Dating At 33 For Women.

[Anonymous]

I just turned 33 and recently ended a 1.5 year relationship. He broke it off. I am a currently work 80+ hours a week. I am a little terrified I will end up 40 and still single. How do I look for a husband while working 80+ hours a week? My ex-boyfriend is a colleague, and majority of the people I work with are already married or have major deal breakers. My biggest caveat is I still undecided if I want children.

[Anonymous]

If you really want a long-term relationship. you need to remember that at the end of the day your job doesn't love you back. Make time for yourself - not just to find a husband, but to have a more well-rounded life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just turned 33 and recently ended a 1.5 year relationship. He broke it off. I am a currently work 80+ hours a week. I am a little terrified I will end up 40 and still single. How do I look for a husband while working 80+ hours a week? My ex-boyfriend is a colleague, and majority of the people I work with are already married or have major deal breakers. My biggest caveat is I still undecided if I want children.

Do you really work 80 hour weeks, every week? Taken literally, that's over 13 hours per day, 6 days per week.

Is it possible to get your career to a point where you can go on "cruise control" for a few years while you focus on your personal life?

[Anonymous]

What do you do that adds up to 80 hours a week?

[Anonymous]

I can see your future... it involves many, many cats.

[Anonymous]

You need to online date and get creative. Lunch dates. Dinner dates and back to work. Treat it like a job.

[Anonymous]

Realistically, you're going to have a hard time finding a relationship with those hours.

I know people who work those hours...they either

1. Are single
2. Have a rocky marriage
3. Have a pretty decent marriage but the spouse who works less pretty much has their own life and they get together as a couple pretty seldom. It works for them but I think it's rare
4. Were dating before the crazy hours started and the crazy hours are temporary in order to advance

[Anonymous]

You are already married to your job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just turned 33 and recently ended a 1.5 year relationship. He broke it off. I am a currently work 80+ hours a week. I am a little terrified I will end up 40 and still single. How do I look for a husband while working 80+ hours a week? My ex-boyfriend is a colleague, and majority of the people I work with are already married or have major deal breakers. My biggest caveat is I still undecided if I want children.

Do you really work 80 hour weeks, every week? Taken literally, that's over 13 hours per day, 6 days per week.

Is it possible to get your career to a point where you can go on "cruise control" for a few years while you focus on your personal life?

I’m a medical resident specializing in internal medicine. I work anywhere from 10-16 hours shifts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can see your future... it involves many, many cats.

I’m not a pet person and have an allergy to cats. Not going to happen there.

[Anonymous]

Why wouldn’t you want to have at least one child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why wouldn’t you want to have at least one child?

Huge repsonsility and major life change, less focus on my career, lack of sleep, strain it puts on many marriages, worry of caring for another human life, etc. I’ve always been very nurturing but I don’t know if I have what it takes to be a mom. I feel a child will be more of a career ender than a gift at this point. I may change my mind, but the thought of having children right now is very overwhelming and dreadful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why wouldn’t you want to have at least one child?

Would you be asking the OP this stupid question if she were a man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why wouldn’t you want to have at least one child?

Huge repsonsility and major life change, less focus on my career, lack of sleep, strain it puts on many marriages, worry of caring for another human life, etc. I’ve always been very nurturing but I don’t know if I have what it takes to be a mom. I feel a child will be more of a career ender than a gift at this point. I may change my mind, but the thought of having children right now is very overwhelming and dreadful.

This is the reason my ex-boyfriend broke it often. He was certain he wanted to have children, and my uncertainty lead him to reconsider marrying me. I’m thinking of doing online dating and putting it on my profile that I don’t want kids. Maybe it will attract men who are unsure themselves or decided they don’t want children. I know my pool is limited because I am almost 50% positive I don’t want children. If I did, maybe not until 38+.

[Anonymous]

Date someone with a similar career path. No one else will be as understanding of your schedule. But 33 is a great age; if kids aren’t a motivation for getting married you have plenty of time.