’s frustrated. I don’t blame him but it is just so hard to get in the mood. I’m exhausted most of the time, have headaches a lot, etc. Honestly if I found out he got it elsewhere on occasion, there’s part of me that would not care. I know he loves me and we will be together.

Anyone else navigating this issue?

Yes!

Though not really navigating it; just enduring the new situation (and also encountering bickering).

But, always looking for constructive suggestions! - with a few caveats:

No, we are NOT “opening the marriage;” no “hall pass,” etc. not happening. And NO- will not divorce, so that’s not happening either.

With that said: other suggestions? Ideas? Things to try?

Deal w a life of no sex or intimacy

[Anonymous]

Read smut books

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s mostly ‘joke’ bickering but obviously he’s frustrated. I don’t blame him but it is just so hard to get in the mood. I’m exhausted most of the time, have headaches a lot, etc. Honestly if I found out he got it elsewhere on occasion, there’s part of me that would not care. I know he loves me and we will be together.

Anyone else navigating this issue?

Yes!

Though not really navigating it; just enduring the new situation (and also encountering bickering).

But, always looking for constructive suggestions! - with a few caveats:

No, we are NOT “opening the marriage;” no “hall pass,” etc. not happening. And NO- will not divorce, so that’s not happening either.

With that said: other suggestions? Ideas? Things to try?

You need to go through the effort to find your husband a new sexual partner. Otherwise, ending his sexual life without his say is tantamount to spousal abuse.

I already said that I/we have specifically ruled that out! Not helpful.

Anyone have useful work-arounds to suggest?!

So you ruled it out. He might think different. What’s your idea of a "work around"?

[Anonymous]

I had a testosterone pellet inserted about a month ago. Game changer. Suddenly wanted sex all the time. Might want to look into it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a testosterone pellet inserted about a month ago. Game changer. Suddenly wanted sex all the time. Might want to look into it.

What doctor does this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s mostly ‘joke’ bickering but obviously he’s frustrated. I don’t blame him but it is just so hard to get in the mood. I’m exhausted most of the time, have headaches a lot, etc. Honestly if I found out he got it elsewhere on occasion, there’s part of me that would not care. I know he loves me and we will be together.

Anyone else navigating this issue?

Yes!

Though not really navigating it; just enduring the new situation (and also encountering bickering).

But, always looking for constructive suggestions! - with a few caveats:

No, we are NOT “opening the marriage;” no “hall pass,” etc. not happening. And NO- will not divorce, so that’s not happening either.

With that said: other suggestions? Ideas? Things to try?

You need to go through the effort to find your husband a new sexual partner. Otherwise, ending his sexual life without his say is tantamount to spousal abuse.

I already said that I/we have specifically ruled that out! Not helpful.

Anyone have useful work-arounds to suggest?!

You need to have more sex with your husband. We know you don’t want to but it’s on you to find a way to make yourself want it more. Some women suggest reading smut.

DH and I had a dry spell and honestly things only got better when he decided to have more sex with me and lay off the porn and self care. And then I believe he found himself enjoying it more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s mostly ‘joke’ bickering but obviously he’s frustrated. I don’t blame him but it is just so hard to get in the mood. I’m exhausted most of the time, have headaches a lot, etc. Honestly if I found out he got it elsewhere on occasion, there’s part of me that would not care. I know he loves me and we will be together.

Anyone else navigating this issue?

Yes!

Though not really navigating it; just enduring the new situation (and also encountering bickering).

But, always looking for constructive suggestions! - with a few caveats:

No, we are NOT “opening the marriage;” no “hall pass,” etc. not happening. And NO- will not divorce, so that’s not happening either.

With that said: other suggestions? Ideas? Things to try?

You need to go through the effort to find your husband a new sexual partner. Otherwise, ending his sexual life without his say is tantamount to spousal abuse.

I already said that I/we have specifically ruled that out! Not helpful.

Anyone have useful work-arounds to suggest?!

So you ruled it out. He might think different. What’s your idea of a "work around"?

+1
Like seriously

[Anonymous]

Valentine’s Day and my expectation is dinner and that’s it. Intimacy and sex in my marriage are dead. I’ve tried everything from being romantic to increasing help around the house. My wife just doesn’t like to be intimate. She has always had awkward kisses hello and goodbye. Now combined with peri, it is just me, myself, and I.

[Anonymous]

Get on testosterone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Valentine’s Day and my expectation is dinner and that’s it. Intimacy and sex in my marriage are dead. I’ve tried everything from being romantic to increasing help around the house. My wife just doesn’t like to be intimate. She has always had awkward kisses hello and goodbye. Now combined with peri, it is just me, myself, and I.

Stay Strong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Valentine’s Day and my expectation is dinner and that’s it. Intimacy and sex in my marriage are dead. I’ve tried everything from being romantic to increasing help around the house. My wife just doesn’t like to be intimate. She has always had awkward kisses hello and goodbye. Now combined with peri, it is just me, myself, and I.

Stay Strong.

And strength to her as perimenopause is a beast

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a testosterone pellet inserted about a month ago. Game changer. Suddenly wanted sex all the time. Might want to look into it.

What doctor does this?

my doctor wont because the dosing isn't steady or controllable. i can use the cream but then i'm concerned about getting it on others and frankly i'm just terrible about regular application.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Valentine’s Day and my expectation is dinner and that’s it. Intimacy and sex in my marriage are dead. I’ve tried everything from being romantic to increasing help around the house. My wife just doesn’t like to be intimate. She has always had awkward kisses hello and goodbye. Now combined with peri, it is just me, myself, and I.

do you think she is getting it somewhere?

If not, then you need to have a FWB on the side and you can let her know about it too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Valentine’s Day and my expectation is dinner and that’s it. Intimacy and sex in my marriage are dead. I’ve tried everything from being romantic to increasing help around the house. My wife just doesn’t like to be intimate. She has always had awkward kisses hello and goodbye. Now combined with peri, it is just me, myself, and I.

Stay Strong.

And strength to her as perimenopause is a beast

Get some T like others are saying and then you would want D all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a testosterone pellet inserted about a month ago. Game changer. Suddenly wanted sex all the time. Might want to look into it.

any other symptoms - hair loss, hair on face, deep voice, etc?