My mom really wants to take care of my baby
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Anonymous
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I have no doubt she'll be great with her, the issue is she can only do it every other week, That means on her off weeks I'll need a nanny, and of course none of the nannies we're interviewing want to work every other week.
Help me come up with a solution that doesn't cut my mom of completely. |
Anonymous
| I'm sure you can find a flexible nanny / baby sitter just post th3 details in the description of the job. You could have your mom watch the baby on weekends or date nights? That's great your mom wants to,help out! |
Anonymous
| What's out a nanny who could work M-F one week, and M-Th the next. So a 9-day schedule. And 10th day is for your mom. Maybe there's a nanny out there who would like a weekday off. Doesn't have to be Friday either. Any one day out of ten weekdays, and make it a pattern? |
Anonymous
| What's out = what about |
Anonymous
| Our wonderful nanny works Monday thru Thursday, 40 hours a week. I spend Fridays with my DD but you could have the same arrangement as I with your mother taking your baby every Friday. |
Anonymous
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Hmm. Maybe a nanny share would work? You'd still have to pay for the full time spot, but would be cheaper since it's a share. That also gives your mom some flexibility if she can't watch your child one week, or for one day here or there due to illness or travel etc.
I will also say, my mother is local and retired and WONDERFUL. We use her as back up care for my kids. So when daycare is closed for a week at the holidays, or for a random day I don't get off, or for the providers vacation time, my mom watches my kids. She will also help if they are sick. So that random cold where the baby really is ok, but needs some better rest than they could get at daycare, she'll come over and baby sit. It's awesome. She's really wonderful about last minute things that pop up, and she gets to spend a LOT of time with my kids without committing to a full time care schedule. She also sometimes picks them up from daycare early and gets in some extra time then too. |
Anonymous
| Only you know your mom, but the idea of requesting one week on and one week off sounds crazy to me. Does she really think you're going to be able to find someone else to watch your child every other week? I would get a nanny and maybe let your mom have one day every week or every other week, but make sure the nanny will be willing to come on those days as well because your mom kind of sounds like the kind of person who would change their mind about this a few weeks in. |
Anonymous
It would be easier if your mom could do it 3 days a week or something -- why only every other week? My mom watches my child part time and she is amazing. |
Anonymous
| Agree that every week needs to be the same for this to save you money. Otherwise, you'll pay for a FT spot and just use it half the time - still good for grandparent relationship, but not a moneysaver. |
Anonymous
+1. What is she doing every other week? |
Anonymous
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OP here.
My parents live in Florida, not ready to move up this way yet, but my mom doesn't want to miss out on a relationship with her granddaughter especially since DH's family is local ( Maryland). Mom is retired so she figures she can fly up here a week at a time get to know the baby. I know it sounds crazy, but this is important to her and I want my daughter to know her grandmother too, |
Anonymous
| I don't know many nannies or daycares that accommodate that schedule. Can she just spend time over the weekend/evenings when she is in town? Or pick up your daughter early on those days? What if your Mom gets ill or can't make it one week? Then you would be stuck without childcare. I"m all for bonding with family but you also need a reliable child care provider. |
Anonymous
I think this is a bad idea. There may be times where your mom can't make a flight for whatever reason and that would be a lot of pressure on her and on you to find other care. My friend's in-laws live in Florida and visit frequently. On their last visit, I talked to her MIL and she expressed how difficult it had gotten for her to come so often, especially in the winters. You could always pull your LO out of daycare for a week every month or so to spend with Grandma or if you have a nanny, give your nanny plenty of vacation time when Grandma is visiting. More vacation time for a nanny may offset overtime on regular weeks. |
Anonymous
| Ugh, no. She is going to live with you two weeks a month? What if she gets sick? Bad weather? Hire a nanny and grandma can come visit as much as she likes. This plan is totally crazy and not workable, at all. |
Anonymous
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No, that's clearly not going to work. Babies that little need a routine, and it's going to be very hard to find (and keep) a nanny who wants to work a part-time schedule like that. Part-time nannies are hard enough to find, but a week-on week-off schedule seems even harder, since she won't even be able to have a second job or go to school with that schedule.
Just tell your mom you're sorry but you need full-time care. My MIL (who I wouldn't have trusted with the baby anyway) tried to claim that she would be the nanny. I shut that down right away by pointing out that she'd have to show up full time, 5 days a week, 9 hrs/day. In her mind she'd somehow been thinking that she could be full-time childcare by just showing up a few hours a day a few days a week. It's great that your mom wants to spend lots of time with the baby. Tell her she's welcome whenever, but that you will be hiring professional, full-time care. Because you need that in order to keep your job. |