How do you get over jealousy, when your child is the only one not going to a top college?

Anonymous
I'm a bit envious that DC's friends can pick a college without worrying about cost and can ED without pause.
Anonymous
Get on dcum & hop on multiple threads bad-talking all the schools that rejected my kid & let in their “lesser” classmates. JK

Look back for only a split-second & assess if anything could have been done differently. Learn from that. Move fwd, don’t look back. Be grateful & excited for all the new experiences & opportunities ahead at whatever school your child ends up attending. Can have a successful fantastic time & life from most any school.


Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:In a year kids will be talking about who dropped out, burnt out, pwho transferred, who got a summer job…it’s not the golden ticket you think it is and will be a mostly hollow victory in four years. All that really matters is their major, internships, and hustle.

So true!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:People please. This is so fake. Besides as many have pointed out that mostly only private ED acceptances know where they are going, most of the state flagships have not announced yet.


I don’t think people get jealous of state schools.
Anonymous
The best way to get over this is to get yourself a life, sweetie pie. Find a hobby!! You'll need one when buddy boy goes to college anyway.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm a bit envious that DC's friends can pick a college without worrying about cost and can ED without pause.


Same! Between finances and my 2e kid needing a cooperative environment, we are not chasing any T150 schools. He has a 1500, 11 APs (all 5s so far), 4.5 in FCPS.
Anonymous
Give it a few months. No one will care where kids go. It’s a moment where everyone wants to show off. Your kid will be fine and so will you.
Anonymous
Have another kid.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm a bit envious that DC's friends can pick a college without worrying about cost and can ED without pause.

Same.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm a bit envious that DC's friends can pick a college without worrying about cost and can ED without pause.

Same.


+1. No ED for us but DS is going well with EA so far.
Anonymous
^ doing well
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Give it a few months. No one will care where kids go. It’s a moment where everyone wants to show off. Your kid will be fine and so will you.


This is such a negative response. College is where you will spend the next four years, where you make lifelong friendships, where you may meet your spouse. It is not just to show off.

I often have this feeling that people are not happy for me. I don’t want to say they are jealous but they don’t seem happy for my wins.
Anonymous
Yep, being a bad mom, sore loser. In our circle all the kids did exceptional but mine, of course we have ADD going for us. I don't show it to my son but it's eating me up alive.


So you were operating under some delusion that your son would have "exceptional" results like your "circle" despite having a less impressive academic transcript? (I assume that's why you brought up the ADHD). If so, thats on you.

I hope you allowed him to apply to schools that are a good fit and he has somewhere to go even if it's embarrassing for you.

I knew by 8th grade that my kid was not going to be headed off to a highly selective college and so did he. That didn't prevent us from being happy for his friends who were able to jump through all the hoops and get an acceptance. He has ADHD, but so do some of his friends with "better" results - they are all still individuals with their own interests, priorities, personalities, motivations, strengths and weaknesses. I didn't have any jealousy to get over. I have a great kid who is who he is.



Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Give it a few months. No one will care where kids go. It’s a moment where everyone wants to show off. Your kid will be fine and so will you.


This is such a negative response. College is where you will spend the next four years, where you make lifelong friendships, where you may meet your spouse. It is not just to show off.

I often have this feeling that people are not happy for me. I don’t want to say they are jealous but they don’t seem happy for my wins.


It is not negative. It is the truth.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Give it a few months. No one will care where kids go. It’s a moment where everyone wants to show off. Your kid will be fine and so will you.


This is such a negative response. College is where you will spend the next four years, where you make lifelong friendships, where you may meet your spouse. It is not just to show off.

I often have this feeling that people are not happy for me. I don’t want to say they are jealous but they don’t seem happy for my wins.


DP but there’s nothing negative about it at all. Sorry you want people to dwell on where your kid goes to college long after the fact? Seems very self-centered.
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