Catholic mom wants us to essentially say grace as part of our Jewish kid’s education ...

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your problem is that your mom was not born Jewish, but Catholic and it shows. You are embarrassed by this

Well, she is still your mother. You cannot change her now, not at this age.

And orthodox Jews believe you cannot be Jewish if your mother is not Jewish, hence this gentile custom has given you a new identity crisis.

This tells a lot about you and the community of people you live amongst.

Interesting

[Anonymous]

Admittedly, I haven’t read the entire thread, but I don’t understand the part about praying for the sick or other individual people during grace. That is not a Catholic thing or even a generally Christian thing. Grace before meals is simply supposed to be a prayer of thanks for the food given, not a time to offer up prayers for for general petitions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like your problem is that your mom was not born Jewish, but Catholic and it shows. You are embarrassed by this

Well, she is still your mother. You cannot change her now, not at this age.

And orthodox Jews believe you cannot be Jewish if your mother is not Jewish, hence this gentile custom has given you a new identity crisis.

This tells a lot about you and the community of people you live amongst.

Interesting

crawl back in your hole, please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Admittedly, I haven’t read the entire thread, but I don’t understand the part about praying for the sick or other individual people during grace. That is not a Catholic thing or even a generally Christian thing. Grace before meals is simply supposed to be a prayer of thanks for the food given, not a time to offer up prayers for for general petitions.

Mom is having a spiritual crisis and inflicting it on those around her. Doesn't sound like mom is doing the work she needs to do to figure out where she belongs, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m confused. Jews don’t give thanks to God for food?

we do, and we have our ways to do it. they don't involve asking God to fulfill a personal request. That isn't thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your mother has no say in your DD's religion. Tell her grace doesn't follow your religious beliefs and she needs to stop. Former christian protestant, current atheist here. We never said grace. I found it uncomfortable as a child when eating with catholics who said grace and we were all christian. It's understandable that you do not want your child to do this. Put your foot down.

That's why kids should be raised to feel comfortable with saying grace. In my experience most families say grace before a meal. I already posted, but OP's kids will come across this again and again in life. Why not help them feel comfortable with it? Why hex them with that discomfort?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have the right to raise your kids as you want, but technically you are actually not Jewish and neither are your children unless you converted when you married your husband.
In Judaism, the religion is passed from mother to children. So maybe this is where you mom is coming from as she sees (correctly) her grand kids as Christians.

No flame please, I am just pointing out the law.

Now if you want to raise your kids Jewish, I am sure you are aware of the prayer on "washing of hands" followed by the prayer on bread, both are said before eating a meal. And pretty much ANY food has to have a prayer BEFORE eating (haEtz, Hadama, ChaAhKol, ...). In fact, in Judaism, you actually recognize God in pretty much everything. The largest difference between Christianity and Judaism (without wanting to go into theological discussions) is that the God of Israel is unique (no man is or can become God -- nothing with trinity and virgin birth) AND the God of Israel is not into "turning your other cheek" stuff. That is very Christian.
But praying God to have given us what we eat, is not Christian per-se.

My mom absolutely does not consider her Christian. I can assure you of that.

The maternal line thing is only still in play in Orthodox congregations and some very strict Conservative ones. DH’s family is full of rabbis and strict Jews and they have said it’s an outdated thing that really very few non-Orthodox Jews take seriously anymore.

Citing some “law” that has no relevance in the 21st century is honestly just weird. Moreover you are in the minority (assuming you are a Conservative Jew):

The Ratner Center for the Study of Conservative Judaism conducted a survey of 1,617 members of 27 Conservative congregations in the U.S. and Canada in 1995.[116] 69% of respondents to the Ratner Center survey agreed that they would regard personally as a Jew anyone who was raised Jewish—even if their mother was Gentile and their father was Jewish.

Interesting
69% think being raised Jewish is enough. Why not 100%?
Are people being elitist? Obviously the percentage of people who accept a concert would be less
Wow

[Anonymous]

Your mom should host a family meal at her house once a week, and say grace then. Her house, her customs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have the right to raise your kids as you want, but technically you are actually not Jewish and neither are your children unless you converted when you married your husband.
In Judaism, the religion is passed from mother to children. So maybe this is where you mom is coming from as she sees (correctly) her grand kids as Christians.

No flame please, I am just pointing out the law.

Now if you want to raise your kids Jewish, I am sure you are aware of the prayer on "washing of hands" followed by the prayer on bread, both are said before eating a meal. And pretty much ANY food has to have a prayer BEFORE eating (haEtz, Hadama, ChaAhKol, ...). In fact, in Judaism, you actually recognize God in pretty much everything. The largest difference between Christianity and Judaism (without wanting to go into theological discussions) is that the God of Israel is unique (no man is or can become God -- nothing with trinity and virgin birth) AND the God of Israel is not into "turning your other cheek" stuff. That is very Christian.
But praying God to have given us what we eat, is not Christian per-se.

My mom absolutely does not consider her Christian. I can assure you of that.

The maternal line thing is only still in play in Orthodox congregations and some very strict Conservative ones. DH’s family is full of rabbis and strict Jews and they have said it’s an outdated thing that really very few non-Orthodox Jews take seriously anymore.

Citing some “law” that has no relevance in the 21st century is honestly just weird. Moreover you are in the minority (assuming you are a Conservative Jew):

The Ratner Center for the Study of Conservative Judaism conducted a survey of 1,617 members of 27 Conservative congregations in the U.S. and Canada in 1995.[116] 69% of respondents to the Ratner Center survey agreed that they would regard personally as a Jew anyone who was raised Jewish—even if their mother was Gentile and their father was Jewish.

Interesting
69% think being raised Jewish is enough. Why not 100%?
Are people being elitist? Obviously the percentage of people who accept a concert would be less
Wow

Many of us are fairly insular. I’m actually surprised it’s as high as it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your mom should host a family meal at her house once a week, and say grace then. Her house, her customs.

Yes
And find something else to fight about

[Anonymous]

There is no discrimination against Catholics. That is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is no discrimination against Catholics. That is ridiculous.

Your ignorance of American history is astounding. Google is your friend.

[Anonymous]

Consult a rabbi

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consult a rabbi

And call the police

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Consult a rabbi

And call the police

?