Being sober is boring as hell

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What did you used to do while drinking that was fun that you are no longer doing? Is it just the socializing? Is it that you don't want to be around people who are drinking, or that you find the people who used to be interesting are no longer fun now that you're drunk?

The answers to those questions would change the advice I would offer.

That’s kind of the problem. I took a job in an area where I have one husband and wife set of friends. My partner died by suicide last summer. My child moved out last year. It’s just me and my dog. All of these changes were more manageable with booze, and now I’m stuck with the quiet and the boredom.

Some of this is likely also depression. I’m just stuck with a lot of unpleasant feelings, and things I used to enjoy aren’t fun anymore. Reading through this thread has kind of clarified this part.

Do you work? If you had a job you would be forced to not drink during workdays and also would stay busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree your GI issues are likely alcohol related. I wish someone had told my mom that five years ago.

I like seltzer water with fresh lime. Or water with lime. More than just one wedge, a good pour of lime juice.

You could also try gummies. Then you won't be bored.

THC gummies? Those are way worse than alcohol, do not even go there.

No they do not affect your liver, esophagus, kidneys, in the same way. Nor do they cause cancer.

No one is prescribing alcohol like they do THC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What did you used to do while drinking that was fun that you are no longer doing? Is it just the socializing? Is it that you don't want to be around people who are drinking, or that you find the people who used to be interesting are no longer fun now that you're drunk?

The answers to those questions would change the advice I would offer.

That’s kind of the problem. I took a job in an area where I have one husband and wife set of friends. My partner died by suicide last summer. My child moved out last year. It’s just me and my dog. All of these changes were more manageable with booze, and now I’m stuck with the quiet and the boredom.

Some of this is likely also depression. I’m just stuck with a lot of unpleasant feelings, and things I used to enjoy aren’t fun anymore. Reading through this thread has kind of clarified this part.

Do you work? If you had a job you would be forced to not drink during workdays and also would stay busy.

It says I moved to this area for a job. I still have that job.

[Anonymous]

I've seen people like you many times in my almost 50 years of sobriety. The ones who commit to a life of sobriety are not bored, they understand they can't use alcohol and have wonderful lives. The others, well let's say many of them are no longer with us because they refused to change and realize there is life in sobriety.

[Anonymous]

Only boring people are bored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been drinking too much for about 3 or 4 years. I now have to stop due to pretty bad GI issues that I’m fairly certain were caused by drinking.

It’s just so boring! I know I need to pickup some hobbies, but how long does this last? I’ve been trying to cut back, with varying success for about a year. I have a terrible attitude about quitting when I don’t want to quit.

Anyone who’s BTDT have any idea how long this lasts? I’ve been mostly alcohol-free for more than 2 weeks.

That just confirms you are an alcoholic.

+100000

Life's boring without booze? Seriously? I think you should probably go to AA ASAP.

OP already stopped drinking. AA will only add additional boredom.

No he/she hasn't. Quote from post: "I’ve been mostly alcohol-free for more than 2 weeks." OP is an alcoholic.

[Anonymous]

The lack of imagination is astounding to me. There are so, so many things that I want to do, classes I want to take, books I want read, hobbies I want to take up. My kids are in high school and I really look forward to the day that I can do more "me" stuff when they are launched. I can't imagine just being "bored" because I can't drink alcohol?

[Anonymous]

Alcohol made you sick and weak.

Being healthy and strong will be fun.

It will take time to get there. You can do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The lack of imagination is astounding to me. There are so, so many things that I want to do, classes I want to take, books I want read, hobbies I want to take up. My kids are in high school and I really look forward to the day that I can do more "me" stuff when they are launched. I can't imagine just being "bored" because I can't drink alcohol?

Clearly OP is depressed from the death of her spouse. It's more complicated than simply being bored.

[Anonymous]

Would you be able to volunteer regularly? When I was in a bad emotional place, I started volunteering weekly at a food bank. It gave me something tangible to do that helped my community and also gave me perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So we don’t get off track calling OP names.

Stages of alcohol use -> alcoholism

Social drinking - healthy
Habitual drinking - unhealthy
Daily or binge drinking - alcohol abuse
Addicted to alcohol - Alcoholism

OP has an unhealthy relationship with alcohol.

Curious where you got this? I thought the current diagnosis was the stages of Substance Use Disorder.

4 stages of drug abuse

Some people also call step 1 experimental use.

Some use a 7 step model

Initiation
Experimentation
Regular Usage
Risky Usage
Dependence
Addiction
Crisis/Treatment

Either way I think OP is abusing alcohol but not addicted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been drinking too much for about 3 or 4 years. I now have to stop due to pretty bad GI issues that I’m fairly certain were caused by drinking.

It’s just so boring! I know I need to pickup some hobbies, but how long does this last? I’ve been trying to cut back, with varying success for about a year. I have a terrible attitude about quitting when I don’t want to quit.

Anyone who’s BTDT have any idea how long this lasts? I’ve been mostly alcohol-free for more than 2 weeks.

That just confirms you are an alcoholic.

What a pointless insult.

[Anonymous]

You are using alcohol to manage depression from the death of a spouse.

You need a therapist that specializes in mourning and loss.

Since this was a suicide you also have PTSD and should treat trauma with DBT.

The Wendy center is the best place for this.

Get help, you are not an alcoholic yet but once you are the addiction will be way tougher to break than it is now.

[Anonymous]

AA is a cult and is not even close to being an effective way of staying sober. Look it up.

No advice except to say - yeah, it’s boring. Do you have a lot of underlying trauma? This is a good time to confront and process that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been drinking too much for about 3 or 4 years. I now have to stop due to pretty bad GI issues that I’m fairly certain were caused by drinking.

It’s just so boring! I know I need to pickup some hobbies, but how long does this last? I’ve been trying to cut back, with varying success for about a year. I have a terrible attitude about quitting when I don’t want to quit.

Anyone who’s BTDT have any idea how long this lasts? I’ve been mostly alcohol-free for more than 2 weeks.

That just confirms you are an alcoholic.

+100000

Life's boring without booze? Seriously? I think you should probably go to AA ASAP.

OP already stopped drinking. AA will only add additional boredom.

You don’t have even an infinitesimal inkling what you’re talking about. AA is not for everybody, but for some people it provides a badly needed social network of fellow non-drinkers glad to support a fellow person in recovery. AA meetings are filled with laughter, unbelievable stories, and a lot of authentic feelings. If somebody announces in an AA meeting that they’re bored, they won’t be bored long.