DS Wants to Transfer, DH Pushing Back

[Anonymous]

Emory is probably academically more rigorous and not as much fun as Boston.

[Anonymous]

Atlanta really does suck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Atlanta really does suck.

How so?

[Anonymous]

I would NOT be involved in the transfer process ... If your young adult son wants to make a change, it’s on him ... Wanting to make a change and actually doing it are 2 different things

Your DS needs to do the hard work. And yes he does the hard work without knowing the outcome.i

[Anonymous]

DS sounds WASPy. So not surprised at preferring Tufts/Boston over Emory/ATL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS sounds WASPy. So not surprised at preferring Tufts/Boston over Emory/ATL.

This is so stupid. There are PLENTY OF social justice warrior and crunchy types in Boston and jock good ol boys in Atlanta.

These elite universities and metro areas can't be reduced so easily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These comments are being unfair to DH. If I'm paying 250k+ for my childs education. I should have a say in where they go, and yes the difference between Emory and Tufts may be small but would still want to go with the better school and bigger bragging rights. That's also fair.

Really? Bragging rights weigh more heavily on your mind than your child's mental health/happiness?

[Anonymous]

Depends on who is paying. The parent who is paying g ts to make the decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on who is paying. The parent who is paying g ts to make the decision.

NO. The kid is launching. They should chose where they live, what alum they want to be, what advisors/academic options appeal to them.

It is ugly and self-centered to rule by checkbook.

You should use this opportunity convince them that you have faith in their ability to make good choices, to forge a path to their future.

I feel very bad for this poster's kids. He probably treats his wife the same way.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don’t know why your DH pushed so hard for Emory over Tufts. They are basically equivalent schools. Now, Normal freshman adjustment is being seen through the lens of him going to his second choice school.

Are they equivalent?

Emory is ranked higher but the student body from a brainpower perspective is completely interchangeable. A lot of Northeast MidAtlantic students, a strong jewish population, very smart kids who didn’t get into an Ivy or a better ranked school.

You can say this about Northeastern or Tulane. All of these schools have high stats that's not what separates them.

Exactly. All of this argument about tiny differences is ridiculous. The median SAT scores for Tufts, Emory, Northeastern, Cornell, Harvard and Vanderbilt are all in the 99th percentile. For Boston College and Tulane, it's the 98th percentile. There's essentially no difference in the ability levels of students at these colleges.

+100

There is no difference between the students in schools ranked 25 - 45 or so. Why are you all so hung up on USNWR rankings? The academically quality and prestige of these schools are interchangeable.

For one Emory is ranked 20 or 21 depending on the ranking so your own criteria wouldn't apply. And two there's a big difference between USC and Brandies. Emory is a top 20ish school while Tufts have never been ranked that highly. However I do agree that the difference isn't large enough for DS to stay if there truly unhappy.

a) Where did USC and Brandeis enter the conversation?

b) The median SAT score for USC is 99th percentile. For Brandeis it's approximately the 97th percentile. How is that a big difference? I mean. I agree there's a big difference between the two, but it's got nothing to do with the quality of the students or the academics.

c) Rankings are only relevant to applicants who believe that the criteria used are the most representative of their needs. USNWR has pretended for decades that their criteria reflect everyone's needs, but they don't. Use different criteria and you'll get very different results.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on who is paying. The parent who is paying g ts to make the decision.

That’s a pretty stupid attitude.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don’t know why your DH pushed so hard for Emory over Tufts. They are basically equivalent schools. Now, Normal freshman adjustment is being seen through the lens of him going to his second choice school.

Are they equivalent?

Emory is ranked higher but the student body from a brainpower perspective is completely interchangeable. A lot of Northeast MidAtlantic students, a strong jewish population, very smart kids who didn’t get into an Ivy or a better ranked school.

You can say this about Northeastern or Tulane. All of these schools have high stats that's not what separates them.

Exactly. All of this argument about tiny differences is ridiculous. The median SAT scores for Tufts, Emory, Northeastern, Cornell, Harvard and Vanderbilt are all in the 99th percentile. For Boston College and Tulane, it's the 98th percentile. There's essentially no difference in the ability levels of students at these colleges.

+100

There is no difference between the students in schools ranked 25 - 45 or so. Why are you all so hung up on USNWR rankings? The academically quality and prestige of these schools are interchangeable.

For one Emory is ranked 20 or 21 depending on the ranking so your own criteria wouldn't apply. And two there's a big difference between USC and Brandies. Emory is a top 20ish school while Tufts have never been ranked that highly. However I do agree that the difference isn't large enough for DS to stay if there truly unhappy.

a) Where did USC and Brandeis enter the conversation?

b) The median SAT score for USC is 99th percentile. For Brandeis it's approximately the 97th percentile. How is that a big difference? I mean. I agree there's a big difference between the two, but it's got nothing to do with the quality of the students or the academics.

c) Rankings are only relevant to applicants who believe that the criteria used are the most representative of their needs. USNWR has pretended for decades that their criteria reflect everyone's needs, but they don't. Use different criteria and you'll get very different results.

USC is ranked 27 and Brandies 42, so I was saying there is a big difference between schools ranked 25-45. Emory is ranked higher on multiple rankings however.... Either way if OPs son is on the verge of depression then he should leave. I'm sure Emory doesn't want that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on who is paying. The parent who is paying g ts to make the decision.

NO. The kid is launching. They should chose where they live, what alum they want to be, what advisors/academic options appeal to them.

It is ugly and self-centered to rule by checkbook.

You should use this opportunity convince them that you have faith in their ability to make good choices, to forge a path to their future.

I feel very bad for this poster's kids. He probably treats his wife the same way.

Actually, I'm a woman. I was also LMC growing up, so my perspective is different. I would have loved to be able to afford to go to a college like Emory or Tufts. I had to go where there was money to send me. K

To me, the ds in this situation sounds a bit spoiled, and maybe his dad realizes that. I could understand transferring to a completely different type of school (large public, small LAC).but to someone like me transferring because of skiing to a school that's much of a muchness sounds odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on who is paying. The parent who is paying g ts to make the decision.

NO. The kid is launching. They should chose where they live, what alum they want to be, what advisors/academic options appeal to them.

It is ugly and self-centered to rule by checkbook.

You should use this opportunity convince them that you have faith in their ability to make good choices, to forge a path to their future.

I feel very bad for this poster's kids. He probably treats his wife the same way.

Actually, I'm a woman. I was also LMC growing up, so my perspective is different. I would have loved to be able to afford to go to a college like Emory or Tufts. I had to go where there was money to send me. K

To me, the ds in this situation sounds a bit spoiled, and maybe his dad realizes that. I could understand transferring to a completely different type of school (large public, small LAC).but to someone like me transferring because of skiing to a school that's much of a muchness sounds odd.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I don’t know why your DH pushed so hard for Emory over Tufts. They are basically equivalent schools. Now, Normal freshman adjustment is being seen through the lens of him going to his second choice school.

Are they equivalent?

Emory is ranked higher but the student body from a brainpower perspective is completely interchangeable. A lot of Northeast MidAtlantic students, a strong jewish population, very smart kids who didn’t get into an Ivy or a better ranked school.

You can say this about Northeastern or Tulane. All of these schools have high stats that's not what separates them.

Exactly. All of this argument about tiny differences is ridiculous. The median SAT scores for Tufts, Emory, Northeastern, Cornell, Harvard and Vanderbilt are all in the 99th percentile. For Boston College and Tulane, it's the 98th percentile. There's essentially no difference in the ability levels of students at these colleges.

+100

There is no difference between the students in schools ranked 25 - 45 or so. Why are you all so hung up on USNWR rankings? The academically quality and prestige of these schools are interchangeable.

For one Emory is ranked 20 or 21 depending on the ranking so your own criteria wouldn't apply. And two there's a big difference between USC and Brandies. Emory is a top 20ish school while Tufts have never been ranked that highly. However I do agree that the difference isn't large enough for DS to stay if there truly unhappy.

a) Where did USC and Brandeis enter the conversation?

b) The median SAT score for USC is 99th percentile. For Brandeis it's approximately the 97th percentile. How is that a big difference? I mean. I agree there's a big difference between the two, but it's got nothing to do with the quality of the students or the academics.

c) Rankings are only relevant to applicants who believe that the criteria used are the most representative of their needs. USNWR has pretended for decades that their criteria reflect everyone's needs, but they don't. Use different criteria and you'll get very different results.

USC is ranked 27 and Brandies 42, so I was saying there is a big difference between schools ranked 25-45. Emory is ranked higher on multiple rankings however.... Either way if OPs son is on the verge of depression then he should leave. I'm sure Emory doesn't want that.

I'm glad we agree about the mental health aspect of this.

I do think it's important to continue to address the misunderstanding about rankings, though, because so many people here seem to place so much weight on them, and that is a huge part of what is leading to a generation of stressed out, depressed kids. Consider this: USNWR has Emory at #21 and Tufts at #30 in my 2021 Best Colleges guide. Here's how they differ on some of the more important individual criteria they use to come up with those rankings, with Northeastern at #49 added for emphasis.....


Criterion Emory Tufts Northeastern

Opinions of college officials 4.1 3.8 3.5
first-year retention % 94 96 97
6-year grad. rate 90 94 89
% classes under 20 62 68 68
% classes over 50 13 8 6
student/faculty ratio 9/1 9/1 14/1
25th-75th SAT percentile 1360-1530 1390-1540 1390-1540
Frosh in top 10% of class 84 80 75

How does that all add up to any of these colleges being stronger than the other? The distance between colleges near the top of the list and those further down appears large because there are so many of them that are excellent, leading to very comparable schools necessarily being separated by numbers that some take to imply a difference in quality. The reason Emory is perennially higher on the USNWR list is because they use criteria and weights that are favorable to Emory. And those criteria do not include the quality of classroom instruction, because it's not measurable. USNWR only tries to infer it from other factors.

We need to stop using this as an absolute measure of quality. It's not.