My sister just tried to stage a parenting intervention with me, basically

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Being super strict like OP’s sister isn’t healthy and responsible. Kids need to learn how to moderate themselves. It is a skill, and best taught when you still have control over them if they are not able to do it successfully themselves.

My kids are in private school and all their friends play games together on IPads and occasionally have fries at the country club pool grill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would go out and get the kids some Mickey D’s in response. And have them eat it in front of her kids.

No need to punish the sisters kids for having a lunatic mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Stop being so black and white. There’s a difference between getting some screen time on vacation and eating some yummy treats and letting your kids eat “garbage fast food” and “become addicted” to screens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to screw herself.

And in 10 years you can compare which colleges/universities and degrees each of these kids are graduating from.

I guarantee helicopter mom will be surprised.

Why is this same sort of snark parroted here over and over? It's really not "helicopter" -- and by they you mean crazy and overbearing -- to not let you children eat garbage fast food and not let them become addicted to iPads/iPhones. It's actually HEALTHY and RESPONSIBLE. It's EASY to be a lazy ass parent who lets your kids be dullards who leave you alone while they're addicted to junk food, video games, iPads and whatever degeneracy and filth they can find online.

And then as a coping mechanism, you cling to the idea the kids raised better than yours will ACTUALLY turn out to be failures! I suspect you're the same trolls who obsessively post in the private school forum the same tired cliches about private school kids all being drug addicts.

Please point out where OP indicates that her children are addicted to junk food and screens, because I must have missed that part.

Moderation is key. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your experience reminded me of my disastrous visit with my sister who makes very different parenting choices than I do. Here’s my thread if you’re interested-you are not alone!!

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/973397.page

That was entertaining. Your sister is a hot mess. Made me glad to be an only child!

[Anonymous]

My sister is fanatical about food but in ways that are very confusing to me. Like she would NEVER ever let her kids eat fast food. Or anything not organic for that matter. But her kids at ages 4 and 6 drink 6-8 sippies of milk per day. And are continuously snacking on Lara bars. Like 3-5 per day. Is a hamburger from burner king really worse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

I think OP's sister was way out of line, but I would do the same thing anyway. Let them eat whatever you want when they are with you, sure, but not in front of them. And no screens outside of your cottage. It's not like it will hurt them to have a little less screen time -- they can play a game with their cousins or read a book or help make dinner or whatever together. But I'd do it because (1) less screen time is better anyway, (2) if they don't get a lot of time with their cousins, I'd rather they were spending time with them instead of glued to a screen anyway, and (3) I was raised that flaunting things in front of people who don't have them is unkind. The cousins can't help their parents' rules; show them a little grace by doing things they can participate in.

PP you replied to. You said it so much better!

Both of you- best comments on the thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

I think OP's sister was way out of line, but I would do the same thing anyway. Let them eat whatever you want when they are with you, sure, but not in front of them. And no screens outside of your cottage. It's not like it will hurt them to have a little less screen time -- they can play a game with their cousins or read a book or help make dinner or whatever together. But I'd do it because (1) less screen time is better anyway, (2) if they don't get a lot of time with their cousins, I'd rather they were spending time with them instead of glued to a screen anyway, and (3) I was raised that flaunting things in front of people who don't have them is unkind. The cousins can't help their parents' rules; show them a little grace by doing things they can participate in.

PP you replied to. You said it so much better!

Both of you- best comments on the thread.

DP. These two posts are the best of the whole thread.

Also, OP, this doesn't sound like an intervention so as I was reading I deducted points for your drama.

[Anonymous]

Line I use with my in-laws: "Thank you for your opinion, we'll take it under consideration." and then we don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I would be extra careful not to create envy in her poor children - so no pulling out of iPads, no walking in with fries, etc. It’s good for your kids to have a detox from all that, frankly. You don’t need to live like this all year - just when your families get together.

What? No, OP this is ridiculous.

You parent your way and tell sissy to mind her own business.

[Anonymous]

You all obviously have young kids. Wait until they’re teens having major growth spurts and burning a whole bunch of calories from sports every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not all children go bonkers when they see junk food. My children have it available at all times and they often pass on it. We have bags of Doritos sitting in front of everyone for days or weeks on end. Impossible, according to you.

Food is not a drug, that's just a metaphor of dubious utility. I don't judge people for trying to do best for their children. Honestly, I don't care. I am just telling what I am seeing. Which is that it largely does not work. Like, at all. The only child that I know where it kind of worked is, at 9, an obsessive health nut that all other children run away from.

I have a good friend who doesn't allow junk food and her kids absolutely feast at my house. They are teens so I don't get involved but it cracks me up.

[Anonymous]

Hmm...OP and her sister need to be taught some manners and grace. But, these are the kids their parents raised, no? Petty, self-centered, dysfunctional and inflexible. Celebrating 50 yrs of raising a crappy family . Yay! Congratulations!!

OP, go ahead and raise a stink. Your family will probably feel at home.

[Anonymous]

Let her be mad or disappointed or whatever she is feeling. Try to keep things on the “no” list for her kids in your cottage to keep the peace. I can’t imagine being so strict as a parent, but that’s her choice. If she brings it up again, tell her you are happy about your parenting decisions and don’t want to discuss it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of my friends’ kids whose parents are strict about their diet go completely bonkers when they see junk food. I had kids literally stuff their pocket with junk lying around our house unnoticed. The parents claims the child doesn’t like sweets only fruit, meanwhile the child is stuffing her pockets fill out airheads.

I think it’s upsetting to these people to see how much their children still want all that junk.

+1 We have a big unmonitored bowl of candy that my kid is welcome to eat. She rarely touches it, but if I don't hide it before her friends come over, they will devour it. I grew up in a no tv/no sugar household and as a result am not strict about that stuff.

This is also child dependent. One of my kids is not into candy, so candy out in the bowl lasts a long time. For her, moderation is inborn. The other, like me, loves candy, and eats through it much faster. For the second kid, I feel it's more my responsibility to instill moderation.