Why don’t my parents listen?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

[Anonymous]

1) It is completely ridiculous that they are coming. Ignore the guilt-tripper PP with her “family matters” bs. Even if they felt they needed to book something immediately and without reaching out again, the reasonable thing to do would have been to book for ANY OTHER WEEKEND. Instead they booked for the only weekend that they knew for a fact would be inconvenient for OP and that was already dedicated to the in-laws.

2) Send them an immediate itinerary of the weekend. Saturday they can hang out with whichever kid doesn’t have a party or tag along to a party or do breakfast beforehand. Sunday squeeze a meal in if you can, but once the religious obligations start, you are not available. Get them a hotel if possible since you don’t have time to host that weekend outside of the 2 time slots (One Saturday and one Sunday) that you listed. If that doesn’t work, weekend A B or C would all work better.

3) If they insist on coming anyway, stick to the itinerary. DO NOT let them tag along to the religious stuff and infringe upon your in-laws tine with the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

[Anonymous]

Just forewarn them that you are busy that weekend and won't be changing any of your plans.

Don't cancel anything. They will have to fit in around everything else.

If you leave them alone to amuse themselves perhaps next time they will organise a date that works for everyone, otherwise I'm sure they can find something else to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

Based on your posts here, even if this is true, they're still getting the short end of the stick. Please pass along my sympathies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

Based on your posts here, even if this is true, they're still getting the short end of the stick. Please pass along my sympathies.

I'm sorry that your insecurities lead you to be so defensive and rude. I'm sorry you don't have a strong and supportive family. But again, if your boss is more important and gets your best, rather than your family, sounds like you are the outlier.

[Anonymous]

How is your husband feeling about them insisting on coming when not invited?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

Heffa, i never mentioned my boss. But since you asked , I do great st my job and with my family. Those are two different skill sets and emotional accounts. You sound like an unemployed 12 yr old who got her ideas about family life from
A Rom-com or romance novel. Grow up.

[Anonymous]

So they come, whatever. Invite them go along when possible, offer the kids choices and that’s it. They will either confirm to the weekend plans and make the best of things for a nice visit, or have a awful time and learn to confirm plans and listen when you say you are busy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So they come, whatever. Invite them go along when possible, offer the kids choices and that’s it. They will either confirm to the weekend plans and make the best of things for a nice visit, or have a awful time and learn to confirm plans and listen when you say you are busy

I'm guessing if OP's parents do come, everyone is in for a miserable weekend. They aren't asking to be included in OP's plans, they believe OP should cancel her plans to spend time with them. They will be displeased and they will send the weekend letting OP know they're displeased.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

You just sound silly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great.

Based on your posts here, even if this is true, they're still getting the short end of the stick. Please pass along my sympathies.

I'm sorry that your insecurities lead you to be so defensive and rude. I'm sorry you don't have a strong and supportive family. But again, if your boss is more important and gets your best, rather than your family, sounds like you are the outlier.

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great. [/quote

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Oh, see, I love and respect my family. My family comes first, to me. This isn't forced or demanded; but I feel and believe that family should get the very best of me, not what's left over after work and everyday life.

Anyway, at the very least, I'd be calling or texting to check in: "Sorry, I'm still working on getting you dates--there is a possibility that I'll be going to Boston for a work conference, so I need to firm that up. I'll be in touch with an update tomorrow."

Your holier than thou, people have to as I do or they are not loving attitude is arrogant, stupid and shows zero understanding of differing personalities and communication styles, And family dynamics . You think you are better than, But you come off as immature and ridiculous.

I'm sorry your family dynamics are such that your boss is more important to you than your family, but for many of us, that's not the case. I think you are the outlier, and should recognize your perspective as such.

My family gets the best of me, not what's leftover from work and daily life. If that's not true for you, great. [/quote

+1

You’re a nut.