Husband pressuring me to quit job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much are you complaining about your job?

Almost daily. I know that’s bad but I’m exhausted. I’m 19 weeks pregnant and my patience to handle my job is much harder on me. I’m physically, mentally, and emotionally tired.

It's ok to complain, but it's not ok to do it daily. He is trying to help you because you keep complaining but you are doing nothing to improve the situation.
If there is nothing you want to do to change the situation, stop complaining. Suck it up.

He brings up the subject even when I don’t say anything. It’s become a daily thing. He asks me how my day went. I tell him. He tells me what will solve my stressful work. He again tells me how I should quit and just stay home while he’s massaging me or rubbing my feet. I want to keep my independence as long as possible, but he tells me how worried about he is for me.

Because you’re acting insane. Also, 19 weeks pregnant is the sweet spot. The second trimester EASY for the vast majority of women. God help your poor husband when you’re 37 weeks.

And you are definitely giving mommy martyr vibes, btw.

19 weeks hasn’t been so sweet for me. I have a lot of aches and pains, heartburn, and still dealing with nausea and food issues.

I work in an oncology office with sick people. It’s very emotionally taxing watching sickness each day. I had a really rough last week when one of our beloved patients took a sudden turn for the worse. It’s been really hard now that I’m super emotional.

Wait is your “complaining” mentioning that a patient worsened? If so he really sucks.

Last week I had a hard week and cried when I got home. It was super emotional for me. He just told me to quit so I don’t have to put myself through that. No real support or empathy.

Your story has changed at least 3 times about what type of complaining you do.

No. You just can’t read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford to quit your job?
Share less with him or
Find a new job..

Yes. We have plenty of savings and he makes majority of our money. We have side investments.

My husband always wanted a wife that stayed home. He wanted me to quit work once we married. He accepted that I wanted to work. I feel like now is his time to push for me to be home.

Yeah, that's a bit scary, to be honest. If he wanted a stay at home wife, he shouldn't have married someone who wants to work, and he needs to accept that you aren't going to change that.

Actually this makes perfect sense. OP doesn’t want to work, but she doesn’t want to take ownership of the fact that she doesn’t want to work, so she deliberately married a guy who wants a SAHM and she is deliberately goading him into “pressuring” her to quit her job. Then when she inevitably quits she can pretend that she is an independent #girlboss at heart and her controlling husband *made* her quit.

And I don’t do the stupid girl boss stuff. So pathetic and weird.

So in this creative writing project why did YOU marry HIM?

There is no creative writing project. People on here are weird and crazy judgmental.

I married him because I loved. All marriages are give and take and realizing what you will put up with or you’re willing to look past. He looked past wanting a wife that stays home and married me. I looked past stuff about him because I loved him enough that those things didn’t matter to me.

Keep us posted

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much are you complaining about your job?

Almost daily. I know that’s bad but I’m exhausted. I’m 19 weeks pregnant and my patience to handle my job is much harder on me. I’m physically, mentally, and emotionally tired.

It's ok to complain, but it's not ok to do it daily. He is trying to help you because you keep complaining but you are doing nothing to improve the situation.
If there is nothing you want to do to change the situation, stop complaining. Suck it up.

He brings up the subject even when I don’t say anything. It’s become a daily thing. He asks me how my day went. I tell him. He tells me what will solve my stressful work. He again tells me how I should quit and just stay home while he’s massaging me or rubbing my feet. I want to keep my independence as long as possible, but he tells me how worried about he is for me.

Because you’re acting insane. Also, 19 weeks pregnant is the sweet spot. The second trimester EASY for the vast majority of women. God help your poor husband when you’re 37 weeks.

And you are definitely giving mommy martyr vibes, btw.

19 weeks hasn’t been so sweet for me. I have a lot of aches and pains, heartburn, and still dealing with nausea and food issues.

I work in an oncology office with sick people. It’s very emotionally taxing watching sickness each day. I had a really rough last week when one of our beloved patients took a sudden turn for the worse. It’s been really hard now that I’m super emotional.

Wait is your “complaining” mentioning that a patient worsened? If so he really sucks.

Last week I had a hard week and cried when I got home. It was super emotional for me. He just told me to quit so I don’t have to put myself through that. No real support or empathy.

Your story has changed at least 3 times about what type of complaining you do.

No. You just can’t read.

It went from you complaining almost every day about how emotionally and physically tired and stressed you are to DH just asking you how your day was and you saying "stressful" to now it just being a one off bad week. You come off worse and worse with every post you make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford to quit your job?
Share less with him or
Find a new job..

Yes. We have plenty of savings and he makes majority of our money. We have side investments.

My husband always wanted a wife that stayed home. He wanted me to quit work once we married. He accepted that I wanted to work. I feel like now is his time to push for me to be home.

Hahahah I guarantee you will be a SAHM within a year of the baby’s arrival. His new pressuring tactic will be to do nothing and make you do everything.

Or maybe her husband will tell her to give the baby up for adoption if she complains for five minutes.

Who knows?

You guys are wild and crazy with your delusional and self limited theories. My husband would never suggest giving our child up for adoption.

Pp here. I was joking.
It seems silly to me that if someone complains about something, your only options are to be some kind of punching bag or to suggest they “shoot the dog” so to speak.

I can think of twenty things I would tell a friend or my spouse to do if they complained about their job, and none of them are to suck it up or just quit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much are you complaining about your job?

Almost daily. I know that’s bad but I’m exhausted. I’m 19 weeks pregnant and my patience to handle my job is much harder on me. I’m physically, mentally, and emotionally tired.

It's ok to complain, but it's not ok to do it daily. He is trying to help you because you keep complaining but you are doing nothing to improve the situation.
If there is nothing you want to do to change the situation, stop complaining. Suck it up.

He brings up the subject even when I don’t say anything. It’s become a daily thing. He asks me how my day went. I tell him. He tells me what will solve my stressful work. He again tells me how I should quit and just stay home while he’s massaging me or rubbing my feet. I want to keep my independence as long as possible, but he tells me how worried about he is for me.

Because you’re acting insane. Also, 19 weeks pregnant is the sweet spot. The second trimester EASY for the vast majority of women. God help your poor husband when you’re 37 weeks.

And you are definitely giving mommy martyr vibes, btw.

19 weeks hasn’t been so sweet for me. I have a lot of aches and pains, heartburn, and still dealing with nausea and food issues.

I work in an oncology office with sick people. It’s very emotionally taxing watching sickness each day. I had a really rough last week when one of our beloved patients took a sudden turn for the worse. It’s been really hard now that I’m super emotional.

Wait is your “complaining” mentioning that a patient worsened? If so he really sucks.

Last week I had a hard week and cried when I got home. It was super emotional for me. He just told me to quit so I don’t have to put myself through that. No real support or empathy.

Your story has changed at least 3 times about what type of complaining you do.

No. You just can’t read.

It went from you complaining almost every day about how emotionally and physically tired and stressed you are to DH just asking you how your day was and you saying "stressful" to now it just being a one off bad week. You come off worse and worse with every post you make.

This isn’t what op said at all. She said she was complaining and explained more that she complains only after she is asked how her day went. She never once said she had a one off bad week. She explained really rough week that was emotional for her and how he offered her no empathy or support. You need reading comprehension if you can’t follow this.

[Anonymous]

You are lucky to have a husband who prioritizes your mental well being. I'd quit if you can get a new job or save money staying home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much are you complaining about your job?

Almost daily. I know that’s bad but I’m exhausted. I’m 19 weeks pregnant and my patience to handle my job is much harder on me. I’m physically, mentally, and emotionally tired.

It's ok to complain, but it's not ok to do it daily. He is trying to help you because you keep complaining but you are doing nothing to improve the situation.
If there is nothing you want to do to change the situation, stop complaining. Suck it up.

He brings up the subject even when I don’t say anything. It’s become a daily thing. He asks me how my day went. I tell him. He tells me what will solve my stressful work. He again tells me how I should quit and just stay home while he’s massaging me or rubbing my feet. I want to keep my independence as long as possible, but he tells me how worried about he is for me.

Because you’re acting insane. Also, 19 weeks pregnant is the sweet spot. The second trimester EASY for the vast majority of women. God help your poor husband when you’re 37 weeks.

And you are definitely giving mommy martyr vibes, btw.

19 weeks hasn’t been so sweet for me. I have a lot of aches and pains, heartburn, and still dealing with nausea and food issues.

I work in an oncology office with sick people. It’s very emotionally taxing watching sickness each day. I had a really rough last week when one of our beloved patients took a sudden turn for the worse. It’s been really hard now that I’m super emotional.

Wait is your “complaining” mentioning that a patient worsened? If so he really sucks.

Last week I had a hard week and cried when I got home. It was super emotional for me. He just told me to quit so I don’t have to put myself through that. No real support or empathy.

Your story has changed at least 3 times about what type of complaining you do.

No. You just can’t read.

It went from you complaining almost every day about how emotionally and physically tired and stressed you are to DH just asking you how your day was and you saying "stressful" to now it just being a one off bad week. You come off worse and worse with every post you make.

This isn’t what op said at all. She said she was complaining and explained more that she complains only after she is asked how her day went. She never once said she had a one off bad week. She explained really rough week that was emotional for her and how he offered her no empathy or support. You need reading comprehension if you can’t follow this.

It’s weird how OP is old enough to married and pregnant but completely unfamiliar with the word “fine.”

“How was your day, honey?”
“Fine, how was yours?”

Her husband asking about her day doesn’t obligate her to complain about it. But OP is painfully stupid, so she won’t understand this.

[Anonymous]

This is super easy to fix. I’m a complainer and have the same issue with my H.

I just say “I need to complain. I don’t want solutions, I just want you to listen and be empathetic. Don’t try to fix it”

Then I complain for 20 minutes and I’m done. We have e the boundary I can only complain for 20 minutes or else I’ll complain all night long.

[Anonymous]

Always comes back to the Nail
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg

[Anonymous]

You sound like my wife. Maybe do some self reflection and ask yourself why you are torturing and not only making your life miserable but his. He is trying to guide you toward sanity. This is about you not working, it’s about you voluntarily harming yourself and your marriage. Would you sit idly by and watch your husband harm himself? Maybe he loves you a cares about you. He may not be saying that but I can almost guarantee you that is where he is coming from.

FYI nothing is going to change or get better about the job. Stop expecting pushing on expecting it to get better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Always comes back to the Nail
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg

I never understood this video. If there is a simple and obvious solution to my problem that I can’t see, then of course I want to hear about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound like my wife. Maybe do some self reflection and ask yourself why you are torturing and not only making your life miserable but his. He is trying to guide you toward sanity. This is about you not working, it’s about you voluntarily harming yourself and your marriage. Would you sit idly by and watch your husband harm himself? Maybe he loves you a cares about you. He may not be saying that but I can almost guarantee you that is where he is coming from.

FYI nothing is going to change or get better about the job. Stop expecting pushing on expecting it to get better.

Is this what you would tell a friend who complained about his job?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford to quit your job?
Share less with him or
Find a new job..

Yes. We have plenty of savings and he makes majority of our money. We have side investments.

My husband always wanted a wife that stayed home. He wanted me to quit work once we married. He accepted that I wanted to work. I feel like now is his time to push for me to be home.

Hahahah I guarantee you will be a SAHM within a year of the baby’s arrival. His new pressuring tactic will be to do nothing and make you do everything.

Or maybe her husband will tell her to give the baby up for adoption if she complains for five minutes.

Who knows?

You guys are wild and crazy with your delusional and self limited theories. My husband would never suggest giving our child up for adoption.

Pp here. I was joking.
It seems silly to me that if someone complains about something, your only options are to be some kind of punching bag or to suggest they “shoot the dog” so to speak.

I can think of twenty things I would tell a friend or my spouse to do if they complained about their job, and none of them are to suck it up or just quit.

But after you discussed the 20 things and they refuse to do them or did them and nothing was better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you knew he wanted you to be a SAHM. What did you think was going to happen when you started whining about your job? You sound very dim.

He chose to date and marry me. Relationships are a give and take.

This answer reveals your personality. You are always deflecting and not taking responsibility. YOU chose to date and marry him, unless you are telling us this was a forced marriage.

[Anonymous]

OP, you are very lucky to work because you want to and not because you need to.
Do you really love that job so much? A job that causes you so much stress that you are always complaining when you are asked about your day at work? Are you really happy with that job?

Because you don’t have to work, you have the luxury to work just for fun. You can find a better job that is less stressful and make you happier.

Or maybe you enjoy the drama of being tortured at work.