Being sober is boring as hell

[Anonymous]

Can you take on more projects at work? Perhaps attend or speak at a conference in your field? When I gave up drinking I remember feeling this way and then I got involved with this huge initiative at my company. It took a lot of time and occupied a lot of hours I used to fill with drinking. By the time the project was complete, I was no longer feeling the loss of the alcohol and enjoyed having some free time.

In my case, by then it was just about spring and I decided to make a vegetable garden in my yard and dove head first into that project which occupied a ton of my time. So I guess my advice is to find some projects to obsess over, haha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP feeling like you need alcohol in order to not be bored fades over time. That's the alcoholism talking. By one month, that had faded a lot into the background.

As someone who just did this - I totally agree!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree your GI issues are likely alcohol related. I wish someone had told my mom that five years ago.

I like seltzer water with fresh lime. Or water with lime. More than just one wedge, a good pour of lime juice.

You could also try gummies. Then you won't be bored.

THC gummies? Those are way worse than alcohol, do not even go there.

They are in no way “way worse” than alcohol. The body is equipped with an endocannabinoid system. Alcohol is just a neurotoxin (and a carcinogen).

THC is used for valid medical purposes, including managing addiction. Please educate yourself.

Encouraging people with a drug (alcohol) problem to switch to a different drug is a terrible idea. IIRC that’s how heroin came about.

Cannabis/THC has no standard strength, no standard dosing, no standard purity, no manufacturing standards, is not generally recognized as sage for any condition, is not generally recognized as effective for any condition, and I don’t think even pharmaceutical THC is approved for any condition.

“Medical” marijuana is a fraud and always was a fraud, foisted on the gullible to garner support for unrestricted recreational use.

“Medical” marijuana actually undergoes stringent QA, unlike recreational marijuana. The distinction is there for a reason.

Which means you need to be under medical supervision and it's prescribed, isn't it? And where do you "fill" this prescription? Probably the same stores. These stores sell to anyone and anything, the lines of medical vs. recreational use had been blurred once it's been legalized. When you say OP can get some gummies you were specific that she needed to go to a doctor and get evaluated and get specifically dosed prescription. I don't pretend to know, but I am guessing doctors dealing with addictions that cannot be managed without medication probably resort to different other medications before they prescribe pot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree your GI issues are likely alcohol related. I wish someone had told my mom that five years ago.

I like seltzer water with fresh lime. Or water with lime. More than just one wedge, a good pour of lime juice.

You could also try gummies. Then you won't be bored.

THC gummies? Those are way worse than alcohol, do not even go there.

They are in no way “way worse” than alcohol. The body is equipped with an endocannabinoid system. Alcohol is just a neurotoxin (and a carcinogen).

THC is used for valid medical purposes, including managing addiction. Please educate yourself.

Encouraging people with a drug (alcohol) problem to switch to a different drug is a terrible idea. IIRC that’s how heroin came about.

Cannabis/THC has no standard strength, no standard dosing, no standard purity, no manufacturing standards, is not generally recognized as sage for any condition, is not generally recognized as effective for any condition, and I don’t think even pharmaceutical THC is approved for any condition.

“Medical” marijuana is a fraud and always was a fraud, foisted on the gullible to garner support for unrestricted recreational use.

“Medical” marijuana actually undergoes stringent QA, unlike recreational marijuana. The distinction is there for a reason.

Of course it does. And nobody would ever cut corners or mislabel anything or maybe buy some street dope for “medical” purposes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AA is a cult and is not even close to being an effective way of staying sober. Look it up.

No advice except to say - yeah, it’s boring. Do you have a lot of underlying trauma? This is a good time to confront and process that.

+1. It is essentially a religious cult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AA is a cult and is not even close to being an effective way of staying sober. Look it up.

No advice except to say - yeah, it’s boring. Do you have a lot of underlying trauma? This is a good time to confront and process that.

+1. It is essentially a religious cult.

How can something so completely un-organized be a “cult?” What other “cult” is free of charge, let’s people define their own higher power if they even want one, says all of its “tenets” are just suggestions, and is organized, if at all, at the local meeting level?

I think that a lot of people who don’t like AA feel that way because it threatens their drinking. I think this is particularly common in people who have never tried it themselves and give more credence to the complaints of third parties than to the daily lived experience of members, not a few of which have been sober for decades.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are using alcohol to manage depression from the death of a spouse.

You need a therapist that specializes in mourning and loss.

Since this was a suicide you also have PTSD and should treat trauma with DBT.

The Wendy center is the best place for this.

Get help, you are not an alcoholic yet but once you are the addiction will be way tougher to break than it is now.

I agree with this PP. It sounds like you’ve been self medicating with alcohol after a very painful year. Self medicating with substances is very common. Depression and boredom have some similarities - apathy, restlessness - which you don’t notice as much when you’re drinking.

I am proud of you for recognizing there is an issue, and also suggest you seek a counselor who specializes in grief to help you confront your loss.

Wishing you all the best.

[Anonymous]

Physical activity. Sign up for adult sports leagues (basketball, softball, flag football, whatever). The other nights, sign up for some bootcamp classes at the gym.

7:00 PM is the sweet spot. You have to leave the house by 6:30 to get to the gym. Class from 7-745. Home and showered by 830. Then a bite to eat for dinner, and by then its already 9.

I also feel the pull for a cocktail btwn 5-8, so I keep those hours occupied. If I can get to 9, I just chill for a bit and then go tobed

[Anonymous]

This is sort of a bandaid suggestion for a larger problem of dealing with a really tough time in your life but I highly recommmend —
— finding some funny or fun T. Shows to stream. It will fill the hours and just the humor will really release positive endorphins.
— finding some good podcasts on a topic you like and listening while you walk your dog—again will fill your mind with something positive
- also little short bursts of puzzles like the NYtimes online games, duolingo, etc.

The longer term fix is to make some more friends in your new location, find some new hobbies, and maybe get into therapy to deal with your loss.

[Anonymous]

I appreciate the advice from everyone. I don’t think AA is for me. Alcohol played a big role in my partner’s death, and it would be incredibly triggering. I will work on working out and forcing myself to do some hobbies I used to enjoy. I just need to make myself do it.

Thank you, everyone.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t read the whole thread OP so apologies if someone has already pointed this out:

You aren’t bored. You have some feelings you don’t want to feel and that boredom is rising anxiety and the alcohol is how you’ve been stuffing it all down.

Try mindfulness. It’s a very effective way to manage emotion and cultivate the ability to sit in a room with yourself.

If you’re really adventurous you could try AA or individual therapy and figure out what it is you’ve been stuffing down with alcohol all these years.

[Anonymous]

Just scanning back at prior posts and want to offer my sincere condolences on your loss.

Among the other good suggestions, consider trying mindfulness meditation. It can help with all kinds of things, including grief.

Best to you on the journey.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree your GI issues are likely alcohol related. I wish someone had told my mom that five years ago.

I like seltzer water with fresh lime. Or water with lime. More than just one wedge, a good pour of lime juice.

You could also try gummies. Then you won't be bored.

THC gummies? Those are way worse than alcohol, do not even go there.

They are in no way “way worse” than alcohol. The body is equipped with an endocannabinoid system. Alcohol is just a neurotoxin (and a carcinogen).

THC is used for valid medical purposes, including managing addiction. Please educate yourself.

Encouraging people with a drug (alcohol) problem to switch to a different drug is a terrible idea. IIRC that’s how heroin came about.

Cannabis/THC has no standard strength, no standard dosing, no standard purity, no manufacturing standards, is not generally recognized as sage for any condition, is not generally recognized as effective for any condition, and I don’t think even pharmaceutical THC is approved for any condition.

“Medical” marijuana is a fraud and always was a fraud, foisted on the gullible to garner support for unrestricted recreational use.

“Medical” marijuana actually undergoes stringent QA, unlike recreational marijuana. The distinction is there for a reason.

Of course it does. And nobody would ever cut corners or mislabel anything or maybe buy some street dope for “medical” purposes.

Yes, goodness, because nothing ever goes wrong using pharmaceuticals. Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AA is a cult and is not even close to being an effective way of staying sober. Look it up.

No advice except to say - yeah, it’s boring. Do you have a lot of underlying trauma? This is a good time to confront and process that.

+1. It is essentially a religious cult.

How can something so completely un-organized be a “cult?” What other “cult” is free of charge, let’s people define their own higher power if they even want one, says all of its “tenets” are just suggestions, and is organized, if at all, at the local meeting level?

I think that a lot of people who don’t like AA feel that way because it threatens their drinking. I think this is particularly common in people who have never tried it themselves and give more credence to the complaints of third parties than to the daily lived experience of members, not a few of which have been sober for decades.

You can remain blind if you wish, but all the markers are there. I got out. Godspeed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree your GI issues are likely alcohol related. I wish someone had told my mom that five years ago.

I like seltzer water with fresh lime. Or water with lime. More than just one wedge, a good pour of lime juice.

You could also try gummies. Then you won't be bored.

THC gummies? Those are way worse than alcohol, do not even go there.

They are in no way “way worse” than alcohol. The body is equipped with an endocannabinoid system. Alcohol is just a neurotoxin (and a carcinogen).

THC is used for valid medical purposes, including managing addiction. Please educate yourself.

Encouraging people with a drug (alcohol) problem to switch to a different drug is a terrible idea. IIRC that’s how heroin came about.

Cannabis/THC has no standard strength, no standard dosing, no standard purity, no manufacturing standards, is not generally recognized as sage for any condition, is not generally recognized as effective for any condition, and I don’t think even pharmaceutical THC is approved for any condition.

“Medical” marijuana is a fraud and always was a fraud, foisted on the gullible to garner support for unrestricted recreational use.

“Medical” marijuana actually undergoes stringent QA, unlike recreational marijuana. The distinction is there for a reason.

Not true. "Medical" and "recreational" refers to the user, not to the marijuana.

https://www.goodrx.com/classes/cannabinoids/medicinal-vs-recreational-weed-marijuana

Medical marijuana refers to having a doctor's note. Recreational marijuana means it's allowed to all adults.