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Some women literally marry their first BF and others are looking well into their thirties.
Is it about how good looking you are? Being smarter? Luck? What? |
| Combination of what you said and more, probably. There isn't one universally applicable reason. |
| Some of us are crazy. Seriously. And not working on it. |
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Uh, if I had married my first boyfriend, I'd have been in deep trouble.
You have to know yourself and know what kind of person you want to be with and know whether you're sabotaging yourself. Age is less important. |
| Personally, I don't think marrying your first boyfriend is winning. |
Why not? |
Why? I know a girl who married her first boyfriend that she met at 23. He is smart rich good looking and has a great job. He is also madly in love with her. She couldn’t be happier. |
| My single friends who are finding it extremely hard are either a) incredibly selective (he has to be a certain height and income), or b) not really doing anything to meet someone (work long hours, don't do the bar scene or any other singles-friendly activities, don't want to date online). |
That's a sample of one. |
And why do you think it's universally a problem to marry your first BF? |
No experience. You're putting all your eggs in one basket with no comparison to what else could be out there for you. See the DCUM thread on marrying young and then wanting out of the marriage in your 40's. But hey, some people would just rather be married than actually have a successful, fulfilling marriage. |
| Some people find a career they love right out of college, and others take longer to find their calling. Some people get pregnant right away and others have infertility issues. I would say it’s probably just luck. BUT, as someone who got married at 25 and is really happy with my husband 7 years later, I do feel that I’m a little less picky than some of my friends who are still single. Like sometimes they reject guys for reasons that seem so silly to me - eg minor political diffs, embarrassing taste in music, bad clothes, etc. |
| Life is different for different people. |
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I don't really know what to say about this because I don't necessarily consider myself happily married. Maybe more like "okay" married and we're probably not getting a divorce. Been married 12 years - 3 kids.
I dated a LOT of people between the ages of 15 and 25, before getting married at 25. I dated my HS BF for 2 years. Two college BFs for one year each. And a number of people for a few or a couple of months. I will say that around the time I met my husband, I had recently read He's Just Not that into you - and I actually really internalized that book. I did feel like I was getting strung along by at least one person after reading that - and cut it off. And I was right that I was being strung along. I know that I did want to get married and have kids and I suppose I made some decisions with that in mind. I know this is kind of a dumb thing to think but after college graduation I seriously thought that I might like to go abroad for a few years - but I really thought, well, if I want to get married and start a family - I want to live near-ish to my family and not in another country so I really don't think being out of the country will set me up for that necessarily. Idk if that's weird but that's my thought process. Who knows what would have happened if I went abroad! And I'm sure some people have done it and they think it's the best decision they ever made. I was kind of a serial dater and I used to consider myself an "equal opportunity" dater. I didn't have a type per se. I was open to anyone I liked for whatever reason. |
What’s there to experience I’d get lucky with the first try? She literally won the lottery of dating at first try. And he has all the qualities: smart kind successful nice family great sense of style high status etc Why would she go back into the dating pool? |