I’m so freaking tired of parents with 3+ kids complaining

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess what I don't understand about the complainers is - how did you not realize it was going to be like this?

Each child is a lot of work. They have needs that must be met. Obviously. Any parent of one knows this. Multiply by 3 or 4 and yeah, it gets a lot harder each time you add to your family. There is way more juggling that needs to be done between only 2 parents.

What did you think it was going to be like?

This is coming from a mom of 4 who never complains.

I honestly don't buy this bull. Maybe you don't complain on DCUM, but I bet you anything you've bitched to your husband/mom/best friend at SOME point in your parenting life about the misery of parenting. Please STHU.

NOPE

In fact, the complainers are the ones who should STFU. No one cares about your petty problems. They're boring AF.

How do people not get this?

"Oh my baby makes it soooo hard to go to the pool, we can't stay all day like I (stupidly) envisioned." Duh? You have a 5 month old. Of course you can't stay all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:s/o from the pool life thread. But it extends everywhere. You had three kids by choice. You knew what the repercussions would be for your kids and yourselves. Not as many activities, harder in public places in the younger years etc. You can’t make the defining soccer game because one parent has to travel and you don’t arrange backup? Then don’t sign up for the team, and don’t complain when the coach only selects the “committed” players to move up. It’s your kids that are suffering. Either manage it or don’t but stop complaining about your own choices. Rant over.

No. People don't know what they're getting into when they have kids, much less when they have three or more kids. The lack of knowing what lies ahead doesn't give them permission to whine, but it's important to admit that nobody knows the "repercussions" of having kids until they have them. At least admit that part.

of course they do unless they are having triplets

If you have one kid, it's pretty easy to envision what it will be like to have two and then so on and so forth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:s/o from the pool life thread. But it extends everywhere. You had three kids by choice. You knew what the repercussions would be for your kids and yourselves. Not as many activities, harder in public places in the younger years etc. You can’t make the defining soccer game because one parent has to travel and you don’t arrange backup? Then don’t sign up for the team, and don’t complain when the coach only selects the “committed” players to move up. It’s your kids that are suffering. Either manage it or don’t but stop complaining about your own choices. Rant over.

No. People don't know what they're getting into when they have kids, much less when they have three or more kids. The lack of knowing what lies ahead doesn't give them permission to whine, but it's important to admit that nobody knows the "repercussions" of having kids until they have them. At least admit that part.

of course they do unless they are having triplets

If you have one kid, it's pretty easy to envision what it will be like to have two and then so on and so forth

NP, but I disagree. Many parents don't think about the multiplier effect in adding kids. You're not just parenting each kid individually, you have to consider the dynamics between them. I have three and love it and don't really complain because I know I'm lucky. Creating a whole thread to complain about the complainers, OTOH, is pretty special.

[Anonymous]

the person on the pool thread did not complain about having 3 kids. she just had an unrealistic idea of how much time she was supposed to enjoy at the pool and was looking for tips from families who successfully spend more time there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:this is such bizarre logic to me. Can no one complain, in this case? When a mom of 1, a newborn, complains that she is tired, is your response "well, YOU chose to have a baby. Either manage it or don't but stop complaining about your choices. You knew what the repercussions would be." When someone says "oh my gosh it's so hot out" is your response "either managing living in a hot city or don't but stop complaining about your own choices."

Yes, I do. I do not give a damn if you're sleep deprived because every person who has ever had a baby has been sleep deprived. Also, not a single member of your family owes you free child care, house cleaning, or cooking your bloody meals. As for hot summers, absolutely every building is air conditioned. Turn on yours!

NP and your lack of empathy makes me think you're the same troll who is always berating new moms for having the audacity to ask for support. I actually think it's really helpful to know when a friend or colleague isn't sleeping well because I've been there and I know how hard it is. After reading your grumpy post, I'm especially grateful that I work with people who support each other!

No one gives AF about you or your brats

Sorry grumpy troll. While you have chosen to live in a lonely, bitter world, most of us have built loving networks of friends and family.

NP. I have a lot of friends and family but I realize that my children are my responsibility and I never ask for favors except in an emergency or pawn them off on people.

Feel free to be a user but realize that your friends and family realize it.

How did you misconstrue being part of a supportive network for being a user? As I said previously, I empathize with and help a lot of friends and family. That's part of building relationships...not just using people. Why are ya'll so cynical?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:s/o from the pool life thread. But it extends everywhere. You had three kids by choice. You knew what the repercussions would be for your kids and yourselves. Not as many activities, harder in public places in the younger years etc. You can’t make the defining soccer game because one parent has to travel and you don’t arrange backup? Then don’t sign up for the team, and don’t complain when the coach only selects the “committed” players to move up. It’s your kids that are suffering. Either manage it or don’t but stop complaining about your own choices. Rant over.

No. People don't know what they're getting into when they have kids, much less when they have three or more kids. The lack of knowing what lies ahead doesn't give them permission to whine, but it's important to admit that nobody knows the "repercussions" of having kids until they have them. At least admit that part.

of course they do unless they are having triplets

If you have one kid, it's pretty easy to envision what it will be like to have two and then so on and so forth

I am not sure that when you have a one year old and a three year old, you are thinking about needing to carpool to a soccer game when the kids are 9, 11, and 13.

[Anonymous]

Help me understand the difference between friends or acquaintances who share details of their lives with you, particularly if they are busy with a lot of school/outside activities and driving obligations. When is it no longer “sharing” and becomes whining? I think you may be interpreting it as whining when the other parent is just sharing/confiding in you.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if the people who start these threads are struggling with infertility or weren’t able to have as many children as they wanted. It doesn’t make sense to me to get mad at someone for complaining about what they have unless it was something you wanted for yourself.

Also, they make it sound like pregnancy is always a well-thought out plan where all of the pros and cons were weighed. Certainly it often is that way, but sometimes it’s just getting a little too drunk at the backyard bbq. I know I gave more thought to taking my last job than I did to conceiving my third child, and I ended up leaving that job after a couple of years, but I am stuck with this little boy for life .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ha I posted a different vent recently about 3 kids and all their activities. I’m a SAHM and have a part time sitter. DH actually suggested I get full time help. I don’t need full time help. It is still a shit show getting kid(s) to sports in the middle of rush hour. I think the worst part is that we live in a highly congested traffic area. If everything were 5 minutes away, it would be fine. We have to drive 2-3 miles and it often takes 30+ minutes smack in the middle of dinner time.

Now my kids have camps and my toddler naps when they need to get picked up. I’m sure my toddler will survive getting her nap cut short.

I don’t mean to come off like I’m complaining. I also complain about traffic, heat, etc. I’m not trying to one up anyone about the number of kids and activities. I’m sure I would complain if I had one kid and had to drive in rush hour to sports too.

Full time help and being a SAHM?! Smh.

She has 3 kids... you cannot expect her to do it alone. She probably also has a housekeeper and yard service. Between mom, dad, and nanny you'd think they could figure it out. And, she probably has poor toddler in no activities so how hard can it be.

Don’t be bitter ladies. You should have chosen husbands who make more money.

+ 1

We have plenty of money, I just don’t understand how a SAHM could possibly need full time help....unless the Mom is completely helpless. Maybe the husbands should have chosen more capable wives?

Pp here. For the record, I declined full time help. I do know SAHMs who have full time help. It isn’t like you hand off all the kids full time. You leave baby home so you can go to older kid’s school, take middle kid to dance without lugging other 2. Sure, you can have a little break to work out or get your nails done but it isn’t like you go hang out by yourself all day.

I do have a pt sitter and pt housekeeper. I still get my kids going in the morning, take my youngest to her activities when big kids are at school and then take older kids to activities after school and weekends. I usually work out twice a week, run an errand and either get a mani pedi or massage once per week so half sitter hours are for me and other half is so I can take other kids out without dragging youngest.

DH suggested I get help everyday vs the 2 I have now. I declined.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:this is such bizarre logic to me. Can no one complain, in this case? When a mom of 1, a newborn, complains that she is tired, is your response "well, YOU chose to have a baby. Either manage it or don't but stop complaining about your choices. You knew what the repercussions would be." When someone says "oh my gosh it's so hot out" is your response "either managing living in a hot city or don't but stop complaining about your own choices."

Yes, I do. I do not give a damn if you're sleep deprived because every person who has ever had a baby has been sleep deprived. Also, not a single member of your family owes you free child care, house cleaning, or cooking your bloody meals. As for hot summers, absolutely every building is air conditioned. Turn on yours!

NP and your lack of empathy makes me think you're the same troll who is always berating new moms for having the audacity to ask for support. I actually think it's really helpful to know when a friend or colleague isn't sleeping well because I've been there and I know how hard it is. After reading your grumpy post, I'm especially grateful that I work with people who support each other!

No one gives AF about you or your brats

Sorry grumpy troll. While you have chosen to live in a lonely, bitter world, most of us have built loving networks of friends and family.

NP. I have a lot of friends and family but I realize that my children are my responsibility and I never ask for favors except in an emergency or pawn them off on people.

Feel free to be a user but realize that your friends and family realize it.

How did you misconstrue being part of a supportive network for being a user? As I said previously, I empathize with and help a lot of friends and family. That's part of building relationships...not just using people. Why are ya'll so cynical?

This is a misnomer. If the mom with three NEEDS my support so badly, am I really going to call her to help with my kids? Probably not. You are a user, own it.

I hire help. I own the fact that I have multiple kids and it makes logistics more difficult and expensive. I chose to have each of my kids with that understanding. It is not a “supportive network’s” responsibility to help me out. It’s not my responsibility to carry them either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:this is such bizarre logic to me. Can no one complain, in this case? When a mom of 1, a newborn, complains that she is tired, is your response "well, YOU chose to have a baby. Either manage it or don't but stop complaining about your choices. You knew what the repercussions would be." When someone says "oh my gosh it's so hot out" is your response "either managing living in a hot city or don't but stop complaining about your own choices."

Yes, I do. I do not give a damn if you're sleep deprived because every person who has ever had a baby has been sleep deprived. Also, not a single member of your family owes you free child care, house cleaning, or cooking your bloody meals. As for hot summers, absolutely every building is air conditioned. Turn on yours!

NP and your lack of empathy makes me think you're the same troll who is always berating new moms for having the audacity to ask for support. I actually think it's really helpful to know when a friend or colleague isn't sleeping well because I've been there and I know how hard it is. After reading your grumpy post, I'm especially grateful that I work with people who support each other!

No one gives AF about you or your brats

Sorry grumpy troll. While you have chosen to live in a lonely, bitter world, most of us have built loving networks of friends and family.

NP. I have a lot of friends and family but I realize that my children are my responsibility and I never ask for favors except in an emergency or pawn them off on people.

Feel free to be a user but realize that your friends and family realize it.

How did you misconstrue being part of a supportive network for being a user? As I said previously, I empathize with and help a lot of friends and family. That's part of building relationships...not just using people. Why are ya'll so cynical?

"Supportive network" my ass. My cousin has 4; I have 2. She has taken one of my children for one play date one time. I have taken various iterations of her kids multiple, multiple times. I have taken various iterations of her kids overnight. I have taken them to the movies. I have sat with them at family events/taken one or two out with me. Etc., etc.

SUPPORT is a two-way street. When it's not back and forth, it's just taking. Own it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m tired of parents complaining in general.

I’m tired of people complaining about complaining. We all complain. Stop picking on parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids and never thought it was hard.

Complainers are just weak willed people whose lives are a perpetual hot mess.

Aren’t you just perfect? Everyone complains. People who claim they don’t, are lying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ha I posted a different vent recently about 3 kids and all their activities. I’m a SAHM and have a part time sitter. DH actually suggested I get full time help. I don’t need full time help. It is still a shit show getting kid(s) to sports in the middle of rush hour. I think the worst part is that we live in a highly congested traffic area. If everything were 5 minutes away, it would be fine. We have to drive 2-3 miles and it often takes 30+ minutes smack in the middle of dinner time.

Now my kids have camps and my toddler naps when they need to get picked up. I’m sure my toddler will survive getting her nap cut short.

I don’t mean to come off like I’m complaining. I also complain about traffic, heat, etc. I’m not trying to one up anyone about the number of kids and activities. I’m sure I would complain if I had one kid and had to drive in rush hour to sports too.

Full time help and being a SAHM?! Smh.

She has 3 kids... you cannot expect her to do it alone. She probably also has a housekeeper and yard service. Between mom, dad, and nanny you'd think they could figure it out. And, she probably has poor toddler in no activities so how hard can it be.

Don’t be bitter ladies. You should have chosen husbands who make more money.

+ 1

We have plenty of money, I just don’t understand how a SAHM could possibly need full time help....unless the Mom is completely helpless. Maybe the husbands should have chosen more capable wives?

If you want to be a martyr, go ahead. There’s nothing wrong with having help. Women have had help for centuries until they were told they weren’t ‘capable enough’. You’re the type who only feels good if she puts other women down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:this is such bizarre logic to me. Can no one complain, in this case? When a mom of 1, a newborn, complains that she is tired, is your response "well, YOU chose to have a baby. Either manage it or don't but stop complaining about your choices. You knew what the repercussions would be." When someone says "oh my gosh it's so hot out" is your response "either managing living in a hot city or don't but stop complaining about your own choices."

Yes, I do. I do not give a damn if you're sleep deprived because every person who has ever had a baby has been sleep deprived. Also, not a single member of your family owes you free child care, house cleaning, or cooking your bloody meals. As for hot summers, absolutely every building is air conditioned. Turn on yours!

Off your meds again?