MIL super upset that I don’t always answer the phone—and she wasn’t event calling!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:You were rude AF that's why she's freezing you out. Saying you wait for an emergency to call you back once or twice or call 911 is gross. It's not even true, you know you check your missed calls. You got what you deserve.

OP was not rude. MIL was pushing to get the (what she perceives to be) correct answer that she wanted, and it wasn’t there. She should have stopped digging. If you keep poking at someone, you may not like the answers you get. What would you like OP to do, lie? Lie and say oh yes I do answer the phone every time it rings?

Well, since you were there you would know, right? OP did lie. She checks her missed calls she just wanted to be an ass to her MIL.

Can you read? OP said she would call the person back if it isn’t a telemarketer. Is it that you can’t read, or that you can’t comprehend what you read?

Oh you missed the part about letting peopel call her back if its an emergency or call 911? Maybe read it again.

THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT SOMEONE WOULD DO IN AN EMERGENCY. Are you crazy? Is it only 85 year olds on DCUM today? I do not understand who you people are and why this bothers you? OP was telling it like it is.

Are you insane? They were having a basic conversation. DIL got snarky and MIL is just keeping to herself now. Why would DIL even bother posting this nonsense.

Because this forum is where many of us go to get a bit of commiseration before going back into the family fray. OP did and said nothing wrong, and MIL is indeed crazy to think people must answer their cell phones every time they ring in 2021.

The point isn't how do we use cell phones as much as it is, it's how to manage conflict. DIL failed miserably.

Nope. MIL pushing for a fourth answer about something that was none of her business in the first place was absurd. Who are all these old attention-seeking women throwing tantrums and giving silent treatment like four-year-olds unless others kiss their behinds?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Poop and then leave.

God, phone addicted adults are BIZARRE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Years ago my dad had a visit from someone trying to sell him insurance. They were sitting in my parents' kitchen and the phone started ringing and dad just ignored it. Before answering machines were common. The salesman gets uncomfortable and finally asks if he is going to answer it. My dad says, "you know, every so often that thing on the wall makes that noise, but I find that if I just ignore it, it goes away." The salesman didn't spend much more time there.

LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Are you 16?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Are you 16?

No, I'm in my 60s. You?

[Anonymous]

Team op

[Anonymous]

I don't know mil's age but part of this could be generational. The elderly often rely much more on phones than on texts.

Texts often resolve the issue of things that need an immediate reply quickly, which may not be a 911 situation. For ex, when I took our elderly mother to get her covid booster, she couldn't find her vaccine card and the pharmacy wouldn't give her the booster without it. It turns out sis had it and could send me a photo.

If my parents call and I'm very busy, I usually respond by saying i'm very busy right now and can I call them back. They are very understanding. But I realize not everyone has the same family dynamics.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:You were rude AF that's why she's freezing you out. Saying you wait for an emergency to call you back once or twice or call 911 is gross. It's not even true, you know you check your missed calls. You got what you deserve.

OP was not rude. MIL was pushing to get the (what she perceives to be) correct answer that she wanted, and it wasn’t there. She should have stopped digging. If you keep poking at someone, you may not like the answers you get. What would you like OP to do, lie? Lie and say oh yes I do answer the phone every time it rings?

Well, since you were there you would know, right? OP did lie. She checks her missed calls she just wanted to be an ass to her MIL.

Can you read? OP said she would call the person back if it isn’t a telemarketer. Is it that you can’t read, or that you can’t comprehend what you read?

Oh you missed the part about letting peopel call her back if its an emergency or call 911? Maybe read it again.

THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT SOMEONE WOULD DO IN AN EMERGENCY. Are you crazy? Is it only 85 year olds on DCUM today? I do not understand who you people are and why this bothers you? OP was telling it like it is.

Are you insane? They were having a basic conversation. DIL got snarky and MIL is just keeping to herself now. Why would DIL even bother posting this nonsense.

Because this forum is where many of us go to get a bit of commiseration before going back into the family fray. OP did and said nothing wrong, and MIL is indeed crazy to think people must answer their cell phones every time they ring in 2021.

The point isn't how do we use cell phones as much as it is, it's how to manage conflict. DIL failed miserably.

Nope, MIL couldn’t stop pushing, and she’s the one who can’t read a room. OP said the first time, perfectly reasonably, that she was busy at the moment and would call the person back if it wasn’t a telemarketer. And then MIL went on and on. I’m sorry this is triggering your personal issues, PP, but there’s nothing unreasonable about not dropping everything to answer your phone each and every time it rings, and saying so.

Perfectly reasonably? Nope. I'm sure the tone was different. If you can embellish and add details to the OP then so can anyone else. This isn't about the phone, this is about being civil with guests in your own home. Change the subject next time. Or be pissy about the cold shoulder. Tough choice.

Be civil with guests? OP was perfectly civil. No voices were raised. No foul language was used. No insults were lobbed. No sarcasm or nasty tone was uttered. What is wrong with you, PP? Have you been drinking? I’m being serious. You’re unusually invested in some narrative here that you’ve conceived in your head.

How do we even know MIL is freezing DIL out? We only have 1/2 of a this nonsense story. What exactly has MIL done in this situation at all? She asked questions, DIL answered, the end. The freezing out exists in insecure DIL head.

NP. Honestly asking: what has triggered you so much with this story/scenario? As another poster asked, have you been drinking all day? If not, what is it that makes this such a hot-button issue for you? Genuinely curious. Genuinely hoping if you tell us we can help you figure out whatever is bothering you.

I think she's rude. End of story. And I have to kill some time. It's bizarre some people buy everything the DILs say here hook, line and sinker. Every time. Like half of these aren't troll posts to begin with.

You might want to step away from DCUM and/or the Family Relationships forum if this bothers you so much. You seem really agitated and obsessed. Not a good look.

Notice how OP hasn't been back? Classic troll post. This never happened.

OP hasn’t been back because you hijacked her thread with all of your personal crazy.

[Anonymous]

NP. This thread is really weird. Who cares where you charge your phone or if you let it ring out if you don't want to answer it.

I think the MIL was nosy to see who was calling and then got upset because she found out her DIL didn't always answer her calls. She seemed to take that personally.

In this case the MIL has personalised something that she shouldn't have. It doesn't matter if the MIL feels like this DIL should have answered the phone, they are different people with different preferences.

The fact that the MIL is now having a quiet moment is silly, she pushed for this silliness and is now upset that her DIL answered her directly. OP hasn't said anything other than what she does or thinks, it's ok that OP has an opinion, why is the MIL taking this personally.

Or perhaps the MIL thought she would educate OP on how things should be done and got upset when her ideas were ignored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Gross. So you would answer a call while you were pooping? Oh wait, you wouldn’t? HOW WEIRD IS THAT?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Are you 16?

No, I'm in my 60s. You?

NP. Ah, I see. Your unsanitary habits are already setting in, as they do with many elderly people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Are you 16?

No, I'm in my 60s. You?

NP. Ah, I see. Your unsanitary habits are already setting in, as they do with many elderly people.

Um, ok. I've been reading stuff on the toilet since I was a child, how is the phone any different? I have a great book on my kindle app.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I only answer my phone if I feel like it and I quite often don't feel like it once I see who it is. However, I keep it with me at all times. I don't leave it upstairs and then let it ring, how weird is that?

Emergency calls don't always involve a scenario where someone else can just call 911 if you don't answer. I want to know if a friend or loved one is having an emergency that I need to know about or they wouldn't be calling me.

It’s called charging sometimes. Do you carry it in the shower? To the toilet? If not, then GASP, you do let it ring—*how weird is that?*

You only charge in, what, your bedroom? How weird is that! There's a solution for that too. I already said I often let it ring, or actually I let it buzz because my ringer is off 95% of the time. And yes, I definitely take it to the toilet, what else do you do while you sit there but phone stuff?

Are you 16?

No, I'm in my 60s. You?

NP. Ah, I see. Your unsanitary habits are already setting in, as they do with many elderly people.

Um, ok. I've been reading stuff on the toilet since I was a child, how is the phone any different? I have a great book on my kindle app.

Put the phone down and eat more fiber.