Meeting a Guy in Big Law

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were these women baking for your man? Or just sending in cookies for the entire office at Christmas? I am a happily married woman who does the latter. Please don’t read into it…

No, dear it was special made for my kids. She baked it with a friend. Not once, many times. Then even after she left came back to the office party (I didn’t use to go), but I was there. The cringe. Never heard from her since then and good riddance.

What surprised me with this younger woman was the amount of make up. It’s that stuff popularized by the Kardashians that we used to think of as stage make up. Also, the lack of own ambition.

Oh, they are plenty ambitious and calculating… Lots of men can’t help but respond favorably to being fawned over and mothered with homemade cookies. Their responses typically don’t include marriage proposals.

No one wants your "man" who probably looks like shit after years of a high stress job. I know a big law partner who is 38 and looks 50. He is really smart and funny but I can't imagine some 22yo paralegal chasing after him.

Yet they do all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met mine when we were both in law school. He’s a partner now and I don’t know a single partner who isn’t married unless he’s divorced. The vast majority of my biglaw friends paired up while in law school come to think of it (of course not all with lawyers but a LOT are).

Lawyers tend to be married to law school classmates -- maybe not married when they start in big law -- just dating. But on the guy side the first and second round draft picks are already married.

This is my experience as a millennial. The overwhelming majority of my law school friends are married to another lawyer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A bit of practical advice for the gold-diggers looking to marry a Biglaw partner. Make sure that he is an equity partner. Big firms have a lower category of partners that go by the terms non-equity, stipend, or income partners. You don't want to go near one of these. They are like glorified associates who have the title partner, but they work a zillion hours and carry all the stress of a big firm lawyer, but don't earn seven figure pay like the equity partners. as a woman chasing a glitzy lifestyle you would be getting the downside without the upside. so on the first date/interview with a biglaw partner, be sure you ask about that.

Omg slay kween. Thank u for this advice. Gonna go stand outside Kirkland & Ellis at 5pm and see what happens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The good ones married their law school girlfriends.

I actually went to law school and worked in Biglaw. 90% of the wives are plain.

YES!!!!!!!!! That is what they are looking for. No drama.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A bit of practical advice for the gold-diggers looking to marry a Biglaw partner. Make sure that he is an equity partner. Big firms have a lower category of partners that go by the terms non-equity, stipend, or income partners. You don't want to go near one of these. They are like glorified associates who have the title partner, but they work a zillion hours and carry all the stress of a big firm lawyer, but don't earn seven figure pay like the equity partners. as a woman chasing a glitzy lifestyle you would be getting the downside without the upside. so on the first date/interview with a biglaw partner, be sure you ask about that.

Omg slay kween. Thank u for this advice. Gonna go stand outside Kirkland & Ellis at 5pm and see what happens

Well the support staff may leave but the lawyers leave anywhere from 7-11 pm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were these women baking for your man? Or just sending in cookies for the entire office at Christmas? I am a happily married woman who does the latter. Please don’t read into it…

No, dear it was special made for my kids. She baked it with a friend. Not once, many times. Then even after she left came back to the office party (I didn’t use to go), but I was there. The cringe. Never heard from her since then and good riddance.

What surprised me with this younger woman was the amount of make up. It’s that stuff popularized by the Kardashians that we used to think of as stage make up. Also, the lack of own ambition.

Oh, they are plenty ambitious and calculating… Lots of men can’t help but respond favorably to being fawned over and mothered with homemade cookies. Their responses typically don’t include marriage proposals.

No one wants your "man" who probably looks like shit after years of a high stress job. I know a big law partner who is 38 and looks 50. He is really smart and funny but I can't imagine some 22yo paralegal chasing after him.

Yet they do all the time.

10 years in biglaw now and I can’t think of a single example of a paralegal chasing a partner. I know some that dated associates but that’s about it.

Especially because biglaw paralegals, at least the young ones, are “pre law” AKA working as a paralegal as a gap between college and law school. They don’t need a rich old man, they can do what most of us do and marry a classmate on his way up.

[Anonymous]

How does a Big Law partner leave work at 430 and make dinner every night? Is that common?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does a Big Law partner leave work at 430 and make dinner every night? Is that common?

My husband does. Then logs on again at 7. I admit pre-Covid this wasn't as easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does a Big Law partner leave work at 430 and make dinner every night? Is that common?

I know one very senior Supreme Court litigator who leaves at 4:30 as a default rule. So, sure. It exists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where do they hang out?

https://www.netflix.com/title/81423793

https://www.netflix.com/title/80244565

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does a Big Law partner leave work at 430 and make dinner every night? Is that common?

Idk but no one needs to make dinner every night. I don't care if you are big law partner, Chef Ramsey or a SAHM, order take out, go to restaurants or eat leftovers, whatever meets your budget but cooking every night is just too much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does a Big Law partner leave work at 430 and make dinner every night? Is that common?

Idk but no one needs to make dinner every night. I don't care if you are big law partner, Chef Ramsey or a SAHM, order take out, go to restaurants or eat leftovers, whatever meets your budget but cooking every night is just too much.

And this is why America is fat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where do they hang out?

Jails

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Search threads here for "big law." Many posts by women (and some men) married to big law attorneys, complaining how their spouses neglect the marriages, leave the spouse to deal with the kids entirely, cheat, etc. Then go right ahead and hunt for your big law man, but do it informed about what others have experienced. I'm sure you'll say "That won't happen to me!"

Hope they all get prenups. The wives don't deserve 1/2

[Anonymous]

What is the obsession with Big Law? Just so she can brag to her friends? BFD…