Considering getting my parents an apartment in the same building as me...am I crazy?
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Anonymous
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I’m downsizing to an apartment now that the kids are grown and out of the house.
My parents (85 and 92) still live in their house. They have been very resistant to moving out. They’re still independent for the most part and in good shape, but their house is 3 stories and it’s a lot for them to handle. The building where I’m moving has larger apartments and I think they could be really comfortable there. Obviously, I’d be able to check in on them a lot more regularly than I currently do. The downside is that I can envision a scenario where I’d get knocks on my door all the time from my dad...but at 92 in a way I want to be there for him whenever he’d want to see me. Am I crazy? Is this a terrible idea? Has anyone done this? |
Anonymous
| Sounds wonderful. I would do it. |
Anonymous
| I think you're crazy to think you'll be able to convince them to move into an apartment. Otherwise, it makes a lot of sense. |
Anonymous
| I know someone who did this in our condo building. Sounded like a great solution and potentially a good investment. |
Anonymous
| If you get along well with them, what's crazy about this idea? I think it's nice. |
Anonymous
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I think it is unhealthy.
If they moved to an over 55 community all their amenities will be right there which will encourage independence ... which is healthy. If you are close you will do everything for them which will make their health decline faster. |
Anonymous
Why do you assume she would do everything for them? |
Anonymous
This. You might not be able to convince them but if you can, great. Are you married? I’m single and would not want my parents that close for dating reasons. Like giving a guy a good night kiss and having my parents walk by! Otherwise, go for it. |
Anonymous
Because they'd be constantly calling and knocking on the door and guilt-tripping her. She's basically signing up to be an unpaid maid / go-fer / lackey. |
Anonymous
| If you can convince them, it would be great. |
Anonymous
Just imagine you are cuddling with your boyfriend, and then dad knocks on the door to ask if you picked up the laxatives for him from CVS. You try to ignore him and hope he goes away... but then he calls the cops for a "well check" because "I'm concerned about her, I know she's in there!" |
Anonymous
| Would you be moving them far from friends and a social network? If not, it sounds like a good plan to me assuming they are willing. |
Anonymous
| Depends on your relationship with your parents. |
Anonymous
I don't see where she says that in her post. She says her dad might knock on her door a lot, but I saw that as about seeking her company, not about guilt-tripping or turning her into a maid/lackey, whatever. She knows her parents and her relationship with them. |
Anonymous
| I would do it! That said, my ILs live IN MY HOUSE so a nearby condo sounds great to me. |