Is it really that hard for women in their 30's to date?

[Anonymous]

There's really no such thing as an attractive woman who can't find a man.

[Anonymous]

Many people in their 30s are tired of all the BS dating really is. They are old enough to see through the facade, and it's demoralizing LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Add to that that men in their mid-late 30s and are single/childless usually are in that predicament because they have Peter Pan Syndrome and don't particularly want to settle down and have kids or they're just total duds nobody else wanted, and there you have it.

Peter Pan Syndrome? I laffed.

We just don't want to get married. But you don't figure that out until you're making the walk of shame from the Metro back to your apt.

Peter Pan syndrome also applies to women in their 30's...only its Prince Charming syndrome. Mr big is going to sweep me off my feet and I will be a sahm working on a book or painting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single 39 year old here.

I've been looking to get married since I was 25. I am decent looking, thin, in ok shape, etc. Its not because I am too picky or becasue I don't want to get married to becasue I focused on my career. It's just really really hard to meet guys.

I don't think you're being fully honest and this is 90% of the problem. You have to confront that it is probably something off-putting about your appearance or personality that is causing these difficulties for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
"Thin" and "in great shape" are not synonyms. At all.

For heterosexual guys they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Please, I'm married so I don't have to trifle with your lame asses anymore. But see how hard you're laffing when you're 43, never been married, and now the cute young girls won't mess with you and you're still in your apartment, alone, with no family like the respectable men have.

Yes, because all 43 y/o married men remain in their original marriages with families intact. Idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many people in their 30s are tired of all the BS dating really is. They are old enough to see through the facade, and it's demoralizing LOL

Yep. That's why I call when I want to have sex and when I'm done, you go back to your place and I go back to men.

Both of us win!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single 39 year old here.

I've been looking to get married since I was 25. I am decent looking, thin, in ok shape, etc. Its not because I am too picky or becasue I don't want to get married to becasue I focused on my career. It's just really really hard to meet guys.

I don't think you're being fully honest and this is 90% of the problem. You have to confront that it is probably something off-putting about your appearance or personality that is causing these difficulties for you.

Something that off-putting would be difficult not to notice, no matter how self-unaware a person may be.

PP, sometimes it is not in the cards. Like many other things. Embrace your lifestyle or face years of depression. I'm afraid these are the most realistic choices at this point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I don't think you're being fully honest and this is 90% of the problem. You have to confront that it is probably something off-putting about your appearance or personality that is causing these difficulties for you.

Yep

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single 39 year old here.

I've been looking to get married since I was 25. I am decent looking, thin, in ok shape, etc. Its not because I am too picky or becasue I don't want to get married to becasue I focused on my career. It's just really really hard to meet guys.

I don't think you're being fully honest and this is 90% of the problem. You have to confront that it is probably something off-putting about your appearance or personality that is causing these difficulties for you.

I've dated plenty. Been in several long term relationships with several men who wanted to marry me. They just weren't the right fit, for valid reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They just weren't the right fit, for valid reasons.

Sounds like you're too picky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They just weren't the right fit, for valid reasons.

Sounds like you're too picky.

I agree. Unless PP wants to share something agregious, I think she's been picking too long.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Speaking as a woman who actually is single and a mom, I date pretty often. Sure, my ex is still in the pic but I also have support from family. I would highly suggest finding a regular baby sitter for a single woman by choice if family is not an option or moving back to your hometown, if the move would be a net positive overall.

Dating is hard for the first year or two and you might find that you're not interested in dating at that point. But after? I really haven't find dating to be any worse for me vs childless friends. All of my single mom friends are married/remarried now. Yes, you will have to find creative ways to date and keep yourself up, but it's worth it if you want to find a great guy. I'm not a completely self-sacrificing mom and I make zero apologies for it. I'm not raising my daughter to believe that her personal life ends as soon as she becomes a parent. I don't know of any men who develop this attitude, married or divorced.

Going it alone doesn't have to be a death sentence to your dating life.

+1 and what a great post. This was nearly my exact story. I met many terrific (yes, hot, sexy and beautiful) women - single moms - in the 3 years I was dating post-divorce. And I only dated women 35+ - they actually had "it". I was fortunate to have met one amazing single mom (who was 38 years old) and we are now very happily re-married and raising a terrific blended family.

Good luck OP.

[Anonymous]

Dating was not difficult for me in my 30s.

I do not consider myself more than average looks, though I have lots of other great qualities. I didn't have any expectations for a match, not even level of education, and waited until I could enjoy dating before doing so. I had a pleasant experience and within six months had met my DH.

I think a lot of it depends on why you're single in your 30s - there are plenty of valid reasons but it could also be having expectations too outrageous or being difficult to be a partner too - and whether you're happily dating or dating from a place of fear or desperation. If you're open to meeting a variety of people, dating shouldn't be too difficult.

[Anonymous]

*to not too